I tiptoe to the kitchen praying no one is there.
Because I don't want to come across my father and hear him "lecture" about how he wants me to secure the first rank in the entire school or worse! What if father's wife, Samantha is there and asks me about my diet.
'She will starve me to death if she comes to know I have gained weight.'
I think to myself.
Seems like my prayers are heard. There's no one in the kitchen.
'Thank God.'
I grab the bread and peanut butter and make a sandwich, and just as I'm about to open the fridge to grab some water, the hair on my back rises due to awareness even before I hear someone enter the kitchen.
I freeze.
"Busy stealing food first thing in the morning?"
I turn around to come across Susan Watson, Samantha's daughter.
At five feet nine, she has a tall, slender figure with black shoulder length hair.
Dark black eyes and sharp nose and full lips. Even so early in the morning she looks like she could walk a runway just like that. Although she is a year younger than me, making her only 16 years old to my 17.
She moves further into the kitchen and stands just in front of me while looking down on me literally and figuratively.
She always makes sure to make me feel inferior about my comparatively five feet two height and "pathetic figure" as she quotes.
She snatches my peanut butter sandwich from the plate and gobbles up half of it, tosses the remaining bread in my direction, saying "God, I'm so full. You can eat the rest" as it falls on the ground near my feet.
'Don't always think negatively. How dare you even think about having breakfast, Amira! Don't you need to lose the extra weight that you have gained? Look at the bright side. She did you a favour by eating it before you did and gained some extra pounds.'
I chide to myself.
"What are you looking at? It's my mother who buys the grocery. "
'No, she doesn't. The butler does it with my father's money.'
But I keep that thought to myself.
She always makes sure to remind me that I don't have a mother as she does.
Emotions clog my throat.
Tears sting the back of my eyes when I think about my mom but I force them back.
'One more year.'
I say.
"The least you can do is be grateful that I'm generous enough to share it with you. Yet here you are staring at me like the ungrateful bitch that you are."
She shoves my right shoulder which is already hurt.
How? because I am a klutz and ran into a wall. Real convincing, Amira.
And the way she smirks when I hiss in pain because of the sudden impact confirms that she knew it was hurt and chose to hurt me further, purposely.
"Aren't you ashamed at all, huh?
Geez, How do you even look at yourself in the mirror with that body of yours? You fat, ugly-looking duck. I'd rather die than live in a body like that."
Another hard shove and then she's gone.
I don't let her get to me and simply
pick the remaining sandwich from the ground, throw it in the dustbin and
leave the house with an empty stomach.
Mr. Frederick, one of the drivers and a gentleman in his early 50s stands near a car.
I smile. Frederick is the closest thing I have to a father in this house because my father he is...
"Good morning, Frederick. How are you?" I ask, while forcing a bright smile.
"Morning to you too, young lady. I'm good. And you?"
I've known Fredrick all my life and even though I keep telling him to call me by my name he still calls me "young lady" all the time.
"I'm good too." I reply.
"Should I drop you at school?" He asks.
"No, I'll be going to Laura's and we'll go to school together" I politely decline.
"I can drop you at her place." He presses.
"Nah, it's fine. It's barely a 10-minute walk. I want to get some fresh air. See you, Bye!"
I brightly chip.
"Goodbye, miss. Take care."
He warmly says with a bright smile.
The truth is that I rarely go to school by car because I don't want to share a closed space with Susan since she and I go to the same school.
Not that she wants to share the same space with me anyway. So she simply kicks me out whenever and wherever she pleases.
And I end up reaching late to school which means the principal our school Mr. Andrews, who is also my father's friend informing about my late entrance to my father which further results in my father being furious and determining that I deserve to be "disciplined" about punctuality before even listening to my reasons.
Not that he will believe me if I tell him that Susan kicked me out of the car because she wanted to go pick up her friends and didn't want me to taint her "reputation" or when she purposely lies to the driver saying that I have already left the school with my friends leaving me behind to find my way back to home, alone.
She may be younger than me but she takes after her mother when it comes to mainpulating my father. My biological father who trusts her step daughter more than he trusts his real blood.
'Just one more year. Think positive.'
And with those thoughts, I leave the Sinclair Mansion as quickly as possible.