Lanker Meets the Mouse Family
In an instant Lanker is transformed into the same size as the mouse. The only problem he has with this fact of being, is him remaining in casts and possessing club feet. He often attempts to transform this specific situation using the magic taught to him by the spectrum back in Richmond, but he is warned by midnight voices on the wind, where the course determined by one's secular fate can never be diverted.
"Hello there, you little rat!" addresses Lanker, somewhat profanely to the mouse. "You never did tell me your name."
"Oh, well...," the mouse chuckles as he speaks, "my name is Robert Lovedandrich."
"I never heard such a name before," retorts Lanker, with a sneer.
"You've never heard the name, Robert, before?" asks the mouse.
"No, Lovedandrich."
"On one hand, it's not a real name, but, then on the other hand I am well loved, and I enjoy the riches of all who live around me," readily informs the mouse to the somewhat puzzled little boy, Lanker. "I have perfect shelter here, and endless access to the very best food any mouse could ever dream of. I might be hated by the outside world, but I am certainly loved by my own kind, I can tell you that much."
"Wow! I never thought of anything like that for you, or any mouse for that matter," says Lanker.
"Come on inside the house, here, if you would," offers the mouse to Lanker.
Lanker followed the mouse into the chewed-out room. The gnawed archway on the door now seems more like one supporting an elegant cathedral roof, rather than a hole only the size of Lanker's small fist. As he passes underneath the archway, he enters into a well-designed living room area, complete with a large couch, constructed from some disassembled furniture found inside a child's doll house, then reassembled where it stood. In likewise fashion, there is a series of small furniture accommodations resembling those found inside an elegantly fancy, yet tiny doll house. There is even a tiny stove and a small tea set, only to Lanker now, this tiny size is about near to absolute perfection. To be honest about the matter, this mouse and his clan live better than a growing number of humans in the entire western world, based on pictures he once saw in books about Europe and all.
The mouse's well-dressed family sit around a fancy doll house eating table, appearing to have been constructed from oak wood. All seven of them sip coffee and tea from the tiny cups, found inside a child's dollhouse tea set. The mouse at the end of the table is donned in the antique uniform of a sea Captain. The entire family nods politely, while smiling brightly, as Lanker pauses before them. Surely there must have been a doll somewhere, at some time in the past, who wore the classical styled outfit of a Sea Captain. Lanker would have to inquire of such back in the world of men.
"Welcome to my home, Lanker, and my family greets you warmly," Robert says. "You have entered the headquarters of Enterprise Search & Find. We earned our fortune from this now, time honored family business. I perceive you visualizing the methodology we utilized in acquiring our lavish accommodations."
Lanker smiles as he crawls along. He attempts to politely nod, though he fails to understand the words spoken by the mouse.
"The gentleman at the end of the table, donned in the captain's uniform, is the grand patriarch of the family and business. He is also my grandfather. His name is Jacob Whiskers. He wears the Sea Captain's uniform because he came over on an ocean-going vessel, and it was on this vessel that our family business was born."
Lanker nods humbly and politely.
"Nice to meet you Captain Whiskers," he addresses.
The captain raises his cup to him.
"Do you see the lady dressed as a beautiful belle, sitting so elegantly at his right-hand side? That is his dear wife, Mrs. Jezebel Tassels. Mrs. Tassels is also my own Grandmother. She is the company logistics planner and mathematician,"
Mrs. Tassels then raises her own cup toward Lanker, smiling politely.
"The hard looking gentleman to the right of my mother is my father, Sir Cheese. Sir Cheese is the backbone of the enterprise, the workhorse, if you will. He gets the assigned task completed, without many questions. His perfectly starched suit and tie matches his air of professionalism, don't you think?"
"Wow, so nice to meet you all," so addresses Lanker, after such a long silent spell.
"To his right sits Mrs. Spice, my own mother. She gives direct assistance to all company ventures, from a true ladies perspective. Her dress is one of a flapper girl, since she conveys a representation of modernity, in the name of the company, toward its prospective customers."
"You seem so nice. A real pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Spice," says Lanker on a sarcastic note, with a slight nod in her direction and an ever-embracing smile. Mrs. Spice smiles warmly in his direction, then she speaks.
"I am glad we could meet you. We have never hosted a human inside our house before. However, you humans have hosted us inside your homes, many more times than I could ever imagine."
"Yes, Mrs. Spice," nods Lanker, "so it was about time for you to return the kind favor, don't you think, mam?"
"Why, I should say, there Robert, this little boy has genuine wit about him. I am so happy you have made friends with him."
Robert bows, as he continues smiling to the others remaining in his family who were seated at the dollhouse table, dressed so elegantly in doll's clothing, as were all the others.
"The three others around the end of the table are my brothers. The one sitting at the end of the table on my mother's right, dressed in green hunting clothes like the kind Robin Hood wore, is Mr. Sly. He is the company sleuth. He finds new work projects, reveals their pay potential, problems in the system, problems in customers, and the like."
Mr. Sly then raises his coffee cup, saying.
"Bravo, my dear brother, a job well done!"
"Coming back around the table, to his right is my next brother, Senior Perezsoto. He is nearly always donned in ragged blue jeans and a T-shirt." His head rests upon the table as he slumbers away. "Ere, um.., shall we say, he is still a work in progress. Any tips for improvement would be greatly appreciated at this time. Even though Senior Perezsoto hates productivity, he loves thriving on the handouts of productive family members.
"The last brother there, seated at the center of the table coming up, is Mr. Golliwog. He is the company negotiator, and he assists us all in publicity efforts. See how warm his smile is from inside that thick mustachio? He enjoys his lavish accommodation provided by the company for the small, but very important services he renders."
Lanker smiles, then nods in polite humbleness.
"Wow! It sure is such a pleasure in meeting all of you. I suppose you already know my family, right?" Lanker asks Robert.
"Well, yes, and no, but yes more so, I guess," replies Robert with a broad smile and laugh.
"And what could the family do for you," inquires Mr. Golliwog, sensing the possibility for great business potential found in them hosting a human for the very first time in mouse history, since the truth otherwise was always the other way around.
"Well," says Lanker, "I have this little problem. I overheard my grandfather say my people came all the way to America from Ireland, back in the late 1600's. That makes us old Irish, rather than the poor ones of more recent times. He also said our people were once very wealthy, but the English had taken away all of our wealth, which is why we came to America. We were hoping to make a new start."
"And so it was," replies Captain Whiskers, nodding in firm agreement.
"Everybody knows the Irish, the old Irish, that is, laid back 20 percent in gold of their total estate value. They never touched this wealth until they found a way to make it grow. I believe Grandpa might have a share of it, and I aim to find out."
"Yes, and I have indeed heard him speak of such matters in the privacy of his bedchamber, on the twelfth striking," replies Mrs. Spice. "Sounds like a task for the family sleuth, if you should ask me."
"Before we agree to take on this project, Mr. Lanker, we must be clear on one single matter. The family must know clearly what our stake is in this venture," firmly speaks Mr. Sly
"What about 20 percent of the total take?," asks Lanker.
"Gold doesn't interest us. We have no value for it," Sly courtly informs.
"What about a 20 percent value in cheese?"
"We are not as crazy over cheese, as old fairy tales have led humans to believe, dear Lanker there," Sly continues.
"What about the same value in pecans, then."
"Pecans sound much better, by far!" snaps Mr. Golliwog in reply. "We've found our own treasure now!"
"Then so it is," replies Lanker, but only if you can locate this pot of gold, long lost by my ancestors."
Soon as Lanker struck the deal with the Enterprise, Search & Seek, he decides it would be best for him to take his leave from the mice, to return again into the world of mankind until further notice. He casually steps back outside of the hole, and into the closet. In the meantime, he initiates his own search for this elusive pot of gold. While gazing off into a trance-like state, imagining a full moon above, he speaks the sacred timeless chant.
Midnight flashlight,
golden gamble,
throughout the earth I am destined
to ramble.
Bring me delicate mints,
make me more pecan pies,
by the gods in all of heaven,
please return me to my original size."