'Feet first, drop and roll.'
Twas the plan.
The inn was rather tall, the floor above- a main stay for shaggetry was rather high from the ground floor where people buzzed and made a rowdy ruckus every second of any day, it were tall indeed and imagine kissing a cat-ear up the long and many stairs, twas bliss, twas simply just honestly bliss.
Fifteen feet high to be math-y, the distance I was sure a Descent could very well jump and tumble a roll and land safely and that was the plan, not was needed the afro to cushion and absorb the shock.
I knew I could do it, this body is rather fit and against fighting three unknown men with powers of caliber unknown– twas the wiser choice to jump, even as your thingie is hanging a tarzan with two balls.
Just below my feet then was Rip– still on all fours, still coughing up that last shot of puke. The masses of descents and the normal people of the world were just besides him, some eyes on him and some on mine- all eyes squinting in our obscenity.
And thine;
In the air and dangling;
A feet close to do the tumble and roll I now were but then–
"I got you! Burn!" I heard a mean yell coming from the balcony and right as the ears administered what they heard to the brain I was pushed in the back of the afro, felt not a pain or any but twas shoved and pushed- feeling the crackling little warmth of a firework blast- sprinkling little sparks in the neck, "Ouchie!" as I felt my tuck and roll momentum shift to a turbulence.
The push fucked up my descent as I– just mere feet before doing the tuck and roll was sent instead head first and landing a gruesome afro comet– planting my afro halfway through the stone-slabs of the road, planting me erect and putting thine physical secrets in full display for the crowds to see.
As children sparkled their eyes, ripened ladies blushed basking in the glory of my tender, some prudish women wailed seeing my dangling thing up close, their palms hurriedly forcing shut the children's eyes.
My own set of blues as I were planted granted me a view and thine spied at the balcony, I saw the three masked men and one of them was retracting his faint aura which he manipulated and formed out- likely the culprit who fucked-up my landing, "Too many eyes, get back for now!" said the man to his two masked fucks.
I was seething at their sight, "Oi! You fuckers! Get back here and finish the job bitches!" erected body and upside down I was, dick out and bare- what I spouted sounded atrocious to my exclusive taste of the bonking and to what and how I said it- people, NPCs and players of extraordinarily wildly dressed in the multitudes were sure to blink and cringed to their misunderstanding of what I just said, I caught their glances at me, indecency they dubbed thee with all their judge-y eyes and twas needed to reiterate them lot, "I mean- those guys up there are trying to kill me or something!" I pointed at the balcony but they quickly turned back at thine with deadened eyes of disbelief since none a masked men were there anymore.
'They spoilt everything, my shagging morning! And now a fucking misunderstanding!' I might've wailed from the thought- but then like a miniature rocket sized eclipse darkening the sun, my beautiful and recently made not a virgin shaft dangled down as my legs out of energy on being erect fell down slow.
Seizing the momentum I quickly tried to place my feet and pluck me off the ground but even as I reached as much as my whole body- neck to toe would allow, even stretching the thighs far as I possibly could, let alone my foot whole- the toes could barely touch the ground, 'I'm not deep enough!' I seethed frustrated air through the teeth, 'Damn things too big.' cursed I to the afro, the height of it, just simply the fucking size of the monstrosity of a hair which was it barred me from uprooting thine-self, my arms weren't simply then with enough freedom to work a massive push to free me up and out but damn sure did thine all gangs of cells gave an effort, even the little pecker as it raised and wiggled along with every stretch I did indeed did.
Yet with every effort, it only conjured more wailing from the prudes as my butthole stretches wider- revealing an unholy but whole crack as the legs split and thrash in my struggle, "Oh! Get a grip!" I scolded them lot, "Not like you haven't seen it already, I mean you wipe the shit off the butts of your kids don't you?"
Grunting along as I struggled and failed, "Rip!!" I finally called, "Pull me out!"
He was just next to thine, "In a minute," he said, still on all fours, sickened still from the tumbles, the rolls.
Then alas with another flush he stood, stumbling a foot, he then slowly came with the last of his puke finally out, "Good heavens bud! Ha-Ha!" as he finally saw my predicament- he sang, "I see a Heinie so bright and shiny!" He chortled from my back, still stumbling he then held my leg for support and then and there he caught a glance of my tender.
"Whew!" he blew a whistle, he sounded relieved when catching sight of my dangling thing.
"Wha- Did you just?"
"I did nothing!" he quickly replied.
"That was a sigh of relief, don't get your hopes up. My shit grew, It grew!" I was quick to defend my honour.
"Anything you say man!"
"Fucki- Just pull me out, Damn it!"
"Okay!" said he, coming closer, given the puffy and buffy and bushy tall afro- my junk was directly at face level with the man.
He then carefully pulled me by the leg, his neck stretching back as far it could- a sizeably safe distance from the crotch and he pulled, struggling his waist and limbs, only to fail with enough grunts.
"Just grab me by the waist and pull, it'll be easier." I told him.
"Okay!" he reluctantly exhumed.
However as he tried reaching a hand for a tight grip at thine's waist–
He paused a while- frozen when faced in a scent whiffing close to thine cock, "Anytime now Rip!" said I.
I saw him frozen- eye to eye with my shaft, slowly he then looked on down at yours truly, "I'm sorry man, I can't do it!"
he shook his head.
"What do you mean?"
"It's impossible!" a simpering smile telling me he can't.
"Don't fuck around with me now, I'm compromised!"
"I-I know and I'm sorry but-" he took another look at my precious, gawping at it, "It's just impossible." Tittering with little a many more shooks of his head and a shoulder he shrugged to show me twas indeed impossible but then, "Wait!" leaning to the sides, a brow he raised at my rear end- just to come on back from the quick visit of my rear and felling me his eye, "Nah! Can't there too!" with utter honesty he confesses.
"Why the fuck not? It's getting embarrassing for me now, as you might not had guessed there's a fuck ton of PEOPLE looking at me!" emphasis deeply on the 'people'.
"Yeah! I know!!" he nodded with little hint of satirical laughter, "There's a small chance I'd pull you out if they weren't here but-"
His reason for the hesitation now rang-,
"Oh come on! I don't swing my sword that way and fuck– does it matter for them lot?!" now twas sounding a tad strong and woefully domineering, "Hey-Hey?!" in my attempt of persuasion I called out to the crowd, "We're not gay okay? He's definitely not gay and me? I just had a swell session of bonking with a Kitty cat!–"
I then paused- halting the tongue, slowly my eyes shifted to Rip, "I made it sound very bad for me just now didn't I?"
Rip– whose lips drooled to the sides telling me, "Yes!"
"I mean- I just fucked the cat girl last night. Y'all saw her jumping off just then, that proves it right fucking there!" I shouted quick and fast turning back to the crowd.
"Get on with it already!" a man amongst the crowd hollered, "Sodomy is mankind's deep rooted nature." Twas clear now it was a Stars-Descent which as me and Rip heard- brought dread and gloom to our faces.
Gossips alone were tough and in here there's a video capturing option just with a thought to activate– This spelt doom for thine and for Rip he was now an advocate for the line, 'I'm not risking it!' also the line was clearly written on his face.
Then, only more utter refusal for Rip when another one shouted, "Just suck his dick already."
Then another one, "Yeah he'll probably come outta there." Worsening more now with what rang in the ear as an entendre of what comes after a session of a fellatio.
Rip with shades of gloom in his face, "This is where our friendship ends buddy!" he solemnly said.
"It fucking isn't!.... Rip? I am maybe trending already so please END MY FUCKING MISERY!" I fucking shouted- thine could no longer bore the pretense of being a confident nudist in the bright of day.
However more;
"Pull out!"
"Pull out!"
Chanted the crowd- an innuendo of sex, making Rip now- more of morest unwilling to help.
"You lot!" angry, I called to the pack of hungover descents in the crowd, "Stop gawking at us and deal with the burning over there. Seriously– is watching two men struggling to pull out more important then that?"
Blinking twice a set of dumb-ned eyes, I came to instantly noticed what I said, which invoked yet another shred of titters, "I just can't catch a break, I'm making it more worst right?" I told Rip.
And he nodding and eerily silent- in a flash quickly took far a step-back from thine, made more dramatic somehow by an unruly smoke of dusts coming from behind him, from behind the crowds.
"What the- fuuuck! Don't leave me alone, I feel like I'm almost out!" I reached a palm at him.
"Stop talking bud, please just shush." he told me with gloomy a face, "Just–" he turned around to see the crowds sniveling more at my every words.
Leaving me more desperate to be free from here and blast their cunt faces to oblivion, "Stop misunderstanding! If you're that into watching a porno just-," before any could titter more to any more misunderstandings this tongue failed not to spout, "Fuck it! You- You said you're super strong right? So just pull me out by the toe or something."
"I am strong but I need to rhyme about something….. right now I just-I can't do nothing."
"Oh for fuck's sake! Help!!"
I now called out to any.
But then in a flash, I saw as Rip was suddenly grabbed by the neck from behind, almost leaving his limbs behind-,
For there came a creamy coated centaur, clad with mighty full golden armor riddled with markings of his kinds and hooves, a lot of hooves- a fetish of hooves.
Nevertheless it was sparkling radiant with a great axe in it's back, it's human-half was mythical in all sense and it grabbing Rip by the neck was a mythical sight then.
And they were coming- To I, they were coming a stampeding fuck to I as Rip shouted, "Stop! Staphp!! I'm still a little sick!" with a face that clearly told- was fighting off a hurl, maybe tumbling and rolling for near a full minute took a massive toll- deservingly.
Reaching a hand armored with a mighty gauntlet- fore I could spoke any, it grabbed my leg and plucked me out the ground.
Thine afro did sure leave a crater behind and there we were, and then and again thine meaty pleasure-bringer swayed and dangled in full display but still the centaur saved thine glory.
"Tha~nk youuu~!" shaky as it galloped and what a bumpy ride the thing was, I could faintly see the blurry crowds due for it being a bumpy ride and as I squinted for hazily I saw– the three masked men standing close to where Rip was, 'I'll get you! Mark my words!'
Maybe this centaur took noticed of the men and played a hero for us,
Or;
It was on it's unstoppable way to it's cave to turn our poop door into a hollowed mess of flesh.