The corridors of the mansion were busy as usual, filled with the servants fulfilling their noon duties. Yet now, as they surrounded us two, casually walking with each other, they seemed like a hoard, so many, so crowded. All of them seeing, watching us with their… Suspicious and cold glares.
Smiling to my master, welcoming him, when he passed by them, their gazes changed when they stumbled upon me. The smiles were different then. The fake muscles twitching under their skin, I felt a rotten joy coming from their greetings. Eyes ready to perceive what they want, judge, and declare their own ecosystem, the world of servants under the god, who was the duke.
I could hear them whisper among themselves, while they watched me following the duke. Their ignorant looks changes to one's more hurtful than as if I didn't exist. So, instead of walking behind the man, I decided to walk by his side. To not see them make these looks anymore. But my head wouldn't shift up, glaring into the marble floor, I still felt the unpleasant glares. When one think changes for better… The other collapses in its place.
•••
The fresh breeze of air swirled in my nose, as the smell of the dominating Sun rose outside. Bright rays were getting warmer with everyday, the honeyed fragrance of the blooming flowers becoming more intense. The world was slowly changing, spring surrounding every corner of the garden. Colors filling the surroundings, it was a really pleasant sight, making me cover the uncomfortable moments from the inside.
In this sun, stood the son of the night. His dark-brown wavy hair, like the bark of the old oak tree behind the mansion. His black, lost eyes shined, reflecting the heavenly blue sky. The warmth greeting his skin, he seemed to enjoy that weather too. I wondered, what thoughts lie behind these mysterious eyes. What is my future in the mind of this man.
They turned down, on me. Devouring me whole, the darkness of theirs, even in the daylight, shivers went down my spine.
"You seem sad. Why is it?" — He asked.
Despite so many answers that would be so obvious, he still seeks for one. Right now, it was the servants mad glares that made me like this, but should I tell him? Should I make myself a pitiful and miserable creature, affected by anything?
From the loneliness of my heart… Maybe I… Want to be taken care of?
Can he… Take care of me?
Do I have… Anyone else in this world that can do this?
Why is there… A longing feeling in my heart… An empty hole… That I'm so desperate to fill…
"The servants… They've always ignored me… It makes me sad, that I have no one to talk to." — My eyes, staring into his, felt teary all of a sudden.
His lips tightened, their color becoming faintly paler. My genuine sadness, it was engraved in my face, the feeling of abandonment still hurting, despite him acknowledging me after such a long time.
His black, miserable now eyes. He… Was the one who ignored me first.
Am I not the wife of his dearest friend?
He apologized, explaining that I would become resentful if I remember what happened, but… Could that justify him for treating me as he did? Deserting… me? To find meaning only in chores and wandering in the infinite gardens of this place?
Why is it, that it took such a long time to finally break and admit, that I am no mere servant, a human to be longer ignored?
I want him to… compensate me for my loneliness… He was responsible for…
Is this… The resentment he meant? Am I… That kind of a person?
My eyebrows frowned, at the thought of myself.
Who am I?
But before my mind could start digging deeper, into the locked feelings inside of my heart, my sight was surrounded with a warm shadow. The sweet smell of a flower, which name I couldn't remember. Soft fabrics of his clothes touching my face, and the beating of his heart, I could feel with my lips. His long fingers swirled around my hair strands, the other arm holding me closely.
"From now on, you won't be lonely anymore."
He tightened the grip around my back.
"I'll give you all of the happiness you want."
The wind softly whistling in my ears, These words of his were so silent, I could say I imagined them in my head. My heart started beating faster, with my cheeks becoming boiling hot.
He is… So close.
He speaks… Words like these…
His chest… Is so wide…
His smell… Is so suffocating…
His charming black eyes, glaring at me, each time with a new emotion, they were strangely magnetizing. How good, it's not them I see right now, or this weird sensation in my heart would make me crumble before him.
I hope he keeps his promise. Don't abandon me anymore. Make me the happiest in the world. My heart is eager for this. This is… Nice.
I want more of this feeling.
"Do you feel sad anymore?" — He pulled his chest away from my face, to see the expression that was hidden, buried into his body?
My face was all red from embarrassment, my lips pursed from the pleasant moment.
I nodded, not looking up. I couldn't see whether he smiled or not.
The sun peeked out from a small group of clouds that have covered it for a while. Making my vision bright, I noticed on the side a resonating patch of yellow and white flowers. Having glared there for a second, from above his wide arms, he noticed my interest in it.
"They are so bright… Do you want to get closer?" — He asked, to stop this awkward silence. I nodded again.
The patch of flowers was stretching on a wide area of the land. The flowers in the color of the sun, with their petals like glorious rays. Haven't noticing this size of a beautiful place earlier, I wondered how could have these appeared so suddenly, in just a few days? The bees flying above them, their buzzing created an illusion of a crowded city… So loud… And familiar… Little bugs moving in every direction…
Have I been to a place like this before?
"Do you like them?" — His tone had a glimpse of curiosity.
I nodded again. Their smell, color, vibrance, shape, feeling. Everything was beautiful, things each flower possess, but different in many ways. Still, lovable.
"Daffodils. I ordered to plant them. I'm glad you enjoy their sight. I will ask to decorate your room in these."
"No!" — I suddenly yelled, to reject this idea. But my voice was louder than I intended to.
His expression changed to the one he always bore, when he was unsure of something. Just like the last time, when he confessed the truth about me.
Frowning his eyebrows in a disheartening way, I immediately explained myself:
"Dalius must have worked so hard to plant all of these… And taking them so I could just admire them for a week… It's not worth their lives…" — It was the truth.
I'd rather enjoy them more in the sunny and lively garden, than in the closed room of mine.
But what concerned him more than the lives of the flowers, was the name I spoke.
The light in his black eyes faded, his face losing all of its emotions.
"Who?" — A neutral voice asked.
He wanted to act like this was nothing, a normal question, but I couldn't not see the muscles in his face twitching.
Doesn't he know… His servants?
"Dalius, the only gardener. He always took care of the plants here."
But his black eyebrows only frowned deeper.
"…There has never been a man with such name working here."
…What?
But… He was the only one that would exchange any words with me… He introduced himself… I wouldn't remember… Wrong… Right?
I has been a few days… Since I've last seen him…
What… Could have happened to him?
The duke's confused face… He seems like not knowing a man with such a name at all… An unknown man working on my land… I would be surprised too… But, maybe if I describe him…
"It's lunch time. Let's head back." — He firmly grabbed my arm.
His smile, suddenly appearing before my sight, it made me forget about it. The smile brightening on his face, the face of the lost servant dissolved in my mind.
We walked back, me asking him what are we going to eat. Lately, I've been craving on sweets, more than usual. I hope that I won't get fat from eating all of the delicious food, the kitchen serves to my master.
——
But in his mind, there were no delicious goods. Listening to the woman's joyful voice, he only hoped for one thing.
That her happiness would last forever.