A human being goes through many phases. These phases may last long, some short, and others shorter or longer.
Currently, I, Dover Montano, am experiencing one of these phases.
It came to me in the form of an event.
I was at that event.
I was just standing in one of the corners of the mansion where the event took place when, suddenly, I heard a familiar song.
~ "Shoot for the moon." "And they don't stop coming, and they don't stop coming." ~
The lyrics were so nostalgic and familiar that they made me remember the time when I was young. I had memorized every line of the song. I used to tap the DVD to start it every time I thought of my dreams of being surrounded by enormous piles of money. As you can imply, I played it so many times that I remembered every line of the song.
Then, it hit me.
Not just a simple hit. It was a hit that brought a sudden realization: the fact that everything I had done up to this point was to be surrounded by enormous piles of money. Well, not literally surrounded by it, but to have enough to do whatever I wanted in life.
This realization made me reflect on the choices I had made that led to my current life as a white-collar worker. I had lost my path. The path I wanted to take. I had drifted so far away from the dreams of my ambitious youth to become a fully grown adult who lowered their standards. Instead of aiming to do anything I wanted in life, I had settled for having just enough to make me content with my position.
A position that I held just because I could. Sure, the job had its perks, advantages, and a great salary, but it wasn't the one I had dreamed of.
"Not like this..." I thought, as I contemplated my entire life up to this point and my future. Some may dismiss my thoughts as some sort of existential crisis, but no. It was a very strong feeling. Like electricity running through my veins, it gave me an urge to act on this feeling. More specifically, to act and fulfill my dream.
I tried to think of it as just an impulse, an explosive thought that might do more harm than good.
But...
The more deeply I thought about it, the more I realized it wasn't an impulse or an explosive moment that would do more harm than good. It was a reminder from my subconscious mind to do something about this dream that had always lingered at the back of my mind. To act and fulfill it.
Maybe it was stress piling up on me, or a chain of negative events, people, ideas, or other circumstances that pushed me to this corner. Maybe it was my favorite childhood song that triggered this emotional burst. Whatever the reason, it still stood that my dream was not yet fulfilled.
Unbeknownst to me, I had been shedding tears. I only noticed when a drop fell onto my glass, like rain falling into a puddle. I frantically observed my surroundings to see if anyone had noticed.
Much to my relief, no one seemed to have noticed. They were just chatting and having dinner, enjoying the birthday celebration hosted by my superiors. I joined the event because, well, I liked free food and snacks.
But not today. I was having a very critical moment and needed a more fitting place to think thoroughly about everything running through my mind.
As I wiped my drying tears, I prepared to get the hell out of the place when a woman standing in front of me asked a question as I turned around.
"Are you alright?"
Apparently, someone had noticed.
In that moment, I was ready to say, "Get out of my way, woman," but then I noticed her face. Her jade-white skin, clear blue eyes with a beautiful hue, and long eyelashes made her stunningly beautiful.
It was distracting.
I immediately tried to clear my stupor, but I hadn't noticed that most of the guests' eyes were on me, likely because of the beauty interacting with me.
I couldn't care less about that.
"I'm on a roll right now, please excuse me."
I didn't think adding "please" was really necessary, but yeah, I was on a roll.
Walking past her, I made a beeline for the host and informed them that I was leaving and had something urgent to do tonight. The host simply bade me farewell.
Stepping outside the mansion, I unlocked my car with my keys, got in, and drove home. While I mentioned that I had a great salary, I had managed to get the car for a cheap price.
Anyway, my house was the best place to think about this stuff.
Opening the gate and entering my home, I was greeted by silence. With no relationships to warrant a child waiting for me at the door, I often thought about getting a guard dog just to have someone or something to greet me.
"Ha..." I let out a breath as my mind raced with jumbled thoughts.
I immediately opened my computer and began writing. Putting my thoughts into words helped me organize them and made them clearer. It created a cohesive description of what was currently running through my head.
I wrote pages and pages, my brain feeling like it was on fire. It felt like I could continue forever.
"Click, clank, tap, tap."
The sound of me hitting the keys on my keyboard filled the room that night.
"...and done."
I uttered these words as I hit the final period on my keyboard.
Only when I noticed the light of the windows brighten did I realize how much time had passed.
I couldn't care less about the sun. Weakly moving my body to my bed, I closed my eyes and finally slept. My body was tired. It was better to rest now and tackle the things I needed to do another day.