Staring at the ceiling with an unwavering passion, I find myself confined within the sterile walls of this hospital room for what feels like an eternity.
I refrain from counting the passing days, not out of forgetfulness, but rather an unwillingness to confront the relentless passage of time in my current state.
In a sudden surge of recollection, a line from a song resurfaces in my mind: "Tears started falling from my eyes."
A fit of coughing follows, accompanied by the taste of blood on my lips. My mind feels weaker than ever before, and in this moment, I understand that my journey is nearing its end.
Finally, an end to this pathetic and solitary existence. Yet, to my surprise, waves of regret, guilt, and despair wash over me. Emotions, both familiar and indescribable, intertwine, refusing to be put into words—now or ever.
A presence passes through me, its nature uncertain, whether my soul or spirit, I cannot discern. It...
In a feeble attempt to console myself, a desperate thought takes hold: IF only I could be granted a second chance. A chance to truly live, to savor the richness of life, and to feel truly alive. Someone to shed tears for, or someone who would shed tears for me...
But then reality intrudes, cruel and unyielding, while the heavens remain indifferent.
As a fervent fan of novels and comics, I find solace in this line on a spiritual level.
"Why this hobby?" you may ponder. It is a cherished escape from reality, allowing me to immerse myself in the shoes of a protagonist surrounded by friends (1), a lover, and a world filled with boundless exploration.
Ironically, in this moment, I recall the journeys of protagonists who shared a similar condition to mine, yet...
One ascended to become the progenitor of an entire race, while the other donned the mantle of a lord, mastering realms beyond imagination (2).
Oh, how awe-inspiring they were.
Please...
I yearn not for death. There are still countless experiences I have yet to embrace, such as witnessing the resolution of Denji's tale (3).
If only I could be granted a second chance, I would seize it wholeheartedly—a life devoid of regrets, blessed with a healthy body, and filled with thrilling adventures.
Author's note:
(1) - Who will be the harbinger of truth? That the bonds of friendship may not always be what they seem.
(2) - Can you venture a guess as to the identities of these remarkable protagonists?
(3) - THE BOYS theme meme