The war started a long time before Rue was born so it was all she had ever know, but they were safe in the massive house behind their massive wall or at least that was what her father had told her.
Her father was the alpha of their pack everyone looked to him for answers, she understood that but to her he was just her dad who he never smiled, ever but he always knew where she was in a room even when she was hiding under the stairs during council meetings he would even wink at her and that's how she knew he loved her most of all. By the time she was twelve she had wiggled herself into the council meeting they all seemed to grudgingly accept her presence as her input had been seen to have "minute value" or at least that was how Sawyer had put it the old cow.
"They have us cornered at the river banks that's fifty men at least" General Alas said his voice a smooth commanding baritone that carried in the quiet room "The others will be on them by morning they don't have a chance"
Rue stood quietly staring at the map on the large stone table covered in figurines mapping battle plan , there was a large mass of what appeared to be water behind where their soldiers stood
"Why not have them cross the river or go up the mountain" she asked looking around the table technically she wasn't allowed to speak but she was here to learn and she had learned It was better to ask for forgiveness than permission
Sawyer scoffed at her
"Because girl..." he leered "That River is scared to the deep water pack and crossing it would mean for certain there would never be an end to this war"
"There will be an end when we win it"
"That is not always the case" Billy said "Mostly a treaty is signed" Her brother said absently pushing hair out of his eyes his mind obviously not on the current discussion, he always seemed to be puzzling something out she never knew what
"A temporary solution at best" she said "We cannot risk the lives of our solders for water our enemies find scared, besides its just water"
"You talk of risk girl you sit for these meetings to learn by your fathers grace, but you have seen no hard ship what is it you understand of grief" said Frances, her pale skin and pale hair made her equally pale amber eyes disconcerting to look at directly and she knew she was not the only one no matter how much her father denied it
"I understand that the families of those solders will light empty pyre for the dead of their loved ones I may be sheltered but I understand enough of the grief of loss, well enough to know that"
At that the room was quiet, no one liked to talk about her mother especially not around her father, she had heard mummers "traitor", "liar" they said those are the words she associated with the woman who birthed her and they confused her, her father was the farthest from those words she could imagine how then could he love her it didn't seem possible to her, but she had a point to make and it would be made.
"They are not our enemies Rue" Her father said "we are at war but we are still of one Blood, their river is scared and we will not cross it"
"Yes, but…" he waved her quiet with his hand
"War is not just about killing Rue and our sacred beliefs are kept as well they do not fight with silver you see, these things as you must know, you are not a member of this council yet, though I assumed you to be mature enough to understand you place here is to observe and learn not argue is that so" he asked though it was not really a question
"Yes sir" she replied her head curtained by her curly black hair her face burning with embarrassment and annoyance, she hated to disappoint him but she knew she was right.
"Good" he said and the meeting continued where it left off only then did she realize he had said yet, not that she would never be a true member but that she was not one yet she peered through her curtain at him, he winked at her and she knew again that he loved her.
Billy just shook his head at them both but she knew he knew he loved him too, but the he swiftly drifted back into his never ending sea of thoughts.
That evening when Rue sat on the rug by the fireplace in her father's study while he was by was book shelf dusting.
"Father?" she called
"Hmm"
"What started the war to begin with?" she asked
"Well no one knows for certain anymore you see there are no more weavers, our now past is as clear as our future"
"but why aren't there anymore weavers, cant we just make more"
"If there was a way, that knowledge is lost with all the rest, you see after the burning of first jungle the weavers left the mountain library then in the Appalachians' locked themselves in and set it on fire, and now it moves all over the world some say you can hear the screams of the weavers as they burned that the black smoke can still been seen in the sky whenever its near, some say its searching"
"What for?"
"Not a clue"
"But do you believe in it"
"Yeah, sometimes"
"Okay" she said and h turned to look at her
"You know you can't just accept what I believe, you should make up your own mind"
"But you're always right"
"There will come a day still"
Rue gave him her most unamused look
"Come "he said ruffled her hair as he walked passes her
He sat behind the behind the desk and fiddled with the lock in it while she sat on the table watching him, he pulled out a lovely wooden box it was covered in leather and Rue could tell it was expensive wood work then he handed it to her she looked from the box to him the back again before taking it from him somehow the moment felt ominous to her, the box was heavy and when she opened it inside was a gun, it was a small gun silver sleek and elegant with beautiful inscriptions on it that she did not understand, she had never really understood the use of guns for her kind not when it had been used so ceremonially to hunt them and not when they could shift and do it all themselves anyway but in that moment she wanted to be the type of girl, no woman who would wield such a weapon it was beautiful.
"Why are you giving me this" she said turning the weapon over in her hands, it was perfectly balanced "Was it my mother's"
He put both hands on the side of her head and stared into her eyes
"If ever I'm not here you need to protect the pack you must promise me" he said
She stared back at him just as intently "Dad I'm twelve"
"I need you to promise me"
"No" she said stubbornly, starting to get irritated "You will always be there to protect and I can't fight anyone with this" she lifted the gun "And I am a child Father as you and everyone else love to remind me"
He sighed and shook his head as though trying to clear his thoughts
"I suppose you are right" he said
"I am" she replied extra haughty
"Alright now its late"
"Yes a man of your age is expected to be in bed by nine o clock yes?"
He stared at her and she giggled at her own hilarity, kissed her father good night and left.
That night would be imprinted in her mind for time to come as her clearest memory of her father, later she would begin to notice changes he seemed distant his mind else where half the time a furrow on his brows as though he were thinking about something intently but just as quickly dismissing said notion, he had no interest in living any longer and he hadn't for a long time but that was just how she had grown to know him.
One night she woke with an ominous feeling in her chest, she knew something was wrong no she knew someone was going to die, she grabbed the gun from her bed side table and ran out of her room she heard voices coming from her father's study but it was too late for meetings she crept slowly toward the door.
Her father, her hero, the man to her who seemed as an imposing a force as any lay on the floor his right eye swollen and blood coming out the side of his head.
"…with you huh, just tell us who"
The owner of the voice who spoke was Edge, her father's closest adviser and friend and held a gun to her father's head clearly this had been going on a while, but he didn't answer him, he just lay there his chest moving unsteadily
"Who is it Luke, I'm not gonna ask again" he asked she could see that there were three other men in the room and a woman thy just stood there seeming to enjoy themselves
"You said that already" Her father said even now his voice was calm, then his eyes shifted to the door where she crouched tears rolling down her face and hand in her mouth to keep her from screaming, there was no words passed through to her mind or pleads telling her to run for help or anything.
Where are the guards
He just lay there and stared at her.
"You don't have to die for them, man" Edge said almost pleadingly as he raised the gun to his head. Almost.
"Yeah" He said and kept looking at her as she cried she begged him with her eyes to do something to make her do something but her Alpha wouldn't let her go he held her there with his eyes, and once again she knew he loved her and then Edge pulled the trigger and her father was everywhere, then she screamed for still she could not look away even then rough hands grabbed and threw her on the floor her vision blurred and head spun, she tried to scream but could not seem catch her breath.
"Be quick" she heard Edge say over his shoulders as he and the woman walked away
"Hey little girl you wanna have some fun with us"
One of them chuckled and she would never forget their faces
In the years to come she would replay that night over and over as they did what they wanted to her body and think maybe should have run, or screamed or begged harder she didn't know either way, but she was just glad that her father's eyes were closed though it.