Sofia.
After we got into their bedroom.
We found Nial in slick black trousers, a black button-up adorning his form as he scrolled through his phone sitting on the edge of the bed, his eyes drifted to his brother's then to mine.
He smiled wildly, them got up and gathered me in his arms lifting me off the ground as I squeaked. I felt myself tense for a second but accepted the show of affection, however didn't reciprocate it.
Nadei got into the closet closing the door behind him and Nikolai threw me a wink, my eyes accidentally wandered off to the wet spot on his upper thigh making me blush.
Oh, no.
And Nial noticed and smirked at his brother. His brown orbs fleeted to mine swiftly. "What have you two been up to?" He teased pulling a gurgled embarrassed sound out of me.
His raven wet locks tickled my face."I missed you," he whispered kissing from my nape to my ear and I resisted the urge to admit that I sorta-kinda-maybe-a smidgen bit missed him too.
I shook my head and gave him a small closed-lipped smile making him grin setting me down as I craned my neck to peep at him.
"Go take a shower, my love. I'll pick something out for you to wear. We're going out," he informed excitedly, already strolling into the closet and I sighed walking into the bathroom.
I undressed facing my reflection in the mirror and I couldn't help but notice the way my skin was glowing. And my eyes looking more energetic and more alive and less sunken, like they used to be.
Never have I ever seen anything but grief, pain and sadness in my blue eyes till now.
I knew that I shouldn't have felt like this.
It was wrong, so fucking wrong but I couldn't help it - the familiarity, the safety, the love that these strange men were showering me with was pure torture rendering me a hot and bothered mess with one glance.
Maybe I was too damaged to think that they wouldn't hurt me. I must had been too broken to be like the emotions they were steering inside of me.
I know that my PTSD and ADHD were a handful, my carving to be wanted by someone too was affecting my judgment. And I was aware that not everyone was my enemy or was out to get me but I couldn't help but think so at times.
My paranoia and overthinking were all a result of what I had been through.
Maybe it was just my lust and attraction for them that made me feel sympathetic and accepting. Maybe a bit reluctant on liking them but I knew that it won't be lasting for long.
I was deprived of this-the care and love when I was younger and I thought that my deprivation was what is causing me to seek validation, support, love and affection from these men.
And maybe that was indeed the true reason behind my lack of common sense.
I wasn't supposed to be getting familiarized with my captors- I didn't even think that term was right to describe them with the way they have been treating me.
A captor was meant to be a name for a vicious being trapping something or someone under their mercy for whatever fucked up reason and I just seemed to get unwanted attention and troublesome at all times.
Always stayed hidden and kept to myself after escaping my family's venomous clutches. I wanted to be reassured that they wouldn't get to me and I managed to thankfully come across that small town in the middle of nowhere.
I made it my home.
But despite all of the abuse and mental and emotional torture, I grew up to be a kind person. I didn't let my stepbrothers' hateful words that shamed me for my kindness to succumb and be a heartless greedy, power-hungry monster like them.
I wished I had a normal family, a father, a mother, a few siblings maybe a pet dog or a cat. I didn't really have a preference.
A loving family was all I asked for.
But destiny seemed to have other things up its sleeve for me as I pulled myself up from a hole just to fall into another bigger deeper one. Just a void of fucked up unnecessary feelings.
Walking aimlessly to the shower, I turned on the water to a warm heat after getting the lavender-scented body wash, shampoo and conditioner lathering my hair in the expensive products.
I washed throughoutfully grabbing a towel from the rack drying my body and rolled my eyes with a smile that found its way to my face at the thought of Camille's bubbly self that forced me to pick the many things I was now using.
"Baby girl, your clothes are laid out for you, we'll be waiting downstairs," Nial's deep yet gentle voice pulled me from my thoughts with a soft knock on the door.
"Okay!" I responded and those same thoughts of leaving this place at some point clouded my brain.
If I ran away, I'd probably expose myself and get caught by my family but if I stayed here safe, protected and out of harm's way. I would lose my heart to the three wicked Russian men.
The small sane voice in my head exhorted me to escape and build a life back up again somewhere far far away from all of this mania.
I did do it once and I would do it again but why was I doubting myself this time?
I dried my long brown and plain mane thoughtfully tying it in a tight bun as I walked out of the bathroom to excavate the clothes laid out for me and I must say, damn, Nial knew what he was doing.
I glanced at the beige outfit and lightly smiled at the choice, thankful that he didn't pick or go through the undergarments drawer to spare me the embarrassment of having to explain that Cami was the one that picked the lacy provocative lingerie.
Not that Nial would make me feel uncomfortable or tease me about it. He was awfully respectful and kind.
I honestly liked that the trio weren't being overbearingly adhesive and were actually, respecting my boundaries. None of them forced or merely hinted to impel me to do anything I didn't want.
They were actually nice. A bit possessive but they treated me right and actually better than I had been treated in my life.
I hastily fetched some panties and a bra dressing in them to scour down the expensive soft beige turtleneck dress and throw on that elegant classy coat over my shoulder and sufficing with the black knee-length boots.
Letting my hair down combing it into a slick ponytail and grabbing some moisturizer to disperse on my face equally. I applied a thick layer of mascara after curling my lashes and the cherry lipgloss to my semi-dry lips.
I finished off by spritzing my favorite lemon and cherry perfume grabbing my phone to plop it in my coat pocket. Instinctively, I caught my reflection in the floor-length mirror.
I always tried to avoid this-- to stare at your own reflection in a mirror with every doubt, flaw and insecurity you had clawing its way to remind you of how imperfect you were.
It took me a while to realize that my flaws were what made me, me.
My scars reminded me of my past, yes, but also reminded me of how strong of a person I am, of how I didn't give up-- of how I didn't relinquish the bad and ugly memories and nightmares I had.
I looked past those scars. I used to think that nobody would like damaged goods-as they said-- but I didn't agree with that.
Damaged people like me, were the ones that ended up getting loved the most.
I learned to hope for the best and expect it but they didn't like my wishful thinking and took some of my best qualities as weaknesses.
They took my kindness as an act of fragility and daintiness.
I smiled appreciatively at my reflection not noticing the door opening. I really believed that I looked beautifu-
"You look beautiful, love," Nikolai admitted keeping his voice low but still startling me as he sexily strolled to stand behind me with his reflection staring back at mine.
Those hazel eyes brightened with adoration and softness. Mine slightly softening at how his manly scent wafted through my nostrils with a hint of something earthy and musky.
"Thank you," I whispered back blushing at his compliment.
And I admired the way his dark blue button-up brought out the flecks of blue and green in his hazel eyes. His coat adorning his huge form and black trousers snug on his lean-muscled thighs and the way he looked effortlessly, dashingly handsome.
Color bloomed across my creamy cheeks as Nikolai pushed himself against my form circling his arms around my waist to bury his head in my neck.
He dipped his head to meet my eyes across the mirror, my light-colored clashing with his dark yet soft ones in a heady battle of unsaid emotions.
"You're fucking gorgeous. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise, my love--" he whispered, "You always will be to me," he kissed the length of my neck to jaw ending his smooth torture at the crown of my head to grab my hand.
I held onto his hand as we made our way out of the room down the elegant stairs coming to face Nial and Nadei's hulking tall frames.
And holy-fucking-hell.
They looked delicious. All of them.
I shook my head from the intense eye fucking daze I was in. Blushing ferociously both with embarrassment and the slight heat pooling between my legs. Damnit, they didn't even say a damn word and look at my horny self.
A low rumbling chuckle sent shivers up my spine and teased my ears with exhilaration. Fingers were hooked under my chin tilting my head towards the two as Nikolai and I reached their towering forms at the main double doors.
"See something you like, little girl?" Nadei asked tilting his head, tone teasing and I decided to play along not knowing where the sudden surge of confidence swabbed its way to my veins.
"Yes," I breathed out making the three pairs of eyes on me darken, my eyes widening in faux innocence as I gaped at Nadei.
The trio shared a couple of glances but remained silent until I giggled backing away as he made a motion to grab me, their eyes softening at the rare sound escaping my lips.
"We're not going anywhere."
"I was kidding," I laughed heartily, Nikolai following suit, my eyes snapping to his face at the genuine act warming my insides at the way his eyes squinted and the dimples on his cheeks made a cute appearance.
And the wide teasing grin on Nial's face made me laugh harder as Nadei grumbled something under his breath at my teasing but had a small smile on his face nevertheless.
Gods help me.
"Our beautiful girl teasing us, hm?" Nial chuckled kissing my cheek I tried to stop the giggle--that came out as an unattractive snort-- at the feeling of his short beard tickling my cheeks.
"It's hard not to with how easily provoked you guys are."
Nadei sent me one last smirk striding to the car getting into the driver's side, Nikolai and Nial holding my hands opening the door for me with a soft chuckle at my admission.
They got in, Nikolai on my left, Nial on my right and I felt their calloused hands clasping mine in a gentle warm grip both their thumbs rubbing my skin tenderly.
And I melted.
Looking at me expectantly their colored eyes tense waiting for me to go all uncomfortable or conscious that I was holding hands with them but I didn't instead I gripped onto them with two firm squeezes-- to reassure them that I was okay with it.
I admired the fact that they would have removed their hands away from mine if I felt or even implied that I was uneasy or uncomfortable whatsoever.
Holding hands was so underrated and I liked it.
Judge me all you want but I liked the warm feeling of their hands grasping mine in a comforting and soothing way making my nerves calm and settle.
My anxiety got the best of me sometimes but holding or focusing on something or someone made it all better. It always did.
I bit back a grin at the smiles and relieved sighs they both let out. Nadei caught my eye from the rearview mirror flashing me a soft smile and I nodded casting my eyes down to play with the rings on their hands noting how rugged yet beautiful their inked digits were.
"Let's head out, shall we," Nadei said revving the engine, the black iron gate opening automatically as the four guards received a firm nod from him.
And off we went.