We arrive at the church. Despite the drive being quiet, Juan was still asleep in my arms after crying so hard. Mother superior opens the gate for us and we take Juan in.
"Thank you Accardi. We will forever be indebted to you all." Mother Superior says, in a teary voice.
"No mother, Juan is my family too, you all are." I say.
"And Iris's family, is our family." Wallace says.
I hug Juan for the last time and leave. Raul opened the car for me and I walk in. He then signaled Stefano and Wallace to take another car.
"What's wrong Raul?" I ask after a while.
"Nothing, trust me you can't help me even if you wanted to." He says.
I am about to ask further, when someone calls him and he picks up, but then he speaks in Italian, so I couldn't understand what he was saying. It really disturbed me that he didn't think I could help him. Why? What did he want? I am his wife, shouldn't I give him what he wants? Or maybe it was work and I was overthinking.
We arrived at the house and he takes me to his room. It was remade. All the paintings and drawings of Katrina and the paintings were out, and the room looked new.
"Why did you do all that?" I ask Raul, smiling.
"Because I want to start a new life with you. And you would look prettier on the wall." he teases and I jokingly his his chest.
"Bambino." I call him and he smirks.
"You're learning Italian. That's a wonderful start." He says amidst yawns. I purr and cuddle with him.
**********************************************
It has been thirty minutes now since Raul fell asleep, but I can't help but wonder what that is that Raul says I can't help him with. Just as I was lost in my thoughts, he murmurs something. I came closer to hear, then I made it out, Jenna. Why was he calling out Jenna in his sleep. I felt my heart break. I tried to hold back my tears, but I just let them flow. Coincidentally, one falls on his finger and he shoots awake.
"You're crying. Why?" he asks, after realizing that I was facing away from him, sobbing.
"It was a nightmare." I lie.
"Why are you lying to me?" He asks me, turning me to face him. I had a strong urge to slap him, so I just got out of bed.
"Sleep on Raul. I'll be okay." I say and walk out of the room. As I decided to sleep on the couch, when I met Wallace finishing up work. He say me and quickly rushed to me.
"What happened Iris?" he asks, with a lot of concern in his voice, I just broke down.
He hugged me tightly as I cried so hard in his hard chest.
"It's okay, you don't have to say. Just cry it all out." he says. I cry for a while, then he told me to go to bed. He helped me up the stairs and was about to usher me into Raul's room, when I hesitated.
"It's okay. You can sleep in mine, I'll take the guest room." he says.
"Thank you Wallace. " I say and he nods.
"Always." he responds.
He takes me to his room, but since it was dark, I couldn't see the room clearly, so I just jump in and immediately fall asleep.
**********************************************
I wake up to Raul drawing the curtains.....
Wait, why is Raul drawing the curtains?
I pinch myself to make sure that I'm not dreaming. Ouch.
"What am I doing here?" I ask myself.
"Well, you stormed out of the room yesterday so I went to look for you. When I saw Wallace in the guest room, the I guessed you were in his room, then I took you in my arms and brought you back. He says. I fake a smile and for the first time, he takes it. Or maybe it was because it was almost genuine.
We head down for breakfast. Raul was ready, so I could tell he was heading for work. Everyone was. Well everyone except me.
I prayed for the food and and they ate, I thought about yesterday. I was now determined to prove myself wrong. One they all left, I talked to Elizabeth about it, and she decided to take me to Raul's workplace.
"Oh God, I hope I'm wrong." I pray as we drive on.
"I'm sure Master Raul wouldn't do that to you. I will show you, he's different." Elizabeth says, coming to a halt. " If I go in, they will inform Raul, but you can walk in and nobody will ask you anything. Don't worry, what you have is beautiful, and Raul knows better than to ruin it." she tells me as I walk out.
I make my way into Raul's office, and tell the secretary not to inform Raul of my presence. I walk in and find Raul's table in a mess. I wanted to arrange it but then I felt a strong urge to pee. I walked into the washroom and immediately, Someone barges in followed by smooching sounds. I peep and see something that shattered my heart into a million pieces. Raul and Jenna were seriously making out. Raul kissed Jenna so roughly and she pulled him in.
He then ripped off her shirt and bra, then sucked on her like a hungry baby. I was so shocked I couldn't move or react. I just watched, as he pushed all the documents on his table aside and bended her over the table, and slammed into her like there was no tomorrow. I heard her moan Raul's name as he banged her so hard the table was squeaking. All this time, I couldn't even cry, I could move. He went on, turning her in every position for half an hour as I watched without a blink.
He stopped when his phone rang.
"What is it Miguel, I am in the middle of something...What do you mean she is not home....She went with Elizabeth?... Where... What do you mean she is not picking up. I'll be there ." he then hangs up and took a tissue from his pocket, wiped himself, then wiped her.
"Now how am I supposed to walk out Raul..." Jenna asks , holding up her torn shirt. That was when I lost it. I walked out ever so calmly ignoring Raul's stare, remove my sweater and hand it to her. She shamelessly smirks at me then takes it and puts it on.
"Thank you Iris. You're so generous. First your husband, then your sweater. I like you." She says and walks out.
"Iris, I'm so sorry. I promise I will never..." Raul starts.
"No Raul. Don't be sorry." I tell him smiling "It wasn't your fault. It was me, see I was stupid enough to think that even though you don't love me, you would at least respect me. I was dumb enough to think that our marriage was worth more than just show. And don't worry, I won't raise my voice at you, I won't even ask you anything."
" Please don't talk like that Iris, you're breaking me from inside."
"What?" I whisper laughing and crying at the same time " You don't have a heart, so you don't know what being broken means Raul. See this is why I wanted to be a nun. Because all of you men are the same."
"No Iris, I swear I'm different."
"Yes Raul you are. You're more heartless than any of them. Anyway, as much as I want to stay, I just can't."
I was about to leave, but Raul grabbed me and pushed me against the wall, holding on to my arms tightly, but not painfully. His eyes were full of regret and hurt and I almost forgave him, but then I wasn't giving in so easily.
"Please hit me, raise your voice at me, yell at me, slap me but just do something." he begged, but I just looked at him, giving nothing away. " Please Iris, don't do this to me. Please don't just do nothing. I beg you please don't leave me. It's just that you didn't want sex, so I looked for someone who I would use
..."
Use! Are women items. I raise my hand to hit him, but I just lower it and let my tears flow.
"You are just despicable . So to you women are things you use. And you even try to justify your mistake." I scoff, "And I thought things wouldn't get any worse. Raul, I have to leave."
"No Iris, you are not going anywhere." he whispers now serious.
He walks out of his office and locks me in. I don't even try to resist. I just go to a corner, curl myself and cry.