The water beneath Sunshine's toes feels warm and soothing against her skin. She watches as tiny waves splash, reaching the tips of her toes. She stands just far enough from the shore that her feet barely touch the water—she doesn't want to get wet. After all, she isn't here to swim. She's here to stare at the horizon, to let her mind drift into the Abyss.
She turns her head toward a group of people, chatting and laughing. Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves. She's not envious, though—she's content. Just one more week of this retreat, and then she'll be back home. Time feels slower here, almost as if it's moving backward since she first boarded the plane.
Sitting there, looking at everything around her, she feels so small, so withdrawn. 'Ugh,' she sighs. 'How did I even end up here?'
Two weeks ago, she was sipping a coffee at work, wishing she were sipping an umbrella drink by the ocean. And now, here she is, feeling like she's back at work—occupied and busy.
She feels a sudden shift of the wind, and the air turns cold. As she hurries to get up, she sees Sky walking toward her.
"Hey!" Sky greets her when he comes to a stop.
"Hello!" Sunshine responds, motioning to her spot as she steps aside. "Your turn!" She smiles awkwardly. How much longer must she endure feeling this way every time she sees him, or is near him? Will there ever come a point where she can act normal around him?
"Oh, are you going back inside?" he asks.
"Yup, you need anything?" Wait—what? That's not what she meant to say. She's trying to get away.
"Er, uhm, I mean… I can bring it back for you. Want some water?"
"Yeah, actually, I could use some water," he says, smiling. She almost melts into the sand. Her knees feel weak just from the sight of his teeth.
'Holy cannoli,' she whispers under her breath before running off.
Sky turns to sit, his gaze lingering on Sunshine until she disappears from his sight. Moments later, she returns, two bottles of water in hand.
Sunshine's mind is scattered, a jumble of thoughts and confusion. Why did she do that? Why does her mind say one thing, but her heart pulls her in another direction? Every time she tries to follow logic, her heart wraps itself in a web of delusions.
"Here." She hands him a bottle and hurriedly turns so she doesn't have to see his mesmerizing face again.
"Hey…" he says softly, catching her hands and tugging her gently.
"Come, sit."
"Wa—, I…" She stands frozen, unable to say another word. He tugs her hand again, harder this time, and pulls her down to sit beside him. She makes sure to sit far enough that he can't hear her heart beating way out of rhythm.
"Thanks, by the way." Sky mutters. As she turns to look up at him, her eyes meet his, and she could almost swear they twinkled. Though she's very certain that was only in her imagination.
She maintains her gaze and smiles before looking away. What's the matter with her? 'Breathe…' she tells herself.
"Do you know how to swim?" After a while, Sky breaks the silence. Sunshine is caught off guard. It's a great question. Does she actually know how to swim? When was the last time she swam in a body of water? Does wiggling and doing 'the mermaid thing' count as swimming? She doesn't know. When she doesn't respond, Sky continues.
"I asked because I haven't seen you swim since we've been here." He smiles, clearly teasing her.
She lets out a sigh. "No, you know what? I don't think I do," she chuckles a little. "I guess I've never learned." She continues. "I almost drowned when I was little, and ever since then, I've just been afraid." She pauses.
"My friends and I were swimming in a river one summer. We were playing with a ball, and I chased it into the deep end. I panicked when I realized my feet weren't touching the ground anymore. I screamed for help, told everyone I was drowning, but they wouldn't believe me. They were all laughing as I came up and down. But there was this one little girl who tried to rescue me. As she tried to pull me out, I was drowning her in the process. That's when everyone realized I wasn't joking, and they all jumped in to help us out."
Sky's face softens after hearing her story. "Oh, my…" he murmurs, scooting closer. "What happened after?" he asks gently.
"Well, I remember having a terrible headache. I think I drank a lot of water. We all went home and didn't say a word to my mom," she concludes.
"That's scary." Sky's attention is fully on her face, and Sunshine nods in agreement. She can't tell if Sky is wanting to comfort her in that moment, but she senses that it has affected him. Could this man get any more attractive? How is his solemn expression so flawlessly beautiful?
This is the moment she's always wanted with him. This alone time. The trip is almost over, and this is their first time sitting down together. She thought he'd been avoiding her this entire time. But now, here he is, walking toward her. Wanting to sit with her.
She's tired of wondering, tired of never knowing. One moment, he's aloof, the next, he's caring. What's his deal? She misses the time when she could tell him everything without hesitation. This is the first real conversation they've had in a while. And now, the things she wants to share feel so heavy—too heavy to risk pushing him away.