Edmon Zenith
The drive back home was silent. Belle was asleep on my lap and Kiara was slightly humming to herself while looking out the window. This let me drift my thoughts back to the doctor. Just like before we couldn't talk. We didn't get the chance to. But I am determined. In our next appointment, I will make sure I talk to him before I explode with all these feelings inside of me. Because as much as I hate to admit it, nobody has ever made me feel like this, not even one-tenth of it. This eagerness to meet him, this anxiousness about what I am gonna say to him, this fear of being rejected, and the last but the most potent of them all, this jealousy about him being somebody's already is so new to me. I've never been jealous before in my thirty-three years of existence, and I am losing control over that now.
Because of him.
I should be scared of how fast all of this is going. How fast my feelings are growing. I barely know the guy. I don't know anything about him except the information that was on his file and I didn't even read half of it. I don't even know if we'll be compatible together or not, whether I'll like him as a person or not, and most vital whether he'll like me as a person or not. The odds aren't in my favor and I should be scared of that but I am not. Instead, I am excited. Eager to know where this will go, where this will take me, how it's gonna turn out, and most importantly how it will make me feel. Would it be the same as now or the spark that has ignited within me will turn into a full-fledged fire and burn me? I don't know but I intend to find out.
But before doing that, I have to take care of Belle. Hopefully, Aiden's prescription will work. She is still asleep when we reach home so I gently pick her up and make my way inside. I carefully lay her down on the couch and turn on the heater. I grab the throw blanket from the corner of the couch and cover her. Kiara also rests next to her and gently massages her scalp which allows her to relax further on the couch. I smile at Kiara and her mother like nature before giving them both a kiss on their forehead and heading towards my room.
Getting in my room, I first call Johnny and cancel all of my meetings for today so that I can take care of Belle. Then I change out of my suit and put on some comfy clothes and head back outside. Belle is still asleep and her head is now on Kiara's lap who is now half asleep. I cover her in a blanket too before going to the kitchen.
I take the ingredients out for some applesauce oatmeal for Belle and carbonara pasta for me and Ki. Belle strongly dislikes the idea of eating bland food so I know I'm gonna have to face a tantrum later but I couldn't care now. She needs to eat something that will stay down and she can digest.
I prepare the dishes while checking on them from time to time. If someone ever saw me like that, they won't believe that they are seeing a mafia don. Even though I can not believe this sometimes. But it's okay because they are the ones who are keeping me humane. I'd do anything for them.
Halfway through the cooking, Kiara comes into the kitchen. She smiles lazily for a second before snuggling into my chest. I cuddle her and place a kiss on top of her head. She becomes very cuddly after a nap but I don mind giving her that. Five minutes later she wakes up fully and helps me with a few things around the kitchen.
Once the food is ready, we arrange it on the table and I then make my way to wake my princess up. With a little fuss, I manage to wake her up and settle her down in her high chair. As expected she refuses to eat the bland food. I try the airplane method and the animal method but she just doesn't eat.
That's when an idea suddenly pops into my mind. I bring a few nuts and berries from the kitchen and decorate the oatmeal with them, making a few smiley faces here and there and randomly dropping berries in between. Overall it looked okay.
I sigh in relief as I watch Belle's face light up upon seeing the now-decorated food. She looks a lot less hesitant when I try to feed her again. With every bite, I get a piece of nut or a berry and I eventually feed her the whole bowl while eating my pasta in between.
It is a technique that I saw Aiden use on Belle twice. Once when he did her hair and next when he decorated that stethoscope. All that taught me that Belle will love anything that is decorated. She is fascinated by it. And today I put it to the test and used it to my advantage. It worked. The doctor's seemingly making my life easier. First with her hair and now this.
Once all the food finishes, I give Belle her medicines. Thankfully, it's just some syrups so I manage to feed them to her without a fuss while Kiara puts away the dishes. I don't use the nebuliser now since she just ate and might throw up.
We all then snuggle together on the couch in a big pile of blankets and Kiara joins us later after having done all of her chores. We watch a random kids' movie. Once I start feeling both of them getting heavy against me I gently manoeuvre myself out of the pile and carry Kiara to her bedroom. I tuck her in and with a kiss on her forehead, I shut her bedroom door.
Since Belle will need my attention throughout the night, I put her in my room. After making sure that everything is turned off, I head back inside. And as soon as I lay on the bed Belle rolled on her side and top of me and sleeps there peacefully. I chuckle silently before wrapping my arms around her and drifting off to a peaceful slumber.
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Surprisingly, Belle slept through the night. When I open my eyes the next morning she was still laying in the same spot as the night before. She probably didn't even move an inch. That was partially due to my arm that was holding her there securely. I gently start to wake her up. She groans and nuzzles herself closer to me. I rub circles on her back and kiss her head in between, and after a few minutes, she starts to wake up.
"Good morning princess."
"Good mornin' uncle." She whisper-yawns cutely. She still has a stuffed nose but that can be handled later. I let her wake up a bit more before peppering kisses all over her face. She giggles loudly and makes feeble attempts to remove my face but soon her giggling turns into a coughing fit. That compels me to wake up at once.
I brush her teeth and then nebulize her. After a bit of struggle, we manage to get out of the room to find Kiara.
We enter her room after knocking on her door once. She's still fast asleep so I let Belle do her magic of waking Kiara effortlessly. I love how just like me Ki also has a habit of trapping Belle in her arms and snuggling her close. I may not want many things in life but I am grateful for the things that I have. And I am fucking grateful to have Belle and Kiara in my life. I get out of my thinking when Belle tugs at my arm. I join the human pile on the bed and enjoy for a while before I hear roars coming from my babies' stomachs.
I reluctantly get up and grab Belle with me. Kiara stays behind to freshen up. I quickly whip up a simple breakfast for us all with some cranberry juice. After eating breakfast and giving Belle her medicine we go to the playroom. And just like that, we spend the whole day doing nothing, playing, watching tv, and cuddling.
~~~~~~
Great power comes with great responsibilities. And when you are a mob boss you get very little time for yourself. Today is one of those rare days when I get to have a whole day just for myself.
I love my nieces, they are like my own daughters but I crave some quality time with myself. I also enjoy the company of no one but silence and the peace that comes with it because with a schedule as hectic as mine, you need it to maintain your mental peace before you empty a gun in someone's head for the stupidest reason.
That's why we have this rule. Belle and Kiara spend one weekend day with me and the other with my mom and dad, their grandparents. That way I can enjoy some time with them as well as get a day for just myself too. It's not much but it's just enough to keep me on track before I derail. Belle is much better this morning than she was before so I don't feel all that guilty about sending her away to my parents' house plus she also loves spending time with her nana and grandpa so that's a win-win situation for me. And as for Kiara, she has an entirely different reason for visiting her grandparents which I don't quite like but I have no choice but to accept it and understand that she is a grown-up now and I can't do anything about it.
My parents are more than pleased to have their grandchildren spend a weekend with them and I don't blame them. Being the then Don and Donna of the family, they spent very little time with me and my sister when we were young. We didn't blame them though. We knew what it was that they did and what it costs. But I don't want all of this to overpower me and repeat the same mistake. That's why I spend as much time as I can with my nieces.
After dropping them off at my parents, I return home. Since it's ten in the morning I go back to have a long ass sleep.
I wake up to the sound of my phone going off in distance. I groan in annoyance and wait for it to die down so that I can go back to sleep. But just my luck, the thing doesn't stop ringing. I get up half frustrated and half asleep and search for it around the room. After having finally found it in my pants I check the caller ID to see it is Johnny.
"What the hell Johnny!" I shout into the phone.
"Good morning to you too Boss." I can't see him right now but I know that bastard has a smug face right now.
"Just get down to business. What's the matter?" I speak even more annoyingly.
"Well need I remind you that this is the weekend. There is no such thing as a business today."
"Well, then why are you calling me at the ass crack of dawn?"
"You're too grumpy this morning. Were you sleeping?"
"I was before you ruined it."
"Anyway, I just called to remind you that we have to go to a club tonight. Any club. It's mandatory. And I won't take no for an answer. You were the one who suggested it. And I cancelled all my plans for today. So be ready at 7:30-ish. I'll pick you up. B-bye." He hangs up the call before I can argue about it. I groan out loud because I don't want to go anywhere today. I just want to sit back and relax today. But I know Johnny, he will take me with him no matter what. I was the stupid one to suggest it in the first place.
Now that I am awake, I decide to freshen up and have a long relaxing bath. Nothing too fancy, just the perfect hot water and a light melody.
Getting out of the bath, I dry myself and change into some comfy clothing before heading out to eat something. Since I don't want to cook I decide to order food.
Halfway through my meal, I am yet again reminded of Aiden. What is he doing right now? Is he an early bird or does he like to sleep late like me? Is he spending his weekend alone or with someone?
Maybe it will be a good idea, after all, to go to the club. It's exhausting thinking about him and I know that it will become worse if I don't control it now. Our next appointment is on Monday and I need to steer my mind clear of him or else I might go insane. I just want to enjoy my weekend and the only way to do that is to not think about him.
So that's what I am going to do. Not think about him. At all.
And the best way to do that is to get drunk which means I have to go to that place full of drunk and sweaty people. I plan on doing just that.
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