Itachi now gets his whole body check up once in a week.His condition has started to get better,all thanks to the regular medication. Itachi is getting used to this lifestyle now. He also takes part time jobs every now and then. He can now compete for the best barista ever title and he will effortlessly win it as well.
If I talk about our relationship, well there hasn't been any improvements. I guess it's still one sided. Itachi doesn't really talk about his feelings. It's always me who keeps blabbering that how much I love him. But I fail everytime to get an answer out of him.
Today I finally got my medical license as a neurologist. I'm no longer an intern. I'm officially a doctor now. My mom was on the seventh cloud hearing this news. She even planned a party next week to celebrate this occasion. I think she's going overboard with it but it has been ages since we threw a party so it's alright i guess. I wanted to celebrate with Itachi.So we went for a walk in the nearby park,getting some ice-cream on our way.
"Look!" I said pointing towards a dango stall. "They're selling dangos. Let's get some." I ran towards the stall.
"Slow down, Naomi." "You will trip at this rate." He rushes after me.
"5 sticks of dango please."
"That would be 3000 yen."
"Here you go." I take out the money and hand them over to the seller.
"I know you like dango. Don't you?" I grin at Itachi.
"Thank you for remembering." He chuckles taking a dango stick.
"It's sweet!" I said stuffing more dangos in my mouth.
Suddenly Itachi leans down to me, wiping the corner of my lips with his thumb.
"Wha..what are you doing?" My heart skipped a bit.
"You had food there. I cleaned it for you." Here he goes giving the most straightforward answers.
I look down as i feel my cheeks heat up.When I gaze up at him, I find him already looking up at some children,playing among themselves.His constant gaze filled up with sorrow as he silently walks past those kids.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing." He continues to walk away.
Just a few moments ago he was smiling with me. I kept wondering to myself if I did something to upset him.
"Shit!" I clench my fist. "I ate more than half of the dangos by myself."
"Is he mad because I ate his share?" I think to myself.
"I can just buy him more!" I giggle. "Yes!That should work." I was on my way to buy him more dangos.
"Itachi" I call out his name,while running to him. "I bought more dangos for you. You can have them all by yourself." A big grin appeared on my face.
"I don't have an appetite."He rejected my dangos. "You can have them." His stern voice left me speechless.
It wasn't for dangos. Then what could it be. I start to blame myself for not paying enough attention to him. I could just ask him.But knowing Itachi's nature,I doubt he will tell me anything.Probably I'll give some space so that he could talk to me when he's ready.
Itachi has grown distant.He doesn't really talk to me.Even if I tried to strike a conversation he'd cut me off or simply avoid me.He goes to bed before i could return from work,so that he won't have to face me.It has been like this since the park incident. It has started to worry me now.
As usual I return home at night after an exhausting day.
"I'm home." The lack of response assured me that he already went to bed.
I take off my shoes and head to my bedroom.I throw myself on the bed,fighting the urge not to fall asleep right away. I somehow drag myself to the washroom to freshen up. I got out from the washroom and the first thing I noticed was a fine man sitting on my bed.
"I thought you were asleep." I said as i put some lotion on my hands.
"How can I sleep knowing that you still haven't return from work."
"Who are you trying to trick? Everyday I return from work just to find you asleep by then." Throwing tantrums is a part of my nature.
"I would pretend to be asleep.So that you won't confront me with a bunch of questions." He replied.
"Then why are you here? You know I will still demand answers."
"I'm here to talk." His voice gentle as ever.
I sit down beside him,staring deep into his raven orbs.
"I don't think I deserve any of this." His gaze turned down.
" I forgot about everything for a while. I was selfish for that."
"What do you mean?" Confusion taking over my mind.
" I thought I could have a normal life with you here. A normal life where I wouldn't have to worry about anything." A little sigh escaped his mouth.
" Of course you can have that life. I will make sure you do." I try my best to reassure him.
"Even if I try to forget my past, It will still linger like my shadow.And how can I forget that the sins I committed will never perish." He won't look up at me.
"My only punishment is to suffer every second before death comes for me. Even that wouldn't be enough to cover up for my sins."
My heart ached with every word he spoke.
"You had so much on your mind. Why didn't you tell me earlier?" My hand reaches out for his cheeks,caressing them with my thumb.
" I have already caused you a lot of trouble. I don't want to worry you anymore." He sounded sincere with his words.
" I love you Itachi." This is the first time I have been straight forward with my feelings. "Even if you insist me not to worry about you I can't help it. I want a share in your happiness as well as in your misery. Please don't push me away." My voice cracked.
" I can't push you away Naomi." He finally gazed up at me.
"Because I love you. I really do. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to be by your side and protect you." His raven orbs stared deep into mine.
"But every time I want to lay my hands on you, I get reminded that I've took uncountable lives with these hands.You don't deserve to be touched by these hands." "That day in the park, the kid reminded me of Sasuke. I snatched away his childhood from him and pushed him into the never ending darkness. He is passing his days with nothing but resentment and hatred in his heart. How am I supposed to lead a happy life when I ruined my own brother's life?" His breathe shaked as he continued to talk.
"Itachi don't…" I felt a lump in my throat which prevented me from completing my sentence.
"I don't want to mess with your life Naomi. You have done enough for me. You should stop now."
"Messing with my life?" I take a deep breath before i started talking again.
"You give my life a meaning Itachi." I could see his eyes softened. The way he was looking at me has been changed now.
"You have put your medical license on line for my sake. I'm already crushed down under your countless favors."
"So what? You're much more important than my medical license. And I'm not doing you a favor. I'm doing all these willingly because I want to. I want to protect you and keep you with me. I can't afford to lose you Itachi."
A tear escaped from his raven orbs. His eyes told me everything without him having to say a word.
I leaned towards him and embraced him. I felt like he needed this more than any petty words. I tightened my grip as I held him more close to me. I could feel his hot breath falling on my collarbone.Moments later his hands trailed through my backrest,as he pulled away. His eyes looking straight into mine while I was a little hesitant to look into his as my cheeks were still painted into pink tint.
"I only crave you Naomi. I love you. And I want to love you for a long time. A really long time."
"I love you Itachi.More than anyone ever could." I felt like i could cry.
His gaze shifted to my lips. I closed my eyes once he got busy in closing the gaps between our faces. A pair of soft lips melted on mine,slow yet passionate. His hands found their way to my cheeks,cupping them. I was lost under his gentle touch and I had no intention of coming back to reality. I wished time would stop and we could live in this moment forever.
~To be continued~