Back at the Doggonit Transport main terminal...
While Andrew ate banana's with his ass, the DM's prepared snacks of their own in celebration of national DM day. This isn't actually a recognized holiday, it was made up by Jimmie Dawn and the others just to have a day or two out of two months in the year for self appreciation.
"And happy DM day, you lazy sons o' bitches!" Jimmie Dawn walks into the break room with a large cake on a platter and a large bowl under it in his hands. "Ya'll better have brought your very best HOMEMADE food."
"We did!" Judy says. Judy is the eldest of all the DM's at Doggonit Transport but she still has that young flare to her personality. She's a Filipina with dyed, walnut blonde hair and coffee black eyes. Even before Jimmie appointed the 7th of every January and July as DM day, Judy would always bring in homemade snacks, drinks and food for the team and everyone loved her even more for it. But on DM day, she makes sure to put her Louisiana soul into it.
"You know I always bring my best to the table", Judy says in her thick Louisiana accent as she laid out her large, aluminum trays filled with enough for everybody and some. Jimmie sets the cake down on the end of the table. It had seven candles and the words; "DM Day" written in strawberry colored icing.
"Why's there always seven candles?" Nancy asks. Nancy was from the midwest and had very dark eyes, dark hair, but glowing fair skin. She is usually the quietest one in the room and is said to have a seductive voice and manner of speaking, as if she's trying to seduce you with her words.
"Because there's seven of us, there's seven days in a week, and seven is the number of the jackpot, just like what we got here with this delicious ass, mint chocolate chip and creme cake." Jimmie explains as he reveals another bowl. "I also brought a bowl of pistachio's."
"Who the hell's gonna eat all those damn pistachios? You should know by now that no one eats them but you." Fred is actually the Italian accounting and billing manager and he sometimes happens by the DM office to sneak away some food and drinks or hit on Nancy. He and Sally Mally are allowed at the DM Day party even though their not officially DM's because they are volunteers to fill in should anyone call out. That and their just always in the DM office for some reason. I guess accounting and safety gets kinda boring.
"Well, hopefully," Jimmie says, "someone around here will realize and appreciate the importance of a healthy snack to balance out all the junk we're bout to stuff into our faces."
"Hey, I didn't bring any junk food!" Judy growls.
"Neither did I," Nancy says, removing the plastic wrap from her bowls and trays. "I brought a garden salad made from organic ingredients out of my own garden, apple vinegar dressing, and walnut pieces for a little bit of a crunch, and I also brought an organic peach and pear cobbler."
"Now we're talkin'", Jimmie says, "thank you Nancy and Judy. What did you bring Stevano?"
Stevano is the recruiting manager and had been quiet this whole time and was standing at the other round table with his food that came in a basket covered by a cloth.
"Don't tell me there's banana's in that basket..." Jimmie says.
"There's banana's in this basket, BUT, you ever had chocolate covered strawberries? Well, these are chocolate covered banana slices." Stevano says, removing the cloth from the basket.
"At least it's a little bit different this time." Tyree, the only black guy at the office, walks in to the break room with a case of some beverage. Tyree was the last DM to be hired since the start of Doggonit, so he was sort of new. He was also known to embrace stereotypes to humor himself sometimes, like how today he brought grape flavored Dragon Piss.
"What you got there, Tyree?" Jimmie asks.
"Dragon piss." Tyree replies. "If you don't like grape flavor dragon piss then i'm sorry."
"This is the only thing I really hope isn't homemade..." Fred says.
"It's not, I picked it up at GobbleMart." Tyree says.
"I guess some folks just don't git the memo", Jimmie says with a sigh, "homemade means made at HOME, not bought at the store."
"You didn't let me finish, bro, damn." Tyree says, "I got the bottled carbonated water at the store, then I went home added some sugar and some grapes."
"Well, who wants some of my homemade jerky?" Fred calls over everyone talking. They all gather around Fred's bin of jerky. No one has brought in jerky before, let alone homemade jerky.
"What is it? Beef?" Tyree asks.
"It's classified." Fred says inconspicuously.
"Oh no, I gotta know what I'm eating." Tyree starts, "you don't tell me what it is, my mind starts thinking up theories, cannibals-"
"Don't worry, it's beef", Fred assures, "but that's all i'm telling you guys."
Just then, Sally Mally emerges into the break room, a small, glass encasement of some sort in her arms. Nobody seemed to notice her walk into the room as she delicately floated in and to the refrigerator where she placed the glass case with some unknown content inside.
Jimmie was the one to blow out the candles this time. Everyone applauded.
"To the DM's!" Jimmie howls.
"Yeah! To being safely seated in this warm, cozy office while our crazy truckers do all the crazy driving on them crazy ass roads out there!" Judy says, raising her bottle of Tyree's grape Dragon Piss into the air. Everyone raises their bottles of Dragon Piss to the center of the table and cheers before taking a gulp of the carbonated, homemade beverage, and damn near spitting it all out all over the place.
"Goddamn! This taste's like fuckin' dishwater and soap with grapes thrown in!" Judy cries.
"Shit! Is this actual piss out of a dragons balls?!" Fred groans.
"This tastes like muthufuckin'...piss! What the fuck is this Tyree?" Jimmie asks in disgust.
"Hey, I didn't get a chance to try it out myself." Tyree says, shrugging his shoulders. "I guess now we know."
"Yeah, now we know that only Tyree is allowed to buy brand products at the store instead of homemaking anything from now on." Jimmie choked on the after taste.
"I tell you guys this every DM day..." Tyree says. After everyone got over the awful taste of Tyree's dragon piss, they all dig in to the food and cake, except Sally who watched from the counter, her existence still going unnoticed as if she were some kind of ghost...