Chapter 5 - Well Met, Mr. Mercenary

Fantasyland, or Fantalasia (as its modern inhabitants like to call it) is divided into nine regions. First, are the two northern regions, Friglands in the northwest, and Drablands in the northeast. Just below, are the Midlands, West and East. Then off to the eastern coast, the Eastlands. There's the capital of Fantalia and just below it, surrounding it almost, are the Wilderlands. Lastly, on the arm of land branching out in the southwest, lay the Mistlands.

In all that vastness, one could surely find someplace to call her own if she really wanted. The only question was, where to go?

Not the capital, of course, unless Phanny was feeling particularly bold and wanted to hide from the Imperial Government right under their noses. Phanny was many things, but bold has never been one of them. She couldn't stay in the Wilderlands, there were too many people who knew her there. She also couldn't go so far north on her own. Who knew what manner of man and beast she would encounter on the way? So, West Midlands? Or the Mistlands?

Oh, boy, here we go. At this point, this narrator can only roll her eyes. Bold, Phanny was not. But indecisive? That, she was.

So it happened that our unfortunate heroine, newly homeless, totally alone, and helpless as a newborn babe, found herself in the dark Wilderland Woods, hiding under baneberry bushes, still dripping wet and as good as lost.

As she continued to dither and dally and drip pondwater, Phanny started to hear horse's hooves getting closer. She shrank further behind the baneberry bush and peeked through a gap between the leaves, just in time to see two men jump off a black horse in the middle of the forest path. They stood there facing each other, seemingly engaged in a heated discussion.

One of them was a dark-skinned dwarf, with a black ponytail and cropped beard, taller than most dwarves, almost four feet, and heavily muscled. He was only wearing a brown leather vest, and Phanny could see burn scars snaking down his left arm. Across him, stood a much taller man, wearing black trousers and dusty, black, leather boots. All Phanny could see were his bottom half, but judging from his thigh girth, he must be quite large. Far larger than Phanny, that's for sure.

They both looked very dangerous. And as much as Phanny surprised herself by managing to outrun and hide from the Imperial guards earlier, she wasn't sure she could do it twice in a single day. She could only pray to the gods that they wouldn't discover her.

"This ain't what we discussed, Wilder. We said half," said the dwarf.

"That was before," said the other man, in a deep growl that had Phanny curling her toes, "you tried to sell me out."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" The dwarf's eyes turned cagey. 𝐻𝑒'𝑠 𝑙𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔, thought Phanny.

"You don't?" The other man drawled, unconvinced as well. "Then I suppose the Wilder Guards showing up was just a coincidence?"

"I don't know! I don't know why they're here. I'm no rat."

The other man stepped closer to the dwarf, close enough that the dwarf had to tip his head all the way up to look at him.

"Don't test me, Burns." He said, barely above a whisper. "You know how I work. You know what I do to those who cross me."

Burns gulped. "Alright, alright. It was me. I told them. But you have to understand, Wilder. It's desperate times, one neighbor or another's trying to sell me and me family to those royal hounds. Amelia and I are trying to get the young 'uns to Draconia. The passage alone is 2 gold each, who knows how much I'll need to start fresh over there. And," Burns continued, "The Duke of Wilder's put a big prize on your head."

Phanny was starting to feel sorry for Mr. Burns. He was right, after all. It was quite desperate times. Mr. Wilder must be feeling sorry, too. She hoped he'd give him his half.

"It's not my fucking problem, Burns. I'm not the one who decided to have 10 children." Wilder growled.

"You know it's five! And you better give me, me damned half, Wilder. I deserve it. I'm the one we sold. Don't be such a jackass."

They were starting to raise their voices again.

"I got you out. All you had to do was sit tight. You should be thanking the gods I'm letting you walk away with 10, you fucking-"

Abrupt silence. They turned their heads towards… Phanny's baneberry bush? She didn't dare move an inch. Did she accidentally make a sound earlier?

"What was that?" Wilder's dusty, black boots were now pointed towards Phanny, slowly moving closer.

"Are you working with someone?" He said in a menacing whisper, continuing to move slowly towards her.

"What! No!" answered the dwarf.

Just as Phanny was getting ready to bolt, a large shadow was falling over her, and a hand had snaked out to grab her shoulder and pull her up. She suddenly found herself staring into hard, gray eyes, and the most handsome face she's ever seen.

In the dimness of the forest, his gray eyes almost seemed to glow against his sun-tanned skin and perfectly chiseled features. His black brows were drawn low over his eyes in a fierce, straight line. Dark, curly hair fell messily over his forehead, and Phanny thought she could see a trace of a scar slicing down the tip of his left eyebrow down to the corner of his eye. He looked just like the heroic dark knight of Phanny's girlish fantasies.

"Who are you?" He asked in that deep, gruff voice.

𝐸𝑥𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑛𝑜𝑤, she thought, ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑣𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑛. She tried to wriggle out of his grasp, but that just made him tighten his grip on her shoulder, almost painfully.

"Nobody!" she said. "I mean, Phanny. Just Phanny. I'm not working with anybody! I've never seen either of you in my life! Please let me go!" In her fear, Phanny blurted out more words than she usually speaks in a whole day to one person (of course, she usually chatters endlessly to the cat, and the dog, and the cow, and the mare, and the chickens).

He squinted his gray eyes at her. To figure out if she was lying, she supposed. But for a moment she forgot to be afraid, because she was too busy appreciating the effect squinting had on his handsome face.

Before he could interrogate her further, they heard the sound of more hooves approaching.

"Please help me, they can't find me." She whispered, panic rising inside her once again.

She could see the indecision warring in his eyes.

"Damn it." He muttered, before pushing her back down behind the bush. She was promptly joined by Mr. Burns.

"Hullo there, miss." He whispered to her as they crouched side by side. "Don't worry, Wilder won't let us get found."

In a moment, she could hear horses, and men's voices getting closer and closer. Wilder stood in front of the bushes, between them and the new arrivals, effectively blocking her peephole in the bushes.

"Who goes there?" The confident, booming voice could only belong to an Imperial Guard, thought Phanny, who was starting to tremble.

"Just a traveler. On my way home to Wilderwhig after selling a dwarf to you men." Wilder answered.

"What are you doing off your horse, traveler?"

"Just stopped to take a piss, 𝑠𝑖𝑟." Surely, Wilder was trying his best to act humble before the guards but, Phanny thought, he wasn't doing a very good job. Actually, Phanny was afraid he was endangering all their lives with that lazy insolence in his tone.

"Did you see a mermaid pass through here?" The booming voice asked.

"A mermaid?" Wilder sounded amused. "Walking around the Wilderland Woods?"

"Yes- ah, she grows legs out of water. If you saw her, she probably looked like a girl. Blue dress? Long black hair?"

A pause. Phanny hugged her knees tight to her chest in a vain attempt to keep from trembling.

"A girl… Now, if it's about a girl, I might remember with something to help jog my memory." Wilder drawled.

The mercenary! Was he going to sell her off? She was about to move to sprint, but Mr. Burns held her down. He held a finger to his lips to tell her to be quiet. Could she trust them?

The guard Wilder was talking to sighed. Then Phanny heard the unmistakable jingle of coins in a purse, thrown in the air and caught.

"That's five gold, traveler. You're a rich man. Now, speak," demanded the guard.

"Was she, perhaps, very wet?" He asked.

"That's her! Where did you see her?" A horse neighed, sensing his rider's excitement.

"You've already rode past. I saw her a few ways back, in the fork in the path. She was asking directions to Womberley, and I kindly pointed the way."

"Alright, men!" The guard boomed. "You heard the fellow, off we go! Safe travels, man. Gods be with ye."

"Gods be with ye," muttered Wilder.

They waited until the sound of the horses had gone, before standing up. In Phanny's haste, the blood rushed to her head, and she felt dizzy. She almost fell forward into the baneberry bush, if not for a strong pair of arms catching her elbows and steadying her just in time.

She looked up at gray eyes and felt her cheeks flush. Was she blushing? Oh, good gods. Wilder's brows were knitted together in what Phanny could only guess was mild annoyance. Right. She moved away from him and cleared her throat.

"S-sorry." She mumbled, unable to look him in the eyes now. "And thanks, for getting rid of them. I really appreciate it."

"Well," said Mr. Burns, cutting through the awkwardness. "I s'pose it's best to get moving. More of those hounds might come sniffing."

Burns and Wilder turned to go.

"W-wait!" Phanny said, making the men turn back to look at her curiously.

"I-" she swallowed. "I have nowhere to go."

The men shared a look, before Wilder shrugged. "Your call, Burns."

Burns looked back at Phanny, who seemed at that moment, very pitiful indeed. Like a baby chick who got lost in the rain.

"Oh, what the hell," he said, throwing his hands up. "Let's take the lass."