It's neither cold nor warm in this deep, dark abyss of nothingness. All my senses were gone as if they had never been there in the first place. I couldn't even feel the skin on my body, smell the scent of sweat, the succulent sugars of an apple I had while I was in the Tower of Strength, nor can I hear my heartbeat that would usually pound my eardrums. Truly, all my senses have been numbed, and worst of all, I have no idea where I am. The only thing it left me with was time. Too much time.
How long have I been drifting in the darkness? I can move my body, but I cannot tell if it was moving or not. My body feels as light as air, but it feels like I'm wading through cement on the verge of hardening. When I felt like moving around was pointless, I just stood still and recollected my thoughts. All I remember was that Tisha placed a hand on my face, and the next thing I knew I was here… Wherever here was, I have no idea.
Ah… Wait... She did say that the final challenge will occur from within. Am I inside my body? Or, more specifically, my mind? If so, then why do I feel or see nothing? This abstract and helpless feeling… It's similar to whenever I dream at night. There are times that whenever I tried to run in my dreams, it would feel like I'm not moving at all like I was wading through a pool of molasses. Heck, I couldn't speak or hear my voice. I would feel no pain even if I were struck by something, and this experience right now is just like my dreams.
Wait a minute… Dreams… Maybe, just maybe… If I try hard enough, I could manipulate this mind space to whatever I want. Will that solve my current problem? Wouldn't hurt to try. If completing this challenge was this simple, then Tisha must've severely underestimated me. Either that, or there is more than meets the eye.
Mentally taking note of that, I thought of whatever came to mind first, and that would be to feel my own body. The instant I thought of that, I could slowly feel the nerves of my fingers. Then, it was my feet as I curled them within my shoes. Next, I could move my arms and legs, and finally, everything was completely functional. The sound of my breathing, the smell of the air that had no distinguishable scent, and even the little twitching of my pinkie fingers were calming.
"That was so uncomfortable. I never want to experience that again…" I muttered. It was like I was never there in the first place… As if I was just another dark spot in the shadows. If I hadn't thought about this being like a dream, I might've gone crazy. But the job isn't finished yet. I must find out how to beat this final challenge. If I don't, then it's possible that I'll be stuck here forever. What am I supposed to even do here? Even when I open my eyes, I still can't see shit since there isn't ANYTHING here at al-
My question was soon answered when the space in front of me shimmered. What came after was a small white light the size of a pea. After a few seconds, it doubled in size and would continue to do so until it was large enough to fit two people if one were to go inside. Almost like it was a portal, beckoning me to come forth.
Alas, since I'm a skeptical person and would tend to avoid anything remotely dangerous If I could so, I didn't outright walk in. Yet I felt a tugging sensation from the portal itself. I tried to fight against the unseen force, but it grew too powerful to resist, and I was pulled toward the white light as if a huge hand had just grabbed hold of me. Once inside the portal, what used to be a dark space only filled with blackness was now replaced with blinding white.
Usually, a light of this magnitude would burn a person's retina, but for some reason, mine wasn't harmed. Since there were no negative effects and my body was fine, I hastily looked around the new space. Right now I was floating through the air quickly. The experience felt like I was riding on a rollercoaster at top speed. My hair, which was already a bird's nest, was fluttering rapidly from the wind pressure.
"Okay… Where the hell are you taking me?" I thought to myself. I'm being led through the nose inside my own mind space and I haven't a clue of where I'm going. I tried envisioning myself back at home, but the space around me wasn't warped to that location. Either I don't have full control of my mind space, or the final challenge is forcing me somewhere else.
All I could do was wait until my arrival. It didn't take long for me to reach my destination, and it was one I hoped to never confront face-to-face ever again. Suddenly, my body stopped moving as I was frozen in place. I had to stop my head from snapping by holding it in place with both of my arms. I let out a small groan from the pain.
Wait, pain? I thought this was supposed to be a similar experience to my dreams... Would that mean my beliefs from before are inheritably wrong? Is the final challenge treating this place as if it was real life? Yes… That must be it! I can't think of anything else that would make as much sense as that!
Another swirling mass of light appeared in front of me. A new portal has just opened up, and once again beckoning me forth. Knowing that resistance is futile, I willed my body to float forward as I entered the portal. Once I was through the portal, the scenery around me did a complete one-eighty. I was in a dimly lit room with the only illumination coming from a nightlight plugged into an outlet. I was hovering slightly above the floor and found myself in the middle of the room. When looking around, I instantly recognized where I was. My throat tightened, and my breath grew ragged as I scanned my surroundings.
A twin-sized bed that had light pink wrinkled sheets with a floral design was resting near the corner of the room. Next to it was a white nightstand that had a tall lamp with a single bulb hiding behind the covering. The windows were covered by a long white curtain, and near the window was a dresser that had a circular mirror. On the left side of the wall that was near the nightstand was a closet containing dresses of various colors, shoes on a gray rack, and a black backpack. This sight was all too familiar.
"T-This is my room from when I was a kid…" I squeaked. While I glided across the room, I noticed a clock over my nightstand. The hour hand was on seven while the minute hand was on three. A rhythmic clicking sound was heard as each second passed by as I stared at the machinery.
"…I see what's going on now," I murmured. It was seven fifteen PM. Around this time I would be on my bed, reading a book I would pick out from the school library. The fact that I'm not here around this time, and the fact that the final challenge of the Tower of Strength is happening within my mind, I knew what was going to happen from now on.
"Alright then, bring it on. Using my childhood trauma against me isn't going to work. I had twelve years to heal. The scars are still there, but they don't sting as much compared to the past."
I twirled my body around to see the bedroom door ajar. A funnel of yellow light was seeping through the crack. From beyond the door, I could hear the whispers of two high-pitched voices in the hallway. Taking a deep breath and steeling my resolve, I hovered over to the door. Since I'm akin to a ghost, I effortlessly phased through it.
Now out of my bedroom, I was in a tight hallway of peach-colored walls. To my left was another room, and this one was open too. The pair of voices I heard was coming from within, and the light inside was turned on. Doing the same thing I did before, I phased through the door and entered the room. It was the same size and layout as mine, but this time the twin-sized bed was stashed in front of a window. Facing the bed was a small desk with a little gray chair, and on that chair was a small, brown-skinned boy with little to no hair on his round head. Standing over him was a girl that was shy of nine years old with curly black hair. Both kids had matching pajamas- the boy was wearing red and black plaid while the girl had blue and black. A hard lump was forming in my throat, making it difficult to speak. I could even feel some tears forming.
"Lala, how do you solve these problems?" The boy asked, tapping his pencil on a sheet of paper that had a bunch of math problems on them.
"Isaac, we went over this a million times!" Laila hissed at Isaac, clearly annoyed with the boy. "Two times two is four while four times three is twelve. Do you even study your time's table?"
"Studying is boring! It makes me want to sleep…" The boy groaned.
"No sleeping until you finish your homework! Mummy and daddy asked me to help you even though I didn't want to in the first place. If I leave you alone, you'll just snitch on me and get me into trouble."
"I like it when you teach me. Mummy and daddy's explanations make it hard to understand…" Isaac turned his head to face his sister. At the look on his face, the girl smacked her face as she stared at her brother with contempt.
"I should be reading my book right now, but I'm stuck here helping you instead. I was just getting to the interesting bits too…"
Boom!
Both siblings' heads snapped at the sound of something crashing, locking their gazes at the door.
"What was that?" Isaac asked his sister.
The sister shook her head. "…I don't know."
The pair slowly crept toward the door together and poked their heads through the crack. I silently watched the both of them mumble to themselves. They couldn't see or hear me. I can't even touch anything around me either, so I was just a spectator. A spectator that was watching her life rewind to her dark past in real-time.
Isaac and little me agreed with each other to go find their parents and ask what was wrong. The kids hurried out the door and ran out of the hallways, looking for their parents.
"…And so it starts."
This was the moment where it all began. The moment when Isaac and I would witness a gruesome scene, a scene that no kid… No… Where no one should have to go through. A scene that would stick with us for the rest of our lives. The fact that I have to replay these events again is a cruel fate.
"PUT YOUR HANDS UP!" A stern voice roared in anger.
"W-Who are you?!" A feminine voice spoke out in confusion.
"What do you want from us?" A deep voice replied calmly.
When I tried to leave the room to watch the events unfurl in front of me yet again, something deep within me stopped me. A nagging sensation advising me to stay put. A voice telling me if I truly wanted to see what would happen next. Pain deep within my heart was slowly bubbling again. A familiar but unwelcome pain.
"…Shut up," I mumbled under my breath. I meant it when I said this trauma won't affect me that much. I had time to heal, and it was finally time to see the results in action. It was time to see whether I moved on from the death of my parents… Or if I was still stuck in the past. The mantra that I have been repeating to myself for years was replayed over and over in my head. A mantra that Isaac and I tell ourselves whenever we face a challenge. A mantra that our mom tells us whenever we face hardships.
"All we can do is move forward."
If you don't move forward, you won't make any progress. No progress means that it will take longer to achieve whatever we strive for. Taking the first step is something our family doesn't shy away from.
"Phew…"
It only took me a minute to mentally prepare myself once more as I rushed out of Isaacs's room, determined to see this thing through.