A burning question kept popping up in Zhang Fengxi's head every once in a while.
"What did Xie Jianyu mean to you?"
This question was followed up by another burning question, "What did Liu Wenyuan mean to you?"
The answers to these questions used to be straightforward.
"Xie Jianyu meant nothing to me. Liu Wenyuan is the love of my life," a smitten Zhang Fengxi in his youngster days would say.
Later on, after Zhang Fengxi found out the truth about Xie Jianyu, his answer changed.
"Xie Jianyu died because of me. I owe him the world. Liu Wenyuan is the love of my life."
After he returned from Heaven and Hell Peak -- based on what he experienced during the trial at Abyssal Ice Pond -- the answer to the first question changed into, "Xie Jianyu is the person I cannot bear to lose."
He did not dare to answer the second question.
Zhang Fengxi was glad that these monologues happened in his head, otherwise it would be difficult to answer the condemnations that followed.