McQueen and Bronson shut the door behind me as I step inside the room. Once inside, my body falters and I slump against the door, heart pounding. I feel sick. My body lurches and I rapidly crawl into the bathroom. Body shaking and convulsing as the sickness expels from my body. I lean back, taking in rapid breaths as I try to calm my racing heart. I feel my body shake as I flick a metal knob, watching the water spin as chill bumps shoot up and down my body. Slowly, I stand and rub my arms, trying to smooth the bumps out as I walk over and lean against the counter. That was terrible. Turning on the water, I begin to take drinks and sloshing water around my mouth, attempting to get the burn and taste from my throat and mouth. As I lean back up, I see my reflection.
"I don't think I should eat that much ever again." I mutter as I turn off the water and slowly walk back into the room. I run my hand on the edge of a giant, fluffy bed. The blanket is soft and sleek as I slowly sit on it. I look around the room, the high ceilings and the white ornate walls tower over me. My eyes lower as I run my hands over the the deep red blanket. The shade changes with each stroke, if I go up, it becomes lighter, if I go down, it becomes darker. "So soft." I whisper and something in the floor by my feet catches my attention. "My bag." I lean down and grab my bag. Looking inside I find the journal Joe made me. Pulling it out, I run my fingers across the cover and my heart sinks a little. "Joe."
My voice I quiet and faint as I begin opening the journal, turning pages and seeing the uneven stitches that he must have done to keep the pages together. A smile forms on my face as his words echo in my head, "every detail, write every detail". I walk over to the desk by two large, glass doors as I hold the journal. After setting it on the desk, I pull out the chair and sit down. After opening a few drawers, I find a pen and take a deep breath before opening the first page and beginning to write.
Dear Joe:
When you gave this to me, you said I had to have every detail written to share with you, so I only thought it appropriate to address them to you as well. I believe the last time I wrote was when you taught me how, so please let me apologize for how terrible it may look. Yesterday, I didn't ride a helicopter, rather something they call a hovercraft, and then I rode a magnetic hover train. I haven't gotten much rest since I left, but I guess I hadn't slept much before then either, not since I found out I was going to come here.
Since being here, I have met a few interesting people. The first were the people here to make me look nice. They are a family, a husband, wife, and daughter. The husband, his name is Charlie and he is the one who will make my outfits. He has smile wrinkles, they remind me of yours. His wife, Sicily, she is the one who does my hair. She has a gentle touch and always has a gentle smile on her face. Their daughter, Cora, she does my makeup. Although they have only been nice, well not really the daughter. Even though they have been nice, I still feel unsure about them. I just don't understand the look in Charlie and Sicily's eyes, it's one I've never seen before. I also feel bad for them, because they are the best in the entire nation and they have been assigned to an impossible task; making me look nice.
The next interesting people are my two guards. Bronson and McQueen. Bronson reminds me of a block, a giant beefy block, and McQueen is like a pointy thing. He reminds me of the needles one uses to sew and make clothes. Everything about them seems to fit the way they speak... well except Bronson. His voice is higher than one would expect.
The last person is a girl who is also in the process. Her name is Reena, and she is rather loud at times. I believe she often says whatever she is thinking, which is typically rude, but not too me so much. She seems like she is trying to be nice, but like the others, I just don't trust it. I will say she showed me a lot of really good food, but I think I ate too much, because I got sick. Now that I think about it, I have never eaten so much that I've gotten sick before.
Anyways. Tonight, I am supposed to meet the guys-
My heart beat races at the thought, and I feel my stomach grow that sickly feeling once again. Gripping the pen tighter, I continue to write, hoping that writing it out will help me through the foreign feeling.
Tonight, I am supposed to meet the guys, and I am not entirely thrilled about it. For the past week or so, I have met more people that I would have every thought I could.
My body gets the funny bumps again.
I don't want to meet anymore people Joe, let alone them. No one wants me here, and even though some are nice, I know that most just want to seem like the hero.
My face grows hot as my chest begins to heave slightly.
I want to be home, I don't want to be here.
I drop the pen and stand from the chair as my breathing feels harder and harder to slow down. I rapidly look around the room, the corners of my eyes have a dark and fuzzy look to them. Looking around, the set of curtained double doors catches my eyes. I lunch for them and quickly yank them open. The scene before me is quick to make my mind and the rest of the craziness stop dead in it's tracks.
Blue. A blue sky, with slight wisps of white clouds dusted around, blends seamlessly into a giant body of blue water. A slight breeze comes up and the smell of salt envelops my senses. Salty water. Salt water? The ocean! I slowly step out onto the small landing, grabbing holding of the railing in front of me as I stare out.
"Oh, Joe I wish you could see it." My voice blends into the breeze, perhaps carrying the whisper too him right this very moment. I imagine it twirling and spinning across the waves as it finds its way to him home and knocks on his door. Wait, has he seen it before? He does travel an awful lot. "Just in case." I say as I step back into the room and pick up the pen.
Joe, I just saw the ocean for the first time. At least I think that is what it is. It is blue, and it smells like salt, like how some of the books you showed me said. Truthfully, I was feeling overwhelmed, the feeling has been happening a lot lately, most especially today. I know I made a promise to give this all a try, so I will try, but I'm not sure how long all of this will last anyway.
I hear a crash from the door, and a breeze blows the curtains as the salty smell fills the room. I smile slightly as I write out one last thought.
I guess it won't be too bad as long as I can see the ocean. Interestingly enough, the color of it matches your eyes.
I close the book and walk back over to the bed. I ease myself down, laying so my body faces the open doors and I can see outside. Ever now and again, a crash is heard below, and it feels as if it were singing a song. My body and eyes grow heavy as I stare ahead, until soon, the blue sky is replaced with the black of weary sleep.
"Get out of here!" A voice screams in the middle of darkness. "I don't want you here, get out!" Flashes of light and heavy breathing mixes with the shrill voice of a woman. "I hate you!" I stand in front of a door, the woman's voice is behind it. "Don't you see we never wanted you?!" She screams from behind and I reach out my hand to knock. "Get away from us you monster!" She screams and I knock. Silence and then I knock again. Still silence follows.
*knock, knock*
Silence.
*knock, knock, knock*
Silence.
*knock, knock, kno-"
The door rips opens an a woman's face, a face that looks like my mother, flashes red, almost as red as blood as she screams at me. "Get out, get out, get out!"
My body lurches forward as my chest heaves up and down with heavy breaths. Looking around, I find myself in an unfamiliar place. My mind begins racing as I scan the giant room not understanding where I am. A crash sounds and my head snaps to double doors. Immediately, I remember and begin to calm down. That's right, I am in the marriage process.
*knock, knock*
My head snaps to the door and I slowly crawl out of bed, careful to not make a sound. "Miss. Burks." A voice calls and I hurry over recognizing the precise tone. I open the door to an emotionless McQueen as he stares at me down the bridge of his pointy nose. "Ah. There. You. Are." He says as he steps into the room. "Your. Team. Will. Be. Here. Mo.men.tar.i.ly." He glances around the room and I nod as I walk over to the desk and stand in front of the journal watching him intently. He peers at the open doors and then looks to me. "Next. Time. Please. An.swer. Quick.er. Or. I. Will. Have. No. Choice. But. To. Break. Down. The. Door." He turns on his heels and quickly leaves the room. As soon as the door shuts, I grab the journal and try to find a hiding place for it.
I go to place it under the pillow, but think about how they may have people clean. I try my best to stay quiet as I look around the room for a hiding spot. As I walk, I hear a creak underneath a rug at the foot of the bed. I squat and lift up the rug, pushing on the flooring until I hear a creak. It echoes out loudly, and with a grimace I put the rug back on top of it. Too loud to put it there. I walk around the room again when another knock sounds from the door. My heart rate does a tiny jump as I look around and see a large painting hanging over the desk. I run over and feel the back of it. Too small. Another knock and I look around and around in the room, until out of the corner of my eye, I see a tall wooden array of shelves, with various books in it. I hurry over and tuck it inside the shelves. Just until I find a better place. Hurrying to the door, I open to see Charles, Sicily, and Cora standing there waiting.
Sicily and Charles walk in with small and gentle smiles as Cora just follows behind, a sour expression on her face. "Good afternoon dear." Sicily says as she walks into the bathroom, carrying a large bag with her. "I hope you are excited for tonight! You finally get to meet the men who are trying to steal your heart!"
"All you have to do is go to the market if you want the heart of a pig." Cora mutters as she, also carrying a large bag, walks to a corner and begins setting things up.
"What did you say?" Charles mutters as Cora dips her head and shakes it. His eyes narrow slightly, but he quickly turns them to me as he smiles. "Anyway! Miss Burks, I have a wonderful dress for you to wear!" He exclaims as he opens up a large bag. Inside, another black dress, but this one seems longer. "I took the liberty of making alterations based on how you felt in the first dress today."
"Do I have to get a new dress every time?" I ask as he lets out a little laugh.
"Well no, but don't you want too?" He says as he begins taking the dress out and showing it to me. "This one is very special, because not only are you meeting the men, but you are also going to be introduced to the rest of the nation tonight through the broadcasting." He gives me a smile as he walks away and begins talking to Cora about something.
The dress is long. The bottom of it fluttering out with soft tool. I touch it and the softness of the fabric sends a fear that my hands may be too rough to touch it. The top of the dress is a dark lace, with slightly silver undertones to it, that goes out onto the long sleeves. It's so beautiful.
"Well? Do I need to make changes?" He asks as he begins in different sized boxes.
"I think it is beautiful." I say and he lightens up as he sets the boxes down. "I just think I will ruin it." His face goes slightly hardened at that as he turns to look at me. "This deserves to be on someone beautiful." His shoulders straighten and his mouth opens as if to speak.
"Come on now dear, I'm ready to start on your hair." Sicily calls from the bathroom and I walk my way to her. She directs me to a chair and slowly begins to work.
This time, she puts a lot of different things in my hair. She sprays funny smelling stuff on it as she brushes and pulls. Her voice hums a tune as she goes. I listen to her, and a part of my heart begins to ache, as my mind turns trying to place what I am hearing, because I have heard the tune before. She turns the chair and I watch her in the mirror. Her hair is pulled into a tight bun, small splashes of gray in her hair. On her ears a two shiny orbs of white.
"What are those?" I ask, and her eyes flick to see where my gaze is focused on. "In your ears."
"They are pearls." She says and I tilt my head. "Keep it straight dear." She pushes my head back and I straighten my back.
"Pearls?"
"Yes." She says and her eyes go back to my hair. "They are created from a clam." She says leaning in and pinning something in place. "When something foreign enters the clam's mouth. When it goes into their mouth, they cover it and conceal it to protect themselves creating something strong." Her eyes meet mine in the mirror. "It reminds me of people and their hearts in a way." She says and sprays more stuff.
"How?"
"Well, when we feel like something may hurt us, we often cover ourselves. Creating a hard shell or wall while simultaneously trapping the hurt within us." She turns me and stares at my face as she fixes small strands of hair. "It's sad really, how much people do not realize that."
"The hurt." I ask and she leans back, peering at my face. "What happens to it?"
"Well, in the oysters, it creates this beautiful pearl." She takes off her earring and sets it into my hand. "Sometimes it can happen in people as well."
"Sometimes?"
"Well yes." She says as I gently touch the pearl before handing it back to her. She begins putting it back into her ear as she sighs. "Most times, people build the walls and they become hateful to all, shoving everyone away because they hold that hurt in their hearts until they die. Others are able to expel it, and they become more beautiful and stronger because of it." She looks at my face and then touches a loose strand on my forehead, tucking it into place. "But that does not mean there is no hope for those who cannot expel it themselves." She says and her eyes stare into mine. "Sometimes, even the oysters need a helping hand. So the moral of the story is, those who never trust others are the ones who never expel the hurt."
Her eyes stare into me and I notice her hand shaking slightly as she touches my my shoulder. "You look just like her." She whispers, her voice shaky like her hands. I go to ask when Cora pops in.
"Hey I have to get her makeup done." She calls and Sicily's face shifts to the simple smile it normally has.
"Perfect! We just finished." She says and gives me a brief bow before turning her back and cleaning.
"Hurry up." Cora says standing at the door. I quickly jump down and walk towards Cora. Looking back, Sicily is humming the tune once more, and although the smile is on her face, her eyes have no such glimmer.
***