I will never understand him and I refuse to dwell on it any longer. It was foolish of me to have placed myself in such a vulnerable position of collapse. It was foolish of me to even try.
In the end, no matter how much I improve myself, he will always leave me.
"Can we finally proceed to Tourmaline Mountain?" Kox asked.
Crowley comically pointed at the once missing child, rushing to crush him against his side.
"Where the heck have you been, you disabled kid?!"
"I had no purpose to be in such a dangerous spot and Tomos told me to wait here until you arrive."
Crowley released Kox from his grasp, glaring at him.
"You're going to reason out that damned book again. I swear I'm going to—"
Before Crowley could even lay a finger on the turning pages, lightning shot out from the skies, electrocuting him and leaving the Hanuman on the overly cooked side.
"I knew you were going to do that. I knew that it would have been too late before I could warn you. Tomos knows all. Praise Tomos," Kox deadpanned, floating ahead of us.
Ziru picked up a twig lying on the ground and knelt beside the unconscious Crowley to poke him with it.
"Is he still alive?" Caleb asked.
"I think so," Ziru responded.
"Merde (shit)," Caleb sighed. "And here I thought I could save myself from dragging a banana-overfed beast."
The werewolf gently took my hand, sauntering forward to bend and lift Crowley's ankle.
Caleb gave me a tug forward. "Let's hurry before they catch up to us."
It was a long walk. Caleb continuously gave me worried glances. He wanted to say something but was opting to hold it back and stay quiet. As soon as Crowley regained consciousness, our pace became much faster but the air was refilled with more racket.
Fireflies lit our way. In addition, Kox's overly glowing book was providing much use for us.
"Lucian…" the werewolf hesitantly trailed.
His skin paled when his gaze lifted above my head.
"You may speak, furry animal."
It was raining.
"I know that you're upset about what happened but…you aren't alone. We're still here for you," he tried to comfort.
"I do not feel emotions such as upset. Would you please care to demonstrate?" I requested.
What gave him an idea that I was manifesting signs of sulking? Those kinds of feelings were irrelevant and a waste of a good carrot.
The droplets became frequent and heavier. It was raining but it was only on my spot. I stared up, finding a small puff of dark cloud above my head that was relinquishing the cool droplets of water.
This was only natural. There were no emotions involved.
I cleared my throat, removing my hand from his grasp.
"Let us proceed."
"He's definitely sulking…" Crowley murmured.
Only fools could assume such a thing from me.
Despite insisting that everything was in order even in my saturated state, Caleb was determined to change what he was seeing.
I did not get why he was trying so hard.
A series of loud thunders resounded that caused Ziru and Crowley to squeak and hide behind the unaffected Kox.
"Lucian, look!" Caleb exclaimed after having to retrieve a coconut from somewhere.
He slammed the coconut against his head, making the others flinch from the action. The werewolf maintained a twitchy smile.
"Never tried coconut juice? Go loco with coco!"
"Die you, idiot," Crowley ridiculed.
"I am not in the sipping state," I blandly replied.
Caleb rushed away, this time, he brought back a gelbvieh that was having twitchy movements.
"I'm planning to sell cooked meat that can stay edible even after fifty blue moons!" he advertised.
The gelbvieh released a "moo" and fluttered its little wings. Instead of soaring away, its legs gave out when its head twitched rather harshly to the side.
The werewolf panicked, trying to stand the gelbvieh back on its four legs, but failed miserably.
"I'll call it beef jerky!" he announced with pride.
Ziru sounded his applause, raising his hand to submit a question.
"Does it cause you to jerk with it once you eat it?"
Kox snorted. "Desperation can really take you to different lengths of futility."
"Please return that gelbvieh from where you abducted it. The world must be cleansed of meat-eaters," I spoke bluntly.
Caleb's shoulders slumped. I turned around, proceeding without them and with the rain cloud following me obediently.
"Wait up Lucian!" Caleb whined.
After a long and tiresome walk, the raincloud dissipated above me. We rested on the green grass, sensing the soreness on our feet. The dark sky was stained with a reddish-yellow color. The rays of sunlight reached through and spread luminesce. The stars slowly disappeared as orange turned to bright blue and dark gray clouds shifted to white.
"You're really soaked," Caleb commented.
"Here!" Crowley shouted.
He threw a small white towel at Caleb. The werewolf didn't have to inch his nose closer to be able to get the foul stench coming from it.
"What's wrong with you? I haven't used that yet," Crowley gruffed.
"It smells like a Hanuman," Caleb responded.
Crowley snatched the towel from his grasp.
"If you don't want it then just say so!"
"There's a stream nearby where we can clean ourselves," Kox told us. "We won't stray away from our main direction."
"I'm getting thirsty as well," Ziru whined.
With a couple more trees in the way, we arrived at the stream that Kox mentioned before. Caleb peeled my wet clothes, washing the cloth that Crowley let him borrow.
He rubbed me with the cloth from top to bottom. My clothes were hung on a tree branch for drying. Everyone else had their feet submerged into the running stream.
It was silent between the two of us as Caleb gingerly cleaned me. He still had so much to say judging from the worried expression on his face. I waited for him to speak.
"You…" he murmured. "I know how hard it is to be separated from someone you love so much. You feel helpless and alone no matter how surrounded you are. You want to be with them but there are just circumstances that won't let you have what you want. You become in denial because you can't accept the fact that they're gone. In the end, you push away the people who want to be with you because deep inside, you're saving a spot for the person you're waiting for to return."
"Enough," I told him. "I don't want to be discussed with the same things that would place me in a feeble situation. I am fine."
He flinched. I tried to leave but he grabbed my wrist to prevent me from going anywhere.
"Just let me stay by your side. That's all I ask."
Why do you try? Why do you want to be with me when in the end, you'll leave me too?
"Do what you wish," I replied.
We continued on with our journey as soon as my clothes got dried. There was a village that was evidently destroyed by a catastrophe from afar.
Caleb flashed me a sad smile before kneeling on one knee with his back facing me. He stretched his arms backward, waiting for something.
I tilted my head and raised my foot. I gave his back a hard kick, causing him to stumble forward and look at me childishly with teary eyes.
"Ow! Do you really hate me that much?"
Caleb stood up, struggling to touch the area where my sandal left a mark.
"I was offering you a piggyback ride!" he cried.
"I am not a pig so I do not think I am qualified for the ride," I reasoned out.
The others snickered as Caleb tried his hardest to convince me about this piggyback ride. With a few more whines on his part, I lowered my torso, wrapped my arms around his neck, and had my legs squeeze his sides.
I was no longer a royal ancient needed to rule a prestigious race.
I was no longer a scum created to rebel against the inconsiderate and unjust laws of the governing bodies.
I was now an oink—a pig to be exact.
Oink Oink Oink.
Bricks and parts of furniture were scattered everywhere. The trees and plants decayed; a vague rotten smell lingered around the area.
"How far ahead is the Tourmaline Mountain?" Crowley asked.
"It would take us another day if we don't take the Bête Noire field," Kox said.
"I've heard of that field. It's also referred to as the Nightmare field isn't it?" Crowley queried.
"Correct. One must have a strong mental state to be able to pass through the field alive."
"I can just jump through it," Ziru snickered.
"I'm afraid that won't be possible. You cannot cheat your way through the field."
"Pah! Who cares, it won't hurt unless you try," Crowley supported.
"Indeed, those are the words of the person who'll be wailing in agony later," Kox retorted.
"Don't be so hard on him; he hasn't tried it yet. It would be more amusing to torment him once he finally puts effort into caring," I added, gaining Kox's approval.
"Those are the words of a wise aishah."
Did he mispronounce my name?
"Oh please don't tell me this is the start of a tag team," Crowley groaned.
Caleb snorted. "You did this to yourself, you smelly monkey."
The Bête Noire was an ink-black grassy field, which would put a century old tree to shame with their gargantuan height. They smell like regular grass, but they didn't look like your regular pasture for a nice afternoon nap.
Crowley was starting to look anxious.
"So…wh– who'll go in first?" he stuttered.
"I vote for the person who won't get hurt unless he tries," I said.
"Yes, I second this. I hope once you try it, it will hurt twice as much as you expected," Kox added.
"No– Now wait just a minute! I was just joking. Can't you kids take a dumb—"
"Just get in roujin (old man)!" Ziru groaned, kicking him inside.
Ziru might look very small and dainty, but his legs were no laughing matter, especially with all the jumping he did daily. Crowley will be in a whole different level of physical pain right about now.
The field released dusty particles that created a misty screen once Crowley was in. Ziru went right after and Kox soon followed.
"Stay close, please," Caleb requested, looking very stern and at the same time, very tense.
"You left me with no choice," I replied monotonously.
With how he was squeezing me against him and with my face squished against his cheek, people might think that we were two heads in one body.
Caleb charged inside while dragging me with him. The others were nowhere to be seen and they did not respond to Caleb's calls.
"It looks like we're on our own from now on," Caleb murmured.
"Where could they be?"
The werewolf made an abrupt stop, releasing me from his tight and protective grasp. I raised my eyes, finding him staring up ahead. I saw nothing but an endless field of tall grasses. His body trembled in great severity, fear consuming his entire being.
What could be causing such fright?
"Caleb, what is wrong?"
"Claude? No, stop!" he shouted.
Intense rage flashed in his eyes. His arms transformed into claws. He leaped, slashing the grass ahead.
Caleb released shivering breaths. He fell on his knees in great despair. He grasped the grass that he had shredded with his claws.
"Mama…mama get up. You have to get up!" he cried.
His uncontrollable sobs rose in great volume. With his body still racking with sobs, he whirled around, presenting me with eyes of bereavement.
"We– we have to go, Conall. We have to get out of here!" he yelled at me. He grabbed my hand, hauling me through the fields.
I listened while he wept and realized bit by bit how…inconsiderate I was. He kept on savagely attacking the grasses as if they were the monsters of his past. He turned around after a loud and agonized gasp and carried me in his arms.
"You're going to be okay Conall. You're going to be fine. Big brother won't leave you. I won't…" he assured.
Caleb's face was filled with sorrow. His tear-stained expression told me how much of a stranger he was to me. I didn't know the pain he was living through yet I promised him that I would protect him with all my power.
The werewolf tripped on his feet. I landed on my buttocks. His chin trembled while staring at the empty space before us.
"Papa?" he blurted and reached out. "You can't make me leave. I can't do that. Where would I go?"
He lowered his torso down on the ground; his claws were tightly clenched.
"I have nowhere else to go…" he whimpered.
I gently placed my hand on the back of his head and stayed like this until his sobbing subsided.
I had already unclasped my belt and attempted to grow other plants that would put away this grassy labyrinth of trickery, but they keep on growing back. The plants that I tried to grow withered in an instant, proving my power to be ineffective.
"Lucian?" Caleb whispered.
"Have you finally regained sanity?" I questioned.
My hand slowly dropped once Caleb sat up. He caught my wrist, sniffing my palm that brought him relief.
"I had a nightmare of the night I lost my family."
He was trying his best not to break down the second time. My gaze softened. I let my hand slip under his jaw. He leaned against my touch.
"Your family must have been great people."
Caleb shut his eyes, resulting in more tears fleeing.
"Yeah…they really were."
His head fell on top of my shoulder. His arms loosely wrapped around my form.
"I really miss them."
We remained in that position until my body couldn't hold his chunky weight anymore. We could have been mistaken for stone statues for the length of time we stayed there.
"Will you help me search for a place?" I asked him.
"Where do you want to go?" he weakly asked back.
The idea was sudden.
I didn't even think twice about it. I just wanted to find it.
"I want to search for a place where I can build a home for people who have lost theirs."
Anyone could stay and call it theirs.
Caleb pulled back, wiping his swelling eyes with his wrist. He gave me his cheerful smile.
"I'll take you anywhere."
I stood up, offering Caleb my hand who seemed so surprised by my action.
"Then please take care of me."
I will find it.
I will find the place of my dream.