I planned on bringing the idea to Ryan about giving us another try but the words were lodged in my throat. This was a lot harder than I thought.
"Are you ok? It looks like you're having an internal battle in your head or something." He chuckled.
Ok, change of plans.
"I was just wondering if you wanted to stay—like here with me."
He cocked a brow as a smile pulled at the corner of his lips. "I thought that's what I was already doing or did you plan on throwing me out already?"
"No, I mean temporarily stay with me that way you can stay away from that toxic environment and focus on saving up for a place of your own."
"Oh, wow," He ran his fingers over the stubble on his jaw. "That seems like a good idea and all, but I need to think about it first. Is that ok?"
"Of course," I smiled and hugged him before heading to my bedroom to get ready for bed. What the hell was I thinking asking him something like that? Leah's gonna kill me.
The next morning I woke up earlier than usual and noticed Ryan was already gone. I knew he had work but I didn't think Dave would call him in so early.
I took a quick shower and went to my art room to start on a new painting while he was gone. While sketching, I dialed up Leah and put her on speaker.
"We were just gossiping about you." She immediately said after picking up.
I cocked a brow and placed the phone beside me. "Who's we? And I hope it's nothing but good things."
"Clair and of course. We're just doing some cleaning right now, what's up?"
"I tried telling Ryan how I felt last night, but I think I fucked up."
"Tell me everything!"
"There's not much to tell since I couldn't go through with it, but guess what I did instead like a huge idiot."
She gasped in excitement, " You fucked him?"
"I practically told him to move in with me, I mean who in their right mind does that?"
"This isn't a big deal. Just tell him you changed your mind, simple."
"And leave him to fend for himself with his asshole dad? Yeah no, I can't do that."
"So just see how it goes then. It's not like you told him how you feel so everything should be normal, aside from the fact that you guys fool around."
"It's never happening again." I lied. If the moment is right and I'm feeling a type of way there's no telling what'll happen.
"Yeah, whatever I have to go. See ya later." She blew kisses and ended the call.
I continued working on my art until my hands cramped up and ached. Ok, time for work.
"Would you like a refill?" I smiled at the older man in front of me who's been giving me googly eyes since I came in for my shift.
"Yes, ma'am." He smirked and I cringed internally.
I don't understand why people come to the bar in the daytime, do they not have somewhere more important to be other than drinking the hours away?
"Are we ok?"
I nearly jumped when I turned to face Ryan and noticed he was super close to me.
"Yeah, why?"
"Because I've been texting you all morning before your shift and never got a reply."
"My phone was on silent, sorry."
He clenched his jaw and turned away from me. "I made up my mind. Until things blow over with my dad I'll stay with you."
"You sure?" I smiled. "Because I don't want you to feel like you have to."
He placed his hands on my shoulders and pressed a kiss against my forehead, attracting the eyes of the customers at the bar. "I'll go pack a bag or two after work."
After my shift was up, Ryan and I went our separate ways and I went to meet up with Seth
After my shift was up, Ryan and I went our separate ways and I went to meet up with Seth. It's been a long time since I've seen him, but we text all the time, so I could say we're becoming good friends. The age gap wasn't a problem at all; just because he's older it doesn't mean he didn't deserve my company.
I shot Ryan a quick text to let him know I would be home late then I put my phone on vibrate and stuck it into my pocket. "I'm glad to see you're not wearing a suit today." I walked up to the table that Seth sat at and he stood up to greet me properly with a hug.
"I would've stood out like a sore thumb in a place like this." He glanced around the diner.
I sat down beside him and opened up the menu. "So, you've been here before?"
"Actually, no. I've never even heard of this place," he replied while scanning over the menu. I looked up at him and he met my eyes.
"That's impossible, this place is well known by everyone who lives here."
"I don't live here, Violet."
Oh. I was under the impression that he stayed here, but I guess I was wrong.
"So where do you live?" I placed my menu on the table.
"I live in New Jersey with my kids, but my job is here in New York."
"At least now I know why you never invited me out before."
He shook his head and laughed. "Trust me, there were so many times I wanted your company, but being a single parent means I don't have a lot of free time for myself." He slipped his phone from his pocket and turned the screen to me.
"This is Conor and this is Laila." He pointed to the two little kids on his screen who looked to be about ten years old. They both had their dad's features, brown hair, and green eyes. They even had his adorable button nose.
"Aw, you have twins? They're so cute." I smiled at the picture and then glanced up at him. He returned the warm smile and placed his phone on the table.
"Yeah, they're my whole world and so much more."
I placed my hand over his and caressed it with my thumb. "They come first, we'll still have time to get to know each other on a deeper level."
Spending time with Seth was amazing. So much better than the late-night calls and flirty texts. After we were done with our meal, I drove home and Seth drove behind me in his car. I assured him that I would get home safely, but he insisted that he would make sure of it so I didn't argue.
"Thank you for tonight," I slammed my car door closed and walked to his car. He got out and hugged me and then his eyes were on my lips.
Fuck it.
I leaned in for a kiss and he did the same. He tried to deepen it, but I quickly pulled away. He was a good kisser, but I don't need this going any further.
I turned to walk up to my building and noticed Ryan standing there. His eyes followed Seth's car as it drove away and then they darkened as he glared at me.
"Who was that?" He asked.
"Didn't I give you my key to let yourself in?" I brushed past him to enter the lobby while he followed close behind.
"You don't answer a question with another question."
I exhaled and entered the elevator, "Fine, he's a friend."
"Friend or friends with benefits?"
I playfully rolled my eyes with a smile on my face. "Yeah, we're friends with benefits," I joked. I watched as his expression changed from calm to slightly irritated, he furrowed his brows.
"With that old man? Come on you can do better than that."
I chuckled and walked away because this was a joke.
"Wait," he stepped in front of me.
I sighed and looked up at him. A hint of sadness was in his eyes, but it was gone as fast as it came.
"Were you joking? Because I can't tell."
"Am I?" I kissed his cheek and entered the apartment.