“Where are you going?” said Hugh, startled at this sudden turn of events.
“You said one drink then you’d leave me alone.” she retorted.
“Wait, please Annie, don’t leave, look, I’m sorry. I’ve been alone for a long time, I have no idea how to do this, please sit down.” He tried to grab her hand but Annie stepped out of reach. She had heard about the connection a wolf would feel when they touched their mate and she didn’t want anything else to cloud her judgement.
“Tell her about us.” suggested Knox.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t been having the dreams too, I know you must have.” said Hugh, he saw her cheeks colour and he knew she had. “Look, let you tell me about myself,” he said desperately, “You might understand why I left the wedding, please sit.” he indicated to her chair.
Annie hesitated, “Give him a chance.” Sabine encouraged. Annie could feel that Sabine was becoming smitten with this wolf with his old fashioned values. She sighed and sank to her seat. Hugh went to get more drinks while Annie hung her coat over the back of the chair once more. When Hugh came back to the table Annie remained silent, waiting for him to speak.
“I did have a mate,” he started, “We met when we were very young, just out of high school. The next thing I knew were both nineteen and expecting our first pup. I took over from my father before my twentieth birthday, just as our son, Lennox was born. A year and a half later, our daughter Lyall was born. When Lennox was five and Lyall three, some rogues wandered onto our territory. My mate, Aisling had just taken our pups to nursery and had decided to take her wolf for a run in the glens when she ran into some rogues. I don’t think these rogues realised they were on Reiver territory to be honest, so when Aisling ran into them, they attacked her. They killed her of course, she was a good fighter but she didn’t stand a chance with that many of them. We didn’t find her body for almost two days, I had to tell the kids that she had died in an accident, I didn’t want them to know their mum had been raped and dismembered, how could I tell them that? Myself and the pack hunted the rogues down and killed them, all of them, but from that day I vowed that I would always be true to Aisling.”
Annie looked horrified. “Oh, I’m so sorry.” she breathed.
“I threw myself into work and bringing up the pups with the help of the omegas. They have turned out really well,” he said, pride radiating out of his face. “Lennox is almost ready to take my position, he and his mate have a pup and Lyall met her mate a few years ago and lives in the next village with their daughters.”
Annie noticed how his face changed when he talked about his children, his eyes lit up and shone, his features softened. She unexpectedly found herself smiling, “It must have been hard bringing them up alone.”
“Some of it is a bit of a blur to be honest, the omegas were incredible, I couldn’t have done it without them. It made us close though, I’ll say that.”
Annie really was lost for words, what an awful thing to happen to a young family.
“I’m sorry about running off at the wedding, it was just..” he paused, glanced at Annie to gauge her reaction and took a breath before continuing, “I didn’t know the Goddess even gave people like me a second chance, it just took me by surprise and I suppose I panicked. I was worried about how my kids would react too, you know, them thinking I was replacing their mum, it felt like a betrayal to her memory.” he smiled a sad smile, “I’m not sure Lyall even remembers her mother, she was so young.” He fell silent lost in his own thoughts for a few seconds. “I’m telling you this because I don’t want you to think that when I left the wedding like I did that had anything to do with you, because it didn’t, truly.” He paused, then asked,
“Could you explain something about what you said before?”
Annie nodded, “Yes, of course.” clearing her throat and finally finding her voice, her emotions in turmoil. She felt sad for this man and clouded by her own past experiences she had judged him without even considering there could be reasons behind his bizarre behaviour.
“You said that you of all people know the mate bond is not binding, what did you mean by that?”
“Oh, well, yeah,” said Annie becoming flustered. After hearing what Hugh had been through, her story didn’t seem that important anymore.
Hugh noticed the blush reach her cheeks, she seemed uncomfortable and worrying he had unknowingly insulted her again he gently said,
“You don’t have to tell me, I shouldn’t have asked.”
Annie felt Sabine brace herself. “Tell him Annie, he told us his story, we should tell ours. If he doesn’t understand then he is not the wolf for us.” encouraged Sabine.
Annie steeled herself and put a passive expression on her face, “No, it’s ok. I have been rejected, not once but twice.” As she said the words she realised she had never, in twenty years ever said those words out loud. To do so lifted a weight she didn’t know she was carrying off her shoulders. The twenty years of shame that she had been dragging around with her fell away, why had she felt shame? The shame didn’t belong to her, it wasn’t hers to carry, it belonged to the mates who had rejected her.
Hugh’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, he didn’t know someone could survive that once, never mind twice. He realised that this was a strong woman he was mated with, stronger than any Reiver woman he knew.
“The first time was when I was sixteen, on my birthday to be exact. I walked into school one morning and the most popular boy in my year rejected me in front of the whole school with his friends laughing and goading him on. I wasn’t one of the popular girls you see, I was the studious one, he was sleeping with his girlfriend and she was one of the beautiful people by the way.” Annie took a breath, “It took me a year to recover from that one and my wolf was weakened for a while, but we got through it though with the help of my family,” tears pricked her eyes at the memory of the humiliation. “The second time, I was twenty, I went to the Moon Ball with my family in Cumbria, there was a wolf there who rejected me as soon as he saw me. He already had pups with his girlfriend and didn’t want a mate complicating his already complicated life. His girlfriend laughed as I crumpled into a heap in my ball gown, needless to say I’ve not attended a Moon Ball since. I almost lost my wolf that time, it was a long recovery but I did it.” Annie finished and looked at Hugh. “So as you can imagine, I don’t have much faith in the mate bond.” Annie drained her glass, “Do you want another?” she asked.
Hugh nodded and stood up but Annie stopped him “No, it’s ok, I’ll get these.” she said motioning him to sit down and had grabbed her bag and gone to the bar before he could argue.