I'm humming happily as we head over to David and Alyssa's to visit, looking at my ring. It's so beautiful.
I shift in my seat and feel the pleasurable ache between my legs from this morning. Brian was such a beast ... I loved it. The things this man does to me...
Turning to look at his sexy profile, he catches me and grins that toothy smile of his.
"You're staring at me with such dreamy eyes."
"Can't help it, you know. I've got the man of my dreams, why would I not look at you with dreamy eyes?" I bat my eyelashes up at him as we arrive.
We get out and notice Amanda walking out with her phone up to her ear. Then my phone starts going off. I pull it out and see it's Amanda who hangs up motioning for us to come. I rush over and can see she's upset.
"Mandie, what's the matter? What's wrong?" Brian asks her, but I just make my way inside to David's room where I find Alyssa and the twins with him. David weakly says hello to me and I rush over to them.
"What's the matter?" I grip his hand which he weakly tightens his hold on mine for a moment and turns to Alyssa.
Alyssa takes a deep shaky breath, "He's not been feeling well the past few days. His oxygen levels are way down, even though he's on oxygen all the time. He's been in a lot of pain too. He just got some pain medicine right now, so he's a little out of it." She blinks and takes another breath as a tear falls down her face. "I'm just making sure were here with him as much as we can be right now. It's not looking good, Sarina." More tears fall from her as she holds one of the twins in her arms, the other nestled between her and David.
I look at David who's eyes keep falling shut but he opens them wider when he seems to focus on me, "Sis..." He says weakly, "congratulations..." he taps my hand with my ring on it, and gives me a weak smile.
I can't say anything, I just look at my brother and feel like this can't be real. It can't be, he can't die. He's my brother, he's supposed to always be here for me.
"I love you..." I finally choke out. Then the tears start falling.
"No cry..." David says weakly. "love you." His eyes won't stay open anymore.
"David?" My heart sinks.
"He's just sleeping, he's still breathing." Alyssa reassures me, making me take some deeper breaths trying to calm myself.
I feel like I'm going to faint though, I feel like I can't breathe. Brian's arms wrap around me and hold me up as I sink into them.
"Deep breaths, Sarina. I've got you." He speaks softly to me. I turn in his arm and grip onto him as more tears leak out of me. "He's not gone, don't cry right now... baby." He holds me tightly, his own voice pained as I sob, in his arms. After a few minutes, I'm able to calm down and step away from him.
I walk out of the room to see Amanda sitting down on the sofa, just staring off into space.
"He's been like this for days?" I ask her as I sit down next to her.
Amanda nods. "We were going to let you know yesterday, but David said not to. That you were still coming back from your trip and you'd be here today. Normally, you're here earlier. That's why I was calling you when you showed up."
I grimace, "I would have been here yesterday night if I would have known. Why does he not want to tell me things when they're important?" My tears start afresh, remembering how long he knew he had cancer before I was told. Something else springs to mind though too.
He knew how much I regretted throwing the first ring I was proud of that I had made, my grandmothers ring, in the trash for years. How it tore me up that I had been so angry at my mothers cruel words and my anger at my mother triggered me to do it. I'm glad he did save it, but he couldn't have told me sooner? That was years ago and he's had it all this time?
Then back in high school, he kept from me that guys that I liked, had liked me too. Instead he told me they were just nice to me to my face and talked crap about me behind my back. He had come clean to me, years later, saying that he just didn't think they were good enough for me. I start thinking of all the things he's kept from me, like I could not handle the truth or wasn't worth being told.
It hurts.
I clench my fists, angry and disappointed that he didn't let anyone say anything. This was the whole reason I wanted to wait to go on a trip! I knew something was going to happen when I wasn't around!
Brian comes walking out, holding the twin Kara, bringing her over to the changing table. She's fussy as soon as he sets her down, but when he starts talking to her in the baby talk all adults seem to revert to when handling a baby. Kara pauses and gives him a look like he's crazy before breaking out in a wide gummy smile. Watching him change her, how they interact, lightens my mood, realizing everyone's right. He'll be a great father.
He gets her changed, still cooing and making her toss her arms and legs out in excitement. She spits out little bubbles, making baby noise that sound like gurgles. She kicks out and gets Brian right in the jaw, making him gasp and Kara giggle.
Brian shakes his head and turns towards me, catching me staring and smiles. His eyes twinkle at me knowingly before Kara fusses and kicks Brian again. The second Brian turns his attention back to her, she's smiling again.
"Looks like you got some competition there, Sarina. Kara is putting the moves on him already." Amanda nods towards them.
Brian scoffs, "That's not true, she just loves her uncle. That's all." He picks her up and takes her back into the room with Alyssa, David and Keith, her twin brother.
I turn to Amanda, "Amanda, please, I don't care what David says from here on out, please tell me if things go any farther south."
Amanda looks guilty at that moment.
"What, what is it?" I ask, knowing she's wanting to say something else.
"I overheard the doctor and nurse talking to him. They told him he has a few weeks left at most. The last tests he did last Monday all show that it's now spread from his lungs, stomach, pancreas, liver, his bones, glands, intestines, and his spinal cord. They're surprised he's lived so well till now. Since he's in so much pain now, though, they're just telling us to make sure he has enough morphine and antidepressants. That there's nothing more that can be done, except sedate him, so he's not hurting." Amanda blinks back her tears.
"You know I always thought of David as an ass, but ..." Her voice catches, "I've never seen my sister so happy... we're all devastated right now. Please know, you're not alone. We're just as much your family as he is ours."
I give Amanda a hug, unable to speak at the moment. I hope she knows I'm saying thank you. Brian comes back out with Keith at that moment and stops.
"Oh I see how it is...." He says raising a brow.
Confused, I narrow my eyes at him, "How what is?"
"Kara steals my attention, so you pay me back by making me jealous with you hanging all over Amanda." He fights back a smile as he says so and I can't help but roll my eyes at him.
"Oh, yes. Me and Amanda just decided to run away and elope." I make sure I have added as much sarcasm as I can, leaning back against Amanda's shoulder. "We're just meant to be."
Amanda scoffs, leaning back, "As if. Ya'll keep me out of your relationship drama. I'm perfectly happy with my Dass."
I sigh and flop myself back against the sofa cushion, "Scorned again for another woman." I cover my eyes dramatically.
Brian laughs, "Come here baby, help out Alyssa please. She needs to feed the kids and is probably feeding Kara by now."
I join him, helping change Keith's diaper, who smiles and gums his balled up fists, kicking his feet out. We're wiping him down when he makes a face and a fountain starts shooting out of him.
"Oh my gosh!" I throw a wet wipe over it, even though it's too late for Brian's shirt. I look at him as he looks at his shirt.
"Ha...HA..HaHAHAHa!" I can't help it, I just start gripping my sides and laughing at Brian.
Even Amanda is laughing, "HAha! You're officially Uncle Brian now! That little shit has got every single one of us now!" She pulls out her phone and takes a picture of Brian who gives her a scowl in return.
I finally stop laughing and pat his shoulder. "I'll go grab a shirt from your gym bag babe."