EVE
On our way back to the manor, Xenon turned the radio on. A song about first love entitled "Always You" by a local singer boomed inside the car and he adjusted the volume. He muttered an apology and I only responded with a shy smile. Then I remembered what he said about silence and I decided to grab the opportunity.
"I guess this breaks your mood for silence then?"
"maybe." – he responded. Fair enough. We rounded the corner just before the traffic light turned red. It was kind of cool.
I spared him a glance. His lips were sealed and I saw no intent to start a conversation. Thing was, I really wanted to talk right then. When we get married, at least I want to be bound to someone who I know the favorite color of. and hopefully more than that.
"can I ask you some things then, Xen?"
He shrugged… which I took as a yes. I got my phone out and went to my Notes app. He observed my every move with a confused expression.
"okay… favorite color?"
"I don't know why this is necessary."
"just answer. I'll be your…wife soon. I hope I know something about you." – I saw him flinch at the mention of the word "wife" but I shrug it off.
"black."
"thanks. Food?"
"pasta. Any sort."
"book?"
"The Great Gatsby"
"wow." – I stopped typing. I know he's smart but I didn't take him to be a classic literature type of guy. He noticed the sudden pause in the question and looked at me.
"what's wrong?"
"nothing… favorite fruit?"
"dragon fruit. Can you stop? This feels like some high school slumbook crap."
I mouthed an "okay" and kept my phone after saving the notes. At least I knew a thing or two about him today. That counts.
The rest of the trip was very silent. Well, except from the slow music coming from the radio, that is. We reached the manor to find the living room empty. Two women greeted us as they were cleaning couch and the small glass table. The empty glasses and saucers told me the conversation was already done and the three of them has gone their own ways.
Kevin the butler ordered two men to help us with our purchases. I asked mine to be brought to my room upstairs. Xenon headed straight to the kitchen while I decided to go find my parents.
I checked every guest room in the manor and it was in my fourth attempt that I found where they were staying. My dad was sleeping and mom was emptying their bags to the closet. The answer on how long they're going to stay here slowly reveals: too long. Or at least based on the number of clothes my mother brought with her.
"Eve! Oh, my darling child, come in." – Mom stood up and met me halfway for a hug. Her multiple bracelets dangled from her wrists and sounded like wind chimes.
"hello, mom."
I tried to recall the last time she and I had a talk in person. It was a long time ago. When I started the music school I devoted all my time in making it happen. I wasn't home for too long and only communicated with them through online chats and calls.
I had to admit, I missed it. I missed her.
"I'm so glad you're here, mom. It's kind of rough lately."
"what happened? sit down. tell me everything."
I did sit down and grabbed a pillow to snuggle with. She continued folding her clothes and Dad's. I wanted to mention the significant difference between how many my dad brought and hers but decided not to. It's kind of common between them.
"well, what do you think of this? Is it true you and dad already discussed this marriage with the Alisters long time ago?"
She chuckled. I don't think what I asked was funny.
"I had nothing to do with it, sweetie. Your father and his best friend talked about it all the time. I thought it was only a joke but… here we are. I also don't see anything wrong about it. Your father and I were also arranged by our parents and it turned out to be good. Also, if you're worrying about the preparations, don't be. We already planned everything so you and Xenon have nothing to worry about. All you have to do in the wedding is to show up."
I sighed. I thought to talk to her would be comforting. I felt worse.
"mom, I… don't you think it's strange? I know I consented to this but… I don't know. I feel like this is a mistake somehow?"
"it's okay, sweetie. Also, I… I found something from your room while I was packing." – she said, grinning
She told me to wait while she rummaged on the third bag she brought. I watched her with curious eyes. What did I leave at home? As what I said the last time I was there was during college, senior year. All of those stuff may only either be a business book or that stupid journal I write everything on.
THAT STUPID JOURNAL I WRITE EVERYTHING ON.
My eyes dilated when the realization dawned. When she showed me the exact same thing, I jumped out of the bed and grabbed it from her grasp. No way. No, no, no, no. I hugged the journal in my chest and sat back down.
"mom… tell me you didn't read this."
My mother looked away and shrugged. OH. MY. GOD.
I know I'm being overdramatic here but there was only one subject in that journal: Xenon Jaye Alister. All of my college admiration on him, the unsent letters, the gifts I was planning to give him as to confess my love, made up love stories and everything embarrassing was written on that journal. I hated myself all of a sudden for forgetting about that journal. And the fact that I left it at home for my mother to read.
"so… you knew everything, don't you? oh no, mom, did you tell Dad? Is that why I am marrying Xenon now?"
I knew I was blushing the whole time I said that.
"no, I didn't utter a word to your father."
I exhaled. As if that was a relief. Still, someone else has read all of my college pinings over a guy and that is icky by itself.
"just forget this please. this is nothing."
I stood up and made my way to the door. Mom didn't let me and grabbed my arm when I passed her side.
"you love this man, and I get that. That's why I didn't object to this wedding."
"mom, he doesn't love me. in fact he-s"
"yet. he doesn't love you yet. but that is subject to change. Anyone is very lucky to love you, my Eve. You're a find. A very rare find."
My mother cupped my face while saying those sweet words. I smiled and gave her another hug. For a while, I felt comforted.
Deep down, I know I wanted to believe in what she said. I hope he will, mom, someday.