I'm eyeing up the cocktail list, sitting on one of the stools. Ross returns from wherever he has been and sits the other side of me.
"Rach do you wanna go halves on a pitcher and then we can just share it" I ask her.
"Good thinking" she smiles at me.
"What cocktail do you want and don't say strawberry daiquiri" I ask her.
I look over at her, at just her not Jay. I look through him. He's an animal. Not sure what his game is now. Trying to make me jealous would only work if I gave a crap.
"You wanna choose it?" She asks somewhat preoccupied by Jay biting her lip.
I give up and order.
"Can I get a pornstar martini pitcher" I smile at the barman.
He leans into me, much to Matty's distaste. He asks if we want two separate glasses and I nod.
"Yes believe me I'll be sharing it" I laugh. He fiddles with his lip ring pausing looking at me.
Ugh guys.
I pay, I don't actually intend on Rach paying me half.
"Ah Tay it was my round" she says to me.
I pour her a glass and then my own.
I also ordered Ross another jack and coke without asking him and Matty a single one. He doesn't protest. I didn't bother with Jay after all he doesn't exist right now. No matter how much I want to stare at him.
I drink, and keep drinking. Ross is kinda quiet and I don't want to dive into that can of worms right now. So I sit quietly next to him. Matty has his arm around me, casually.
The bartender seemingly bored comes by and offers me some sweets for my drink. I actually genuinely smile and take some and he goes off again.
"Can't take you anywhere babe" Matty laughs cheekily.
"Maybe I should up the PDA" he asks me laughing.
I turn too look at him and realise I'm drunk. Like good and drunk, still just about in control. It's this drink. We've drunk a lot.
I brush his knee reaching up his thigh and smirk.
"Please" I say to him.
He smiles, "Taylor, are you drunk?" he teases me.
Rach laughs.
"Yeah that's never been a problem before. Please Matty" I ask him.
He steps down from his stool and faces me on mine.
I lean back a little on the bar.
"What do you want baby" he asks me.
I bite my lip now that's more like it.
Rach is smiling as I look over at her.
"I'm not giving you a lap dance that's off bounds" he smiles.
"Ah that's a shame I'll give you another one back" I wink.
"You know you want to see Tay dance in front of you again, that was pretty hot. Brought out my gay side actually" Rach laughs.
I lean into his ear.
"I want you right now" I tell him. And I kiss him seductively.
"You're seriously killing me" he says looking me up and down.
I pull him into me opening my legs slightly. And I kiss him. I get lost in his embrace.
"That's more like it" I tell him. He bites his lip.
"See. Not a bartender in sight" I laugh.
"Cheeky" he says.
The music gets seriously good. I'm definitely moving on my chair.
"How is it possible to do that and look hot sitting down" he asks me. He's still standing in front of me arms around my hips.
"Dance student, babe" I tell him.
And just in time Rhea and Malachi turn up. I get up and hug her.
"You looked fierce on the runway, I was literally cheering for you." I tell her.
"Ah Tay you were the star" she says to me and she's just my friend, I can tell she's not jealous or being bitchy.
"Ohh you wanna dance right" she says reading how drunk I am. I love her.
"That's one of the reasons I've been searching for you" she explains. Smiling.
Rach is in, which means Jay is too. Matty will not let me wander off again. We finish off the cocktail and join the crowd of people. I'm intent on dancing inappropriately with my man.
"Have mercy on me babe, you look incredible don't be way sexy I can't take it" he whispers.
"Are you kidding me, sorry no can do. You got with me deal with it" I tell him.
"Matty don't complain, I'll take her otherwise" Jay laughs.
"You will not babe" I tease, far to drunk to be mad anymore.
He laughs, "thought so".
I grind on Matty arm hooked around him, his hands are everywhere. I feel exactly how I wanted to. Close to him and sexy.
"Babe" he whispers.
"Yes Matty"
"I'm ugh going to rip this off when we get home" he laughs. His hand playing with my bra.
"Kim will kill you, how about you just take it off nicely, it's not that difficult" I tell him.
He laughs.
"I love you so much"
"I love you more."
"I'm gonna get you another drink, don't do anything I wouldn't" he tells me.
He kisses me before he goes.
Rach is dancing away with Pippa and the new guy. I notice.
Rhea is of course with Malachi. Ross is with me, and that's normal isn't it? We are friends. I'm too drunk to care about everything. Hey even Jay is around and I'm not fussed. Not even a smidge. I'm going to dance and do what I love bloody boys thinking they can get in the way.
Jay eyes me just a few times. I'm not counting. Or anything.
"I've not seen you dance until now" he says. I just laugh. Don't reciprocate I tell myself. Just ignore him.
"Don't start, I was actually tolerating you being around. Don't spoil it. Mr one night only" I laugh.
Sorry I can't help myself. He's a jerk.
He snorts.
"Gonna hold onto that one for a while aren't you" he asks.
"Oh that's a keeper" I tell him and smile.
"How do you do that" he asks.
"Do what" I ask him.
"So I'm dancing with Rach and she is actually quite a pretty girl you know. Not like your standard. But you know." He says eyeing my expression.
"So I'm dancing with her. I'm literally so close to her. But I'm looking over her shoulder at you. Thinking about you and how your body is moving and how you would look..." He says.
"See this is why you're an absolute animal Jay, you will say anything to me. No matter how much of a dickhead you sound" I tell him. I do love fighting with him.
"Are you okay" Ross asks me. I smile at him. My Ross. Always there for me.
"Jay, that's not my problem. You should be focusing on the girl in your arms" I say.
"And what if that was you" he asks.
"What for one night?" I laugh.
"Are you offended I only offered you one night" he says.
Maddening. He is maddening.
"I could offer you more" he looks at me intently.
"I'm taken" I tell him.
"Your body was not telling me that earlier" he says.
I scowl at him.
"You think I was being genuine?" I laugh.
"I know you were" he tells me and he places his hand on my back leaning into me. I stop breathing. I'm learning that drink is the problem, it makes me crave being close and intimate. And having lots of guys who are gorgeous around you is a recipe for disaster.
"All's I meant is you can have the best of both worlds. You can be greedy with me, I don't care if you only want me for sex. You have enough going to with..." he says eyeing Ross.
Ross is glaring at him. I take a good step away from Jay. I will not let him get to me. Proposition me all you want.
"You really are difficult" Jay says
"So are you" I retort.
"Babe ignore him" Ross says.
"Have fun speaking to Jen earlier did you Ross" Jay says.
"Fuck off." Ross says.
"She your back up plan then?" He adds.
"No she's a friend and she was upset" Ross defends himself eyeing me cautiously.
Lord he's an idiot. And he's too nice and forgiving. And not mine.
"A friend that you fuck to try and forget about Taylor" he says.
"I'm not fucking her" Ross says.
"Okay, we'll she's not with Brad anymore that can only mean you've stepped back in" Jay laughs.
I glance over at Matty he's still waiting looks like the barman is biased and serving the girls first. I consider walking off and asking Matty to take me home.
I decide to keep dancing. Ignore the guys, I just let them argue with each other. Not my problem.
"So did you or did you not promise to take her home?" Jay asks Ross. Grinning like a Cheshire Cat.
"I didn't say that" Ross argues.
"Why lie about it, this one here clearly will be leaving with Matty, I'm going to try and get with Rach. You get yours man" he says.
I roll my eyes. I realise now what Ross was quiet about earlier and glad I didn't ask myself. It is up to him who he gets with. I'm just left feeling confused.
He literally told me he loved me tonight, and then went and propositioned her. I can't judge him. I know that. I'm literally with my man in front of him. Why can't he just find somebody else, other than her. And why tell me he wasn't seeing her ever again and then do exactly that. Why bother lying?
"I really hope you treat Rach nice this time around" I say focusing on Jay.
"Oh I will don't worry Tay" he laughs.
Again I should not have said that.
"I mean with respect" I say.
"Oh that's what you want from me? Respect. And then you'll give in to me?" He laughs.
"Jay I won't ever be giving into you" I tell him and give him my best smile.
He accepts the challenge and smiles back.
I glance up at Ross and away again.
I don't trust him. I'm drunk and I don't want to fight with him, especially over something I shouldn't really be getting involved with. I mean how can I possibly tell him not to get with her? That's not fair.
"Tay I'm not..." he begins.
"Heard it all before. Ross, honestly like I said it's not fair for me to pass judgement on you. Although I do wish you'd just be honest with me" I tell him.
"I'm not going to stop being your friend because of it" I tell him. Then I resolutely face away from him.