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"Do you like me?"
My thoughts stopped when he suddenly asked me out of the blue. He is not looking at me yet. I know he is serious about the question he threw at me. Immediately, I gazed at the sea, where I could see the sunset. I let out a sigh. I don't know if I'll admit it or not. Because I'm scared. I am afraid that if I admitted the truth, he would reject me.
I don't think I can afford a rejection from him.
Yes, I waited for the day when I would see him again to confess my feelings for him, even if there was no return.
But why am I so wrapped up in fear?
'Yes, or No', that's all I have to say, but it's hard to pronounce that word, especially when you don't know which of the two choices would be your answer.
Tell him the truth, Elisha. There's no use if you lie because it's obvious.
Alright. I'm no longer your student and you're not my teacher anymore.
I guess this is the right time for him to know about my feelings.
"I don't like you," I answered. I didn't look at him when I said that, but through the corner of my eyes, I could see that he was looking at me.
I just don't know what his reaction was.
I feel my whole body trembling. But I already said it. I am going to confess to him right now and this is final.
"Because I love you. I love you, Nathan." I added. I turned my gaze to him. I could see the shock on his face.
Is that surprising? I thought it was obvious to him.
"Elisha..."
"Isha." I cut his sentence. "That's what you called me, Nathan." I corrected him.
"Isha, you can't love me." He seriously said, but there was a trace of worry on his face.
"Why? Is it because I was your student and you were my teacher back then? Or maybe it's because of our 17-year gap? Nathan, age doesn't matter. I don't mind. Besides, I am no longer your student. I am an adult now..."
"It's not like that." He cut my line.
"Then what? Why can't I love you?" I asked in bewilderment. I was so desperate to know the reason why I shouldn't love him.
He took a deep breath. His eyes seemed to speak a lot, but I couldn't read them.
"Is it because you don't love me?"
"Isha, look..."
"So, you don't love me?" I raised my eyebrows.
"It's not like that, Ish." His voice was slightly raised but his tone was still calm.
My eyes lit up at what he said. So, that means... He loves me too?
"You love me." Not a question, but a statement. I came closer to him slowly and I could see his full face in the sunset light. I cupped his face while the two of us kept our eyes on each other. "Please tell me you love me. I want to hear it from you." I almost whispered to him as I brushed his cheeks gently.
He raised his right hand to his cheek and he took my hand that touched his cheek. "Ish." He whined. He caressed and slowly removed it. "My love for you is not enough for you to love me too. Loving me can hurt you. I don't want that to happen." He released my hand. I couldn't understand him.
Why would it hurt my feelings to love him?
But I ignored it. I don't care. Whatever his reasons for blocking my love for him, he can never stop me from loving him.
"I don't care. Even if loving you can kill me, I don't care. I'm willing to take the risks. It's too late for you to stop me from loving you because I'm already committed. I love you, Nathan. And I know you love me too."
"Ish..."
"Do you love me?"
"Ish..."
"Answer me, Nathan." I cut his line. "Do you love me?"
He was silent and just staring into my eyes. "I love you." He said after being silent for a few seconds. "I love you, Elisha."
And before I could respond, Nathan quickly pulled my wrist closer to him, his left hand grabbed my neck and kissed me with a full of emotional excitement. His mouth covered my entire lips and he inserted his tongue into my mouth. He bit my tongue and then kissed me aggressively. Without breaking the kiss, Nathan carried me. I wrapped my two legs around his hip. I could feel him walking. I do not know where we are going. But I don't care.
Until I heard the door open, we entered and closed it. We're in a room, I think. But again, I don't care.
"Uhmm." I gasped as he started kissing my neck when he put me down on the wooden bed.
He went on top of me. I could feel the weight of his body, and his arms around me. He is kissing me passionately and I love it. I love the way he kisses me. It's full of love, emotions, and excitement. He doesn't fail to make me happy about what he does.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. We kissed again, slowly but full of emotions for so long, then he pulled himself away from me. I chased his lips as he pulled himself away.
He smiled at me.
He shoved my hair into my ears. He brushes my cheek with his hand down to my chin. I could see the admiration in his eyes when he looked at me. "You're beautiful." He whispered and he kissed my forehead. I was happy to hear that word from him. It's been a while since he told me so.
Every time he told me that I'm beautiful I couldn't help but smile.
He lowered his head to kiss me again. He went on top of me again. He stood above me as the two of us kissed intensely. I moaned as he put his tongue inside my mouth and sucked my tongue, going back to my lips and kissing it again. Nathan and I were just in that situation until we felt tired of kissing.
I'm going crazy. I want to feel him right now, but we shouldn't do it here. I bit my lower lip as he cut off our kiss.
"Come on. Brent might be looking for us." he touched the lower of my lip and smiled.
Oh right. My mind almost forgot him.
"Yup. We should go." I laughed a little.
We both got up, fixed ourselves, and went out of the room.
When we exited the room, I was surprised to find out it was a guardhouse. Jeez!
Luckily, it was empty.
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