After a long while, finally, Caelus let out a soft chuckle. He was slowly coming to his senses.
"I'm pathetic…" He whispered when they let go of each other. He weakly sat down beside the tree root. He looked up at Asahi but Caelus' gaze was too distant.
He didn't deserve Asahi's compassion. But that hug went over his soul. He knew that his soul was too broken, too twisted from all experiences he went through, that the System even blocked them out. And with that hug, he felt somehow healed. Like he was being purified. He felt he was given a second chance.
Asahi's hug was not meant for Caelus. It was for Sho Chad. The kid he killed and took over his body just to survive.
"You are not. I gave you too much responsibility. I'm sorry."
He was given a simple task, yet, he didn't achieve it.
"I tried… I tried so hard… but people were just going crazy…"
Caelus tried to narrate to Asahi what happened from the first Zone. He told him how it was going well at first. Everyone was safe and alive. But then another group invaded them, killing and massacre occurred. After that, he didn't know what happened to the group that got separated from them. Only a few were left inside and tried to get to do another task. He saw three others die before Alpha saved him. Alpha assured that Duke, Kali, Ross and Miya were alive, but he didn't see them anymore since he had been stuck at Sanctuary Shelter.
"Sanctuary Shelter?" Asahi's whiskey colored eyes that were close to orange glittered, as if he had found a treasure. With how pronounced his eyes were, one his mole under his left eye.
"It's the reason I came to find you. I know you. I'm sure you have saved a lot of people," he gazed over the camp. "And you would need a safe place. Shelters are that. No one can enter the Shelter Zone unless permitted by the owner. But right now, I need to find three more people before I can let your people enter. It's pretty complicated to run the shelter. There's a need for a law without loopholes so it won't get abused.
"I know you have a lot of people who you trust, but please check the person I'll recommend first. He's a lawyer. I'm sure he's better suited for the job."
"You've changed."
Caelus automatically flinched and looked away from Asahi when he said that.
He felt guilty.
Of course, he would've changed. He wasn't Sho. Although he was using Sho's memory, he knew he was far from him.
The original Sho would most likely ignore everyone, even when Asahi said something. Sho didn't want to interact with people. Sho didn't just trust anyone. He put a barrier around himself after losing his family and getting pushed around by the only relatives he had. He only trusts Asahi.
The only time he tried to open up was met with backstabbing, making him choose solitude.
Caelus said before that Sho would surely try to save people. Yet, he knew that it was his own excuse. He and Sho have different personalities.
Caelus couldn't turn away from anyone. He had a strong desire to survive, but a stronger desire to save anyone he could. If he saw someone who he sees as someone who needs help, he would help regardless of the situation.
It felt close to obsession at this point.
Was it because of his failure to save those he cherished? He didn't really know. He was just following his feelings.
He really felt guilty to the point of wanting to confess to Asahi that he wasn't Sho. That he transmigrated and took over Sho when the young man was supposed to just sleep. That he was the reason Sho had died. He wanted to confess everything, but knew the consequence was too great, he couldn't handle the backlash.
He needed Asahi, he also wanted to keep Asahi safe. And he won't be able to do it if he breaks their connection.
So, he swallowed his guilt and maintained his silence.
"... you even gained height. You're also bulkier than before. You don't have to worry too much. You're not the only one who's changed. I've also changed. But we needed this change. If we don't, we won't survive in this new world. It's good to know that you are starting to trust people around you. You need it more than before. Our survival this time would rely on our allies."
"..." He remained silent amidst Asahi's misunderstanding.
"Let's go to the shelter after we find the people you trust. We can't just barge into the Shelter if we don't have any set of rules. The current world now is too messed up. What we need is law and order to keep everyone sane and secure. I agree with your idea to establish the rules of the shelter first."
"Asahi…"
"Come on, let's head inside."
"I can't…" Caelus muttered before explaining to Asahi his situation. "I came with a guy. But I don't want my identity to be exposed. He thinks I'm around my twenties. I assumed that age because that's the only way I can be respected. I didn't reveal my identity. I'm calling myself Caelus. Also, we've encountered a problem before reaching here. If people know that Caelus and Sho are the same person, then I'm afraid the Dragon Riders might go after me and those important to me."
Asahi stared at Caelus for sometime, seeing Caelus' resolute gaze, he let out a sigh. "You've changed, but you still carry your old self."
"..."
"Haha. Don't get me wrong. This actually makes me happy. In a messy world like ours, seeing people change seems normal. Having someone you still recognize is something rare and assuring."
*Asahi… I'm sorry.* He was stabbed with guilt.
If not for him, maybe, Sho would still be alive. Sho's last memory was just too vague. In the back of his mind, he always thought he caused Sho's death. That's why he wanted to gain back his memories.
Maybe, the answers to his questions were there all along.
Why did someone have to die just for him to survive?
"I understand. You don't have to worry. I won't introduce you so that you won't reveal yourself to trouble. Although I've told people that my best friend is coming, I can just say that you know Sho. You can keep your disguise. But don't reject my invitation. Please, come to our camp. I want to show you that even in this messy world, we can still have our hope." Asahi flashed a glittering smile melting his worries away.
He smiled faintly. "Okay."
He followed the 177 cm tall guy while he started talking about information he had collected.
Caelus was awed by his knowledge. Things he didn't know were known by Asahi.
He even knew the legends that circulated on the Dragon Riders race.
Dragon Riders were born with the Dragons on their planet. And to survive, they had a long war between Dragons. After quite many years of suffering, they were finally able to kill Dragons. However, that didn't stop the Dragons from continuing the war. They see the Dragon Riders as weaklings. And so, war continued for thousands and thousands of years. Until every Dragon Riders were able to tame Dragons of their own.
Because of their shame with their previous weakling race, Dragon Riders erased their previous race and declared themselves Dragon Riders. Far more cruel than Dragons themselves.
Generations and generations were born after that, after two thousand years, the Dragon Riders normality was cruelty to any other. Trumple anyone who tries to oppose them. And slave them away.
For those two thousand years, only few knew about the previous history of Dragon Riders. Almost no one knew about what their previous race was called. Only those Royalties, Shamans and Elders.
Caelus couldn't help thinking about things that got answered so far.