Eric and love hardly ever would be in the same sentence.
If that happened, it would be something like:''Eric doesn't know love yet…or When Eric was born, the creator forgot to add love to the recipe. ''
Obviously, that wasn't something he heard someone say about him: it was all in his head.
In his first life, his mask was so well-oiled that he had no problem finding a girlfriend during high school, getting a partner at work, or entering alone in a bar at the beginning of the night and returning to his hotel room with a girl in each arm.
The problem was that person wasn't him, and he could never describe one of his feelings as love.
He was just a talented actor that managed to attract persons of the opposite sex with his script lines.
When he met new people, just for a second, he was anxious about their opinions of him, then his charismatic and confident self took control of him in the most efficient way possible.
His input in the problem at hand was only choosing the objective for the following interaction.
This kind of thought brought him to sometimes feel estranged from his own body.
In high school, he got together with a girl because of curiosity and because he noted that the individuals at the top of the social pyramid had partners with whom they shared their time.
Later in life, when he started working at a company, he found a partner because he wanted a reliable source of relief when he finished working and returned home.
Finally, his bar adventures were also to satisfy his lust, but the main cause was his boredom.
After one month after the beginning of his relationship with his first girlfriend in high school, he started getting bored with his interactions with her.
He was able to predict her answers before she even spoke.
The boredom created resentment, and at the beginning of the fifth week from the start of their relationship, she 'voluntarily' decided to break up with him.
When he heard her, he sighed mentally.
Thankfully as planned!
Probably he would have done better staying with his work partner for a longer time, but unluckily, he started getting bored of her after two weeks.
The problem was he couldn't foresee her reactions yet when he decided to break up with her.
That was probably the greatest error during his first life.
He can say that with confidence given that she, during a rainy Saturday night, seeing Eric exiting from a club with a girl in his right arm the same day he broke up with her, decided pushing him under a hearse to put an end to her disgraceful first love experience.
His love approach didn't change much during his second life, but the adventures that always had put his life on the line relieved his boredom.
The Suspension Bridge effect first made their initial interactions more instinctive and less rational and finally tricked him into trusting the person in front of him with his life.
The results speak for themselves.
If he had to summarize the closest (or arguably the furthest) feeling to love he ever perceived was lust, that's it.
Given his experience and the fact that his two deaths were closely related to the topic of love, it was easy to understand his interactions with Rubra.
She was loved very much by her parents and sadly had a past mental scar because of their sudden departure, but also because of that, she was thirsty for the feeling of being loved for more than 200 years.
Eric, on the other hand, grew up with his single depressed mother that wasn't in the best condition to care for him and was traumatized because his two deaths were caused by those who usually, by society's standards, should love you.
It was like an arsonist getting closer with a creepy smile to a pile of dry branches.
The sad thing was Eric was the branches.
In the present moment, while the 'cutest arsonist in the world' was crying in his arms, Eric suddenly felt an intense chill along his back as if icy water was thrown at him.
After deciding to temporarily ignore that feeling, giving it away as his bodily reaction to hugging Rubra he continued speaking:''You can relax now, I'll continue speaking. ''
Feeling slightly awkward about the situation, he decided to continue his train of thoughts anyway, because he didn't want to procrastinate any longer until the moment of truth.
''As a person I value important in my life, I want to set things straight and tell you the truth!''
Hearing his heavy voice Rubra instinctively stopped crying as if acknowledging that his words needed her full attention at the moment, moreover the past effect of 'sister' was counterbalanced by that of 'important'.
''You see, I practiced a bit of herbal medicine in the past but it would be incorrect to call myself an herbalist…''
For a moment she felt like laughing at the minuscule lie he was giving so much weight to, but he continued.
''It can be said that in the past I died trying to save some people including Alec, but we weren't brothers, more like brothers under the Creator or two complete strangers…''
Rubra started being indecisive about her reaction, she became more serious and started thinking about the fact that Eric sacrificed his life to save some strangers but was slightly sad about his lie anyway, but he continued.
''Do you remember when I talked about a monster?... It was the monster of betrayal that dwelled in the hearts of my former comrades in arms…''
She was starting to get angry and consequently, the temperature of her surroundings became higher, Eric felt as if he was catapulted into the desert but had expected that much before bringing up the topic, so he continued.
''Finally, the part of the minotaur is always related to my past betrayal and the bloody angel is the same person I told you about a couple of days ago, the one who told me about my unexpressed potential, that's all I can tell you for now, unfortunately, there are many indiscreet ears.''
Intense flames started just as he ended his sentence first made her happy and sad at the same time knowing his lie about his real identity which wasn't that of a relatively common herbalist but that of probably a fighter (given his combat aptitude) that tried saving the lives of strangers around the world.
It made her remember the stories of heroes her parents told her about.
After she became enraged because of the betrayal he suffered at the hands of his companions but tried controlling her emotions because she felt how much Eric was struggling to talk about these sensitive topics.
She wasn't able to hold back anymore when she knew that so-called Esis was the reason he reincarnated, her jealousy was the main contributor to the present flames that were obviously reaping the lives of the surrounding plant life, luckily quickly restored in the mana-rich environment.
Surrounded in the flames Eric thought for a moment: if I hurt her that much, maybe it would be alright dying this way, it would definitely be a better look than my first two times…
I guess I can choose a more entertaining way to die a third time!
Then after that moment of indecision, he acted as planned, his body began to crumble while shouting in pain.
For a moment Rubra was distracted by her wrath and with that the flames became less intense.
Surely not wasting the moment he had gained Eric used again his magic in order to escape a couple of hundred meters away before enclosing himself in a sphere of bushy earth as if camouflaging in the forest.
After a couple of seconds in the dark, he heard her weeping with sadness even greater than when she told him about her parents' death.
A voice resonated in the air.
''Eric, why did you leave?''
Then with an even stronger voice.
''What wrong did I do to you?''
This was the moment Eric was the most dumbfounded in his whole life experience.