Two years later, news arrived that my father came running to share with me. He showed me a picture in the newspaper of a young woman with a scar that went from her mouth to her ear and Marcos beside her. The news said that they had separated. And that was not all. He sent that newspaper and a note showing regret and asking his father to take him back. I did not believe for a minute that regret, I distrusted Marcos, because he never mentioned how he knew our address and this to me was a sign that something in that story was false. Maybe the whole thing was fake. But Dad was excited. And not listening to my warnings of a possible frame-up, he sent another letter inviting him to join us again.
Dad, helped by my father-in-law, prepared a wing of the mansion we lived in just for Marcos, so that he could have more privacy. I demanded that Gabriel take me to a place of our own, for I had no desire to be close to my brother and had no confidence in him. Nothing could take my mind off the fact that the whole thing was a trap. However, after much discussion, Gabriel convinced me to stay, promising that I would not allow him to visit our side.
I knew when he arrived, because of the party they were having on his side of the mansion. The celebration lasted two days. Gabriel told me that he also found him suspicious when he saw that he didn't come alone. He brought with him a servant who wore a hat that prevented his face from being seen, and made sure that he stayed in one of the guest rooms and not in the servants' area. He also demanded that this servant's food be prepared, but only he could bring it to him. Gabriel found this even stranger because he had never heard of a boss serving his employee. It was not common. I thought it was strange too, but I refused to think about anything to do with my brother.
Days later, I was sitting on the swing in the garden, thinking about how my life had changed after I moved to Italy, that I didn't even notice the cautious steps approaching. When I least expected it, Marco sat down on the swing next to mine. I got up to leave at that moment, but out of curiosity, his words made me stay. I didn't sit down again, but I wanted to know how far he would go.
"You better stay Eloisa, or your son dies."
"Are you threatening me inside my own home? I think you have lost your mind my brother. You're on my turf now."
"I'm not kidding. Your son is meeting right now with a person I trust who is watching us and if I raise my hand, you will see your son die.
I looked up at the mansion and quietly watched the upstairs windows. Indeed, at one of the windows there was someone obscured by the curtains holding a child, who I didn't want to look at for long. I turned to him with a smile on my face.
"What do you want?" I asked amused, for I cared little about the child's fate. However, I had to protect it, if I had it in my power, so as not to cause pain to my beloved.
"Justice. You have deformed my bride. I want compensation."
"How can you accuse me of something like that?"
Marcos turned and faced me.
"I've witnessed you torturing her. And in fact I even know you were generous with her. You pulled out just a fingernail and then cut off her face.... You also got her hooked on narcotics. It took us a long time to rid her of the addiction and the trauma."
"Why do you care about this just now? Didn't you separate? Forget about it my dear brother."
"Eloisa, I knew you didn't believe in this separation as soon as I set foot here and you weren't there to greet me. I was even more sure when Dad forbade me to go to your side of the mansion. You were always smarter than Dad."
"Daddy was going to shoot her in the head and I saved her life. The scar she carries is the reminder that she was saved by me..." I said ignoring her words.
"Yes. She recognizes that you intervened to keep her alive and that you had no choice but to cut off her face. That alone kept your son alive. We had many opportunities to take him and harm him without them suspecting us. It seems that you are very careless about the child."
I decided to sit down again and began to sway slowly.
"If she recognizes that, why are you here? Does she want to mark me too? What have you come for? I can't understand the point of all this theater. I imagine she is the servant you keep in the guest room..."
"Papa betrayed my father-in-law. He wishes revenge for the men who were killed and also for the deformation of his daughter. But we have no intention of hurting you."
"And you believe that you and your wife alone can do something against him here?" I asked laughing at my brother's innocence. "Whatever you do to him here, he will not come out alive. Neither you nor your wife. That being the case, what's the point of carrying out a vendetta that you won't be able to celebrate?"
"We didn't come to hurt Daddy. Not in the way you are imagining. He will be sorry, but without me laying a finger on him."
"It's very cryptic. And it's exhausting..."
"We have come to take you and your son with us."
I looked at Marcos and when I realized he was serious, I let out a laugh and then started laughing uncontrollably. He remained impassive.
"How do you intend to do that?" I asked still laughing.
"If you show no resistance, it will be much easier. However, if you willingly deny going, my father-in-law's men will storm this place, kill everyone and take you both away anyway."
"So you didn't come alone... Marcos, put your mind to thinking. You are in enemy territory. The boss here is my father-in-law. And he is surrounded by many allies. No matter how many people you have brought, you will still be too few to face my father-in-law's army. Believe me. Leave with your wife while there is still time. If you stay, you will certainly die.
Marcos looked at me with a gleam of triumph in his eyes.
"Every man has a price." He said cryptically and stood up. "I will give you a week to settle it. The lives of many here are in your hands. The decision is yours, whether it will come for good or ill. It makes no difference to me, I only advise you to be discreet with what you know." He said and walked away.
I didn't doubt what he said. He probably should have bought a lot of men in there. We were surrounded by enemies. Surely Marcos arranged this before he came here. If they attacked us in there, it would take time for the allies to realize that something was wrong. I couldn't help but admire that he was a genius. His only mistake was to trust me with that secret. I would never allow him to do any harm to Gabriel. The only person I ever really loved. He was the reason for my existence.
I went to my room and lay down thoughtfully. Gabriel came to see me right away.
"I've been looking for you. Shall we have dinner?" He said sitting down next to me on the bed. "Are you okay?"
I ran my hand over his face.
"Yes, my love. I'm fine." I said and sat up to receive a passionate kiss from my beloved.
"Shall we go then?"
I got up and accompanied him. The conversation over dinner was about a trip he intended to take soon to negotiate with mob bosses from other countries. I listened thoughtfully about how to tell Gabriel about my brother's plan without causing bloodshed. I saw that Gabriel expected me to complain about his travels, so I complained to make him feel victorious and it worked. However, for the first time, he surprised me.
"This time you will come with me."
I looked disgustedly at Gabriel and dropped the cutlery.
"Just us?" I asked already oblivious to the problem that plagued me. Gabriel knew well that I couldn't stand the presence of his son.
"He will go, but I have already planned everything so that you won't see or hear him. He will be looked after by two nannies that I hired for this occasion, and the one here will also go, because he already trusts her, he even calls her his mother..."
He said in a rush to get me to accept and didn't see that he had gone too far. To me, it didn't matter that the child called anyone mother. What bothered me was the glint of admiration I saw in his gaze when he spoke of the nanny his son called mother.
"If it's to not even hear the voice.... I think it's going to be a dream trip." I said, knowing he expected an answer. "When do you plan to go?"
"In three weeks if that's okay with you."
"Yes. That's fine."
He then started talking about all the places we would visit together on this trip. I loved to see the excitement of a child on his face. It made me happy.
After dinner we went to our room, where we loved each other. Again he whispered in my ear that we should try for another child. I kissed and caressed him, making him forget this desire to be a father again. He surrendered as always to the pleasures I gave him in bed.
After we loved each other. Sleepless, we remained embraced in silence, listening to each other's gasping breaths slowly return to normal. I decided to tell Gabriel about Marcos and was surprised when he smiled reassuringly and kissed me, with new cheer.
"I was afraid you were on this plan with him. You were seen today by our men, talking in the garden."
I got up and sat down on the bed.
"You already knew about this?"
"Before he came here, he approached the men within these walls. He offered them money in an amount that they couldn't refuse. We advised them to accept and do everything to gain their trust. We are safe."
"How can you be sure that the men will not betray you at the last moment?"
"Because they have always been trustworthy. Most of the men here were my class friends, and the older ones are my father's godchildren. They are people who have a very strong sense of duty to their family. Your people will never understand this, because they think betrayal among relatives is commonplace. Here we protect even our countrymen even if they are not family."
"Is my father knowing about this too?"
"Yes. He knows."
"But he... How could he let my brother come into this trap? It's his blood!"
"We needed to know what his father-in-law's revenge plans were. We couldn't afford to be taken by surprise.... I just don't understand what they want with you and our son..." He said thoughtfully and distractedly.
"Well... I believe it's a way to target Dad, preventing him from having heirs. They were very close and my brother's father-in-law always knew how important an heir was to him. Taking me away would end his chances of having more grandchildren who could be raised by him."
"Yes... It makes sense. But I think his greater motivation is to kill my father and take his place. I don't know how to stop your brother from getting hurt. Because he will order the attack. And even if I trust my men, there are thirty more armed men on this property, hiding. Waiting for your brother's attack. Papa has given the order to shoot to kill anyone who tries to approach our son."
We still talked a lot about that during the late afternoon, until I fell asleep. When I woke up, Gabriel was no longer beside me. I got up and opened the curtain, discovering that it was already night. I felt afraid. The image of Gabriel shot in the living room flashed through my mind. I ran downstairs, but there was no one there. But I had to see Gabriel to be calm. As I was walking up the steps again, I ran into one of the waiters who came carrying an empty tray.
"Where are you coming from?"
"From the boss's room."
"Have you seen Gabriel around?"
"Yes. He's in the boss's company."
I finished going up the stairs and went back to my room. I didn't want to interrupt the conversation between father and son. I lay down, but I couldn't nail my eyes shut. I knew that at that moment they must be deciding my brother's fate. When I heard a noise at the bedroom door, I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep. Gabriel kissed me softly on the cheek and before long I began to hear his snoring.
The week passed quickly. I could see that there were more men in the mansion than usual. Every day more arrived. I learned that my father-in-law was taking precautions. Marcos could be seen in the garden talking to a different man every hour. He didn't realize that he was being closely watched. Guided by my father and father-in-law, I went back to the swing set to give Marcos my answer. I didn't want him to be killed. But I didn't know how to protect him from this end, if he tried to hurt the child who was the most precious treasure to his father and father-in-law. I thought about warning him, but Gabriel might not forgive me. And I couldn't live a life without him. While I was thinking these things, Marcos joined me as he had the other time. His countenance was peaceful.
"What did Gabriel think of my plans?" He asked as if talking about the weather. I looked startled at him.
"I don't know what you are talking about."
"Don't insult my intelligence Eloisa. I knew I would tell Gabriel my plans. But that doesn't guarantee that he will come out unscathed. I also realize that you have surrounded yourselves with more men and that it has become almost impossible to get anywhere near your son without having about three goons watching. Do you know what that means?"
"Tell me."
"That you have made your choice. And you have chosen the hard way. There will be bloodshed."
"Marcos... Leave while there is time. You will be killed and so will your wife. There is not the slightest possibility that I will abandon my husband. I never thought about it. Don't you love anyone? Is only your wife of value to you? Do you really have the courage to hurt me and our father? And your nephew?
Marcos remained in meditative silence for a few minutes and I respected him. I knew he was weighing what was most important to him.
"If Gabriel was wounded and deformed in his beauty, would you still love him as you do now that he is perfect? Would you not seek revenge against the one who did this to your beloved?"
"Yes. I would still love him. Because I don't just love his appearance. I love his soul and no one can deform a soul. And really I would seek revenge if someone hurt him, but not for me, but for having caused him pain."
"Then you know that I am in a very difficult position. But I must confess to you that I do not love my wife. I only married her out of pity and because of pressure from her father. As soon as I saw her deformed, the charm ended. But it was too late to turn back. That's why I was angry with you and Dad. It was as if you punished me by making me marry a... freak. Why didn't you kill her?"
"Wouldn't you seek revenge the same way or even worse if we had taken her life?"
"Yes. I would believe they had stolen my happiness. But today I would be free to fall in love again..."
"Do you have children?"
"No. The few times I am forced to lie with her, I imagine the face of another woman. I don't want to have children with her. I use protection. I spend most of my time taking care of my father-in-law's business. He believes I am very hardworking and doesn't even suspect that I take care of his business to exhaustion so that I don't have to find my wife anxious for me, still awake..."
"Then get rid of her. Send her back and stay here with us. You can marry again. Maybe the woman who will win your heart is not here.
"I can't abandon her. She would fall apart."
"Maybe not. Maybe that's all that's missing for her to meet someone who truly loves her and wants to have children with her. Your attitude is selfish. You don't allow her to be happy, and neither do you yourself. Maybe she doesn't love you either and only stays by your side out of gratitude."
Marcos was thoughtful again and then stood up.
"I need to think." He said and walked away.
I went back inside the house as well. I wanted to tell Gabriel that Marcos was confused, but I couldn't find him anywhere. One of the servants said he was in the small park that was on one side of the mansion frequented by his father-in-law and where the child was raised. I was curious for the first time to see, even from a distance, my husband's relationship with the child I didn't even know the name of. I went to the child's room that I knew had a window overlooking the park. I went in and looked around. There were many toys scattered around the room and the smell in the room was pleasant. I approached the window and what I saw at first made me freeze, but then I was transformed. I felt that my actions from then on would be commanded by a crazy person, without any reasoning. Gabriel had his back to me and was talking to a girl who was holding a child in her arms. He raised his hand and began to play with a curl of her hair. She was beautiful. She was blushing with laughter at what he was telling her. They looked like a couple in love. She could not believe it, but Gabriel was flirting with the nanny. God only knew if they hadn't already been in bed and since when they had a romance.
Blind with hatred and jealousy I went to the kitchen and got a very sharp knife. The maids who were there didn't ask any questions. I don't think they even realized that I took something from the kitchen. I went to the child's room and waited in a corner where hardly anyone could see me, because the daylight was not there. The nanny's small bed was next to the crib. Time went by and it got dark. I didn't feel tired. I was just anxious. The night tried to hide me better in the corner I had chosen. The nanny came in with the sleeping child in her arms and slowly put her in the crib and covered her. I was about to attack her when the door opened again. Gabriel came in and went over to the crib and stroked the sleeping child, without turning on the light. Then without saying anything the nanny threw herself into his arms and they kissed. My tears streamed down my face like a waterfall. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. All that talk about family loyalty was just a decoy. Imagining this scene was different from seeing it come true. They undressed and went to the small bed where they loved each other shamelessly, like former lovers who knew every part of each other's bodies. The tears gradually stopped. The pain I felt was mixed with anger. I knew what had to be done, and I would do it. Gabriel got up, got dressed and slowly left the room. The nanny remained asleep. I approached her. And before she could wake up, I plunged the knife into her heart, covering her mouth so that it made no noise. As soon as I saw the life in her wide-open eyes, I let her go. But a thought began to grow inside me. There would be others. I needed to exterminate the root of the problem. That's how I turned to the cradle. That child could not continue to exist. It had already taken too many things from me, and now even my husband's fidelity. I went to him. He was sleeping, but I could see the resemblance to Gabriel. For the first time I touched his face. I asked him softly to forgive me and just as I had done with the nanny, I did with him too. Then I hurried out of the room and hid the bloody knife among my things. Then I would disappear with it. I changed and went to the dining room where everyone should be waiting for me.
Gabriel smiled when he saw me, and I smiled back. I never imagined that he could be so hypocritical and naive. My smile was one of victory, for having discovered his filthy secret and put an end to it. I sat down at the table and feasted. It had been a long time since I had eaten so well. Gabriel approved of my good mood and when we went to the bedroom, he loved me as if for the first time. And we repeated our moments of pleasure several times. I was curious how he could have such enthusiasm for me after he had lain with the nanny. He loved her several times too. However, I didn't want to think about that anymore. Gabriel would now be mine alone. I didn't have to worry about any more escapades.
The next day, first thing in the morning, we woke up embracing. I kissed his lips lightly and went into the shower. I was happy. I knew that from that day on, Gabriel would spend more time by my side. There was no longer anything between us. I felt light. Nothing to prevent our total surrender to each other. At least that's what I thought.
When I came out of the shower, Gabriel was sitting on the bed, his hands covering his face. I slowly approached him and touched his shoulder. He lifted his head and I saw that he was crying. He pulled me to himself and wept on my shoulder, hugging me. He could only have found out that his mistress died and so did the child. But I had to act as if I knew nothing.
"What happened Gabriel? You're scaring me..."
He turned away from me and faced me with such deep sadness that I almost regretted what I had done. I knew those tears were produced as a consequence of my actions, but I would make him very happy to make it up to him.
"They killed our son." He said with his voice embittered. "They found him and the nanny dead this morning."
"What do you mean? Who told you that?" I asked to disguise it, but I was really upset about Gabriel's pain and it made me glad that I had taken the other loves out of his life. Now he had only me.
"The girl's fiancé. He went looking for her earlier today, as he always did, and found them dead. Someone very cowardly stabbed them in their sleep."
"I didn't know the nanny had a fiancé..." So she was the mistress of a man having a fiancé. Her death was well deserved. I thought as he spoke to me.
"I never told you anything because you didn't like any subject involving our son. But I always choose the people who work with me very well and of course I would be careful with my son's nanny. She was engaged to my cousin. They were to be married in three months. He even moved here to be closer to her." He said with tears rolling down his face.
"How come I've never seen him around?" That news surprised me.
"He arrived yesterday morning. He was dying to meet his fiancée and spend some time with her, so he didn't make his meals with us. We were going to introduce him to you today. However he was at our wedding, but there were so many people that I think you must not have realized that he shook your hand on that occasion..."
I was silent. So it was a double-cross. Gabriel had betrayed me and also his cousin. He really deserved the pain he must have been feeling at that moment. I got up and went to change. I saw him go into the bathroom and heard him turn on the shower. I put on a black dress and went downstairs for coffee. For all intents and purposes, I had to keep up appearances for the family that would be arriving soon. Back at the mansion everyone knew that I rejected my son, but it was a closed secret within those walls. Dad was at the table, but he wasn't eating anything. Tears blurred his vision. He said nothing when he saw me. For him I felt pity. He didn't deserve that pain. Soon Marcos appeared too. He had been warned of what had happened and came to pay his respects. It wouldn't be long before people there started to blame him. I started to drink my coffee slowly. I wasn't very good at faking sadness, but I had to try. Gabriel didn't show up for breakfast. Soon my father-in-law appeared and guided us to the chapel on the property. Both bodies were there. When we arrived, I saw Gabriel shamelessly lying and weeping on the coffin of his mistress. I went forward to pull him out and slap him right there in the presence of everyone. This was already too much! He had to keep a low profile. But as soon as I pulled him by the shoulder, I discovered that this was not Gabriel. He was the same size, had the same haircut and wore similar clothes, but despite the resemblance, he was definitely not Gabriel. He stared at me confused and I believe mirroring my gaze. The feeling that I had made a rash move surrounded me in a way that I thought I was going to faint. He was the one I saw with the nanny and I was confused. When I became aware of my grave mistake, I knew that I would be punished, maybe they would never find out, but my conscience would never stop accusing me of having killed an innocent young girl who was transmitting care and love to a child that it was my duty to take care of.
They must have realized that I was not well, because some people came up to me and supported me. I thought they would carry me out of there, but no. They were Gabriel's relatives and they believed that the sight of the dead girl had shaken me, but I had not even seen her. They took me to the other coffin. Taking care to stay each one on one side of me, to support me. Gabriel was not there, and I began to speculate in my mind where he was, for I knew that he would want to stay as close to his son as possible. His absence was not normal. Something told me that he was thinking about doing something crazy, somewhere in the house, and I was worried. I didn't want to look, but I knew my husband's family would not understand. Then I saw the small mahogany coffin. I walked over and looked at it. He seemed to be sleeping. For the first time I felt like seeing him open his eyes and smile. Things he would never do again, because of me. I took that away from him. I knew he was a happy child, because I always heard his laughter at his grandfathers' silly pranks. I couldn't bear that sight any longer. It was torturing me. I didn't even know if he had inherited Gabriel's eye color. I could have loved him, if I hadn't been so stupid and selfish.
I was about to run out of there, when Gabriel surrounded the entrance together with the house security guards, with a look of hatred and in his hands the bloody knife that I had kept among my belongings. I thought I would die right there.
He stared at me and I saw that there were several feelings in his eyes. I saw questioning, pain, love and hate. The people around were not understanding what was happening.
"Why did you do that?" He asked between tears. "I kept him away from you so he wouldn't upset you.... I did everything so he wouldn't get to you.... What happened? Did he escape?"
I thought about denying that it belonged to me, but they wouldn't believe me, so I lifted my chin resolutely. If I was to die, I would die with my head held high.
"I saw your cousin with her yesterday and believed it was you.... You are so much alike. I'm sorry I made that mistake."
Gabriel's cousin tried to advance on me when I said those words, but people held him back. I looked and saw that everyone was staring at me and had already condemned me to death, the hatred in their eyes left no doubt, but they also wanted to know my motives, so they held the boy. Not to protect me. But to give me a punishment according to the way I had killed them.
Gabriel had lowered his head and was looking at the knife in his hand. He seemed distracted, but he was not. He was just doing his best to understand me. To understand what I did.
"Did you think I was cheating on you? Did I ever give you reason to distrust my loyalty?"
I realized that he was now thinking that I was trying to throw the blame on him.
"Not with attitudes. But when he said that the child called the nanny his mother, I could sense that he had affection for her. And at the time, I was already jealous..."
"My son called her his mother, because that's what she was to him. May she continue to be now in the afterlife. As for speaking of her with affection. Don't you come to like those who treat those they love with care and affection? Besides she would very soon be family..."
"That didn't occur to me."
"So you killed her because you were jealous of me.... But what about the child? Why did you have to take him away from me?" He asked with tears again wetting his face.
I took a deep breath.
"He stood between the two of us.... Look what I was made to do because of him? Look at all this tragedy! He should never have come into the world. It was a mistake. One I would never make again."
"You put the blame on him? You are more vile than anyone I know..." He said shaking his head. "How did you kill them so quietly? No one heard screams.... Did you torture them?" he asked with a pained look on his face.
"I didn't torture them. If I had done that the whole house, all the wards would hear their screams. I hid in the place where the sun doesn't shine and night came and they didn't see me, because they didn't turn on the light. I guess so as not to disturb the child who had already entered the rooms sleeping. So as soon as her cousin left the room, I went to her first and stuck the knife in her heart. Then I went to the boy and did the same."
Everyone was wide-eyed with surprise. The mother had killed her own son and told it very coldly. Only Gabriel stared at me with hatred. He knew that the boy meant nothing to me.
"You'll pay for that." He said and walked away.
My father-in-law's men came in and took me away. They locked me in my room. Probably while they were deciding my fate. I was done with everything. I sat up in bed. Gabriel would never forgive me. And he was all I wanted, so if they killed me I wouldn't care. I didn't know what to do with my life without my beloved. It would even be a better fate than alive, but without him. I knew it was crazy, but I still believed in the possibility that Gabriel would walk through that door and make peace with me.
The door opened after a few hours and Marcos entered. He sat next to me on the bed and looked worried. I could see that, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything else.
"Eloisa..." Marcos began to speak clumsily. "We have to leave here today. They don't want me, you, or even Dad here, because of you. Our blood is now rejected by Gabriel's family. They don't even want you killed here in their land. We have already contacted an ally in Colombia. Prepare your suitcase. Papa is already taking care of everything else."
"I can't leave without talking to Gabriel first." I said hoping he would forgive me and give me another chance. I was even willing to give him another child, and this time take care of the child along with him. "And they will always have my blood on their land. My son will be buried here."
"Gabriel is nowhere to be found in the mansion. His father-in-law has already posted men to search for him. But we cannot wait. And I believe you are the last person he wants to see. His cousin is pacing up and down the corridor with the same knife you used to kill the girl and your own son. They are sending the child to another country for burial. It won't stay here. I'm sorry, Eloisa, but this is unforgivable. How could you murder your own son in cold blood? I've seen you torture people before, but the child was innocent. He was your son! And you took his life..."
"Marcos, I believed that because of him, Gabriel was cheating on me with the young nanny. I acted on an impulse. I am sorry."
"Your regret won't bring them back." Marcos said and stood up going to the clothes closet and opening it. He started taking off my clothes and throwing them on the bed. Then he picked up some suitcases on top of it and brought them over to the bed, where he started throwing the clothes anyway.
"What about your wife?"
"I was honest with you when I said I didn't love her. I shipped her off to my father-in-law's house, with the excuse that she was in danger here. We will start a new life, Eloisa. In a new country. With new people. We will be able to marry again with other people, we will change our names and be happy. We must leave the past behind."
"I don't know how to live without Gabriel."
"Don't talk nonsense. Do you think he won't remake his life next to another woman? One who will give him many children? His father-in-law, right now, is probably arranging another bride for him."
"I will kill anyone who comes near him. Gabriel is mine!"
"It is no longer. As if."
"I can still give him the large family that Gabriel so longs for. I can give him more children and this time..."
"Shut your damn mouth, you stupid bitch! Do you really think Gabriel is going to go back to bed with the murderer of his son? Do you know how many beautiful women, younger than you, are probably already lining up to fulfill his dream? Stop talking crazy and come help me. It's over! And it was you who put a stop to it.
My bags were packed and Marco went to the door, where he looked both ways down the hall, sticking his head out. He was satisfied and motioned for me to follow him. I followed him. The hallway was empty. I was surprised that we managed to leave the mansion without running into anyone. I didn't know that this was because they didn't want to put their eyes on me anymore, after their decision not to kill me here. Still, that meant they would do it when I was out of their country. Marcos was walking fast and I had to run to keep up with him. We passed through the garden and went to the mansion's garage. And just there we found a barrier. Gabriel had his gun pointed at me, as tears rolled down his face. I could imagine his pain and stared at him trying to make him understand by my gaze my regret. My desire to start all over again and do it differently. Marcos was saying something to him, but he was concentrating on me. Neither of us could hear what my brother was saying. I heard the sound of the first shot and saw Marcos fall beside me. I heard my name yelled urgently and looked back. My father was running towards me. I heard another shot and felt something penetrate my chest burning like burning embers and I turned to Gabriel. I stared at him wide-eyed as I ran my hand over the place where I was bleeding and looked at the blood on my hands. Gabriel pointing the gun at his own head was my last sight.
I removed my hand from the mirror and stared at Gabriel. This time burdened with guilt in my soul. I was capable of killing my own son. And consequently, everyone I loved. I really had no justification to relieve that pain. Gabriel stared at me with angry eyes. He didn't even feel sadness anymore. Only a desire for revenge.
"Gabriel... Nothing I can say will lessen the pain I put you through. But that pain is mine too. He was my son too."
Gabriel smiled wryly.
"Your pain too? You don't even know what color eyes our son had. You are the worst part of me. If we were separated at any time, you are the part I wish didn't exist."
"What are you talking about?"
"It doesn't matter anymore."
"I really was willing to give you the family you wanted..."
"You still don't understand, do you? How did you expect me to still stay with you after all you've done? There was no such chance. As your brother said, you put an end to our life. And I loved you so much in this life that... I closed my eyes to your indifference to your own son. I knew it wasn't normal, but I wanted you with all my strength."
"Gabriel... I don't understand why we had to meet in all our lives.... What are we anyway? Pawns doomed to repeat the same mistakes forever? To what end? It didn't do us any good. On the contrary... Our encounters have broken our souls into little pieces..." I said and something occurred to me, but it was so incredible, it was so sensational that I didn't even repeat it to Gabriel, but I began to suspect that that link that always connected us both now and in other lives, was not by chance. Could there be a possibility that we were soul mates?
"I already told you that there is a cycle that must be broken. It was meant to be. But I have to get through being with you. Or at least let it pass until the end, but my end has always been suicide. At least in the lives that I have found you. I don't think it is possible to stop this cycle. You don't change. You don't learn. You just grieve for your past and believe like Eloisa that you have a way back..." He said raising his hands in a gesture of surrender.
"I didn't agree with what she did, but she could have had a second chance..."
"Not her. You. You are Eloisa. And all those lives we've spent you think it was for what? To give you second chances!"
"But with the lost memories..."
"Whatever the world, we were born marked. We were marked by the mistakes of the past. Our critical sense and sense of justice grew stronger and stronger and we were born with it, but you always ignored it. Because your essence is pure selfishness. You might not even commit murder, but seeing something you ardently desire, you would set aside your principles and make the same mistakes."
"But I am not those women. Not anymore."
"Then they must be me. Are you remembering my memories as if you were me?"
"I didn't express myself right. I ... I'm not like those women anymore. I've changed."
Gabriel stared at me clearly dumbfounded.
"No. You haven't changed."
"How can you say that? You are not inside me. You don't know my feelings."
"But I do know your past. It was always repeating itself."
"Are you saying that even though I know everything I know now, I was born and killed again?"
"Yes. I wanted to spare myself because when you remember a past I relive the storm of that life. But see for yourself what you did in the next life."
In a stubborn gesture of defiance, I put my hand back on the mirror.