Dante's ever growing genius did not account for the fact that the Marines would declare a state of emergency shortly after his maiming of Akainu. The second he exited the mess hall he was met with blaring alarms and dim hallways bathed in red.
Entirely ignorant of what was currently happening, Dante simply continued about his walk uncaring of the medical team slowly shifting against the wall, almost trying to avoid his sight like he were some type of dinosaur with how slow they went.
The assumption he had was that they had been sent to see Akainu's condition, but how they knew he was in a battered state Dante knew not. He wasn't a sage, after all.
Some moments later though the alarm stopped entirely, with the atmosphere returning to how it had been before. Dante believed it to be because the Marines didn't want to put the Shichibukai on edge with it, or maybe they were trying to distract him.
A few moments later, Dante found the crux of the plans the Marines had to try and subdue him. Lull him into a false sense of security and simply dogpile him while attaching some handcuffs to him. That was their plan. Some simple handcuffs.
How was he aware of such plans? Well, from his current position he could see several men piling atop his Doppelganger while desperately fumbling to place the handcuffs on him, cheering in relief upon their 'success'.
"You missed."
Shock, horror, and a slight amount of confusion echoed in the hall, as Marines snapped their heads in Dante's direction, unwilling to believe the horrible reality before them, that they had failed so miserably. The Doppelganger faded out of existence and affirmed their greatest fears.
"Man, you guys are seriously bad at your jobs."
They chose the wrong man to attack, and would soon pay the price. Unfortunately for them, Dante had a meeting to attend, and gave no pity to lollygaggers, scallywags, or ruffians.
────────────────────
A few moments later Dante exited the hall, having treated himself to a cup of coffee along the way and made himself at home within Marineford, finally getting his hands on those refreshments he wanted to try.
It almost took his mind off the depressing fact that he had still not gotten his hands on a boat to call his own on these lonely oceans.
Anyways, Dante now sat perched in a tower, shoulder leaning on the window as he watched the Shichibukai pass through the port and into the main base. Call him silly, but he could have sworn he only counted 5, despite one of the most important factors of maintaining balance being the existence of 7.
He paid no more mind to it, though, instead choosing to go wander down the halls once more. With the meeting soon encroaching, Dante saw it fit to return to his seat in the conference room, though upon opening the door was met with extreme hostility.
"Dante. I should have known your claims for diplomacy were moot. You're an animal, that much is for sure."
"We don't take kindly to liars 'round here."
"Please, for your own safety, surrender now."
Pausing for a moment in shock, only to realise that it was not a joke and the Marine high command were all holding weapons at the ready, mostly in the form of fists with Haki coating them, Dante decided to ease tension.
"Guys, whats this all about? Here I thought we were finally seeing eye to eye, now you go and pull this? I'm ashamed. Truly. How could you."
"You have the nerve to come into my own base, my fortress upon the water, and assault my men? Then act like theres no issue!? You're either one confident bastard or simply that stupid."
Pushing forward past the pointed sword of Tsuru, Dante gave little care towards Sengoku's barbs, instead choosing to make himself comfy, patting down his coat and resting his hands behind his back.
"I'll admit, I may have given the poor guy a couple boo-boos, but he attacked me first. I did everything in self defence."
"You are a wanted criminal. Your crimes more heinous than any Sinner in the past. The World Government would pay any sum to see you dead. He was perfectly within his right to attack you, something I should have done before I considered diplomacy myself."
Upon noticing that Garp and Sengoku planned to attack him any second now given the constant twitching in their muscles, Dante sighed and drew Ebony and Ivory, quick as lightning, and pointed each pistol at the elderly men.
"You really don't wanna go down this path, pal. It won't end well for you, trust me."
Tensions continued to brew as the standoff reached no end. The Marines had reached a boiling point with Dante, and realised that it had been a mistake to give him any leeway full stop. A stupid one sure, but anyone would be charmed by Dante's unnatural charisma.
Annoyed that the Marines had still not chosen to stand down, and perhaps feeling too many bad memories sprout up at having a katana pointed at him, Dante Tricked across the room and placed Ebony squarely against the back of Tsuru's skull, as he believed that she was the weak link and would cause enough distress with her being in danger for the two fisticuff merchants to stand down.
It worked. Like a charm, in fact, as grimaces appeared in their faces and fists were slowly lowered in defeat.
"I'm glad we could come to an agreement, gentlemen. Now, I believe we have some guests to entertain."
Upon speaking in the most cordial manner he could manage, Dante promptly put away Ebony and Ivory, placing them comfortably against his back in their pristine leather holsters, slowly walking around the table until returning to his still warm seat.
'That one was close. I ain't trying to kill Garp and ruin my only good relationships in this world. Straw Hats would want me dead.' He mentally breathed a sigh of relief. He wouldn't hesitate to shoot everyone in the room if it came down to it, but he would rather not if given the choice.
The door opened, ever so slowly, and in walked the Shichibukai, a group who would be successful in disappointing Dante beyond what he thought capable.
────────────────────
And immediately upon seeing the first man, Dante began positively howling with laughter. How could he not, when Doflamingo walked in with the exaggerated swagger of a nefarious pirate? The man had a gait to him that left meters between each step, something that astonished Dante.
A mass of invisible, razor sharp strings were sent silently towards Dante's throat, eager to tear his flesh apart - only to be stonewalled by an array of Summoned Swords that instantly shredded them into pieces, leaving only a frustrated Doflamingo and Dante, with his shit eating grin plastered on.
"I ask that no attacks be made against another in these grounds. This meeting was not made for malicious purposes."
Tsuru, having recovered from what can only be described as a near death experience opened the discussion with a single rule, as the rest of the Shichibukai stepped in.
...
"I was promised 7 of these guys. Why's there only 5?"
"You were promised nothing, Dante. Hold your tongue, or I will gladly tear it out of your throat, myself." Sengoku held no vitriol back.
As of now Dante was feeling extremely let down. The individuals before him were for all intents and purposes, much more disappointing than he initially expected.
A fat ass man - with no teeth to boot - a weird fish creature that stunk out the room, the plug walk maestro Doflamingo himself, a giant ass man with cat paws and a Bible, and a rather short man with some astonishingly well kept facial hair and sharp eyes, pointed in no discernable direction other than empty space.
"With this meeting, we would like to officially welcome Teach D. Marshall into the ranks of the Shichibukai, and ask that you all find peace with this decision. He was awarded the position for merit in capturing a wanted criminal of exceeding importance."
Sengoku was a decent diplomat, of that Dante could agree on. He also noticed it was another guy with the D. in his name, something he couldn't quite think any further on given his childish nature losing interest in it a mere few seconds after extended thought.
"You will find no complaints from me, Fleet Admiral. I have only come here to ensure the continued safety of my homeland." The next to speak was the fishman, and Dante could not lie to himself, the creature had a damn fine voice, and a Mister Miyagi aesthetic too. He could see himself getting along with him.
Common affirmations of 'sure, go ahead' were half heartedly spoken for the next few seconds as the remaining Shichibukai decided they wanted nothing to do with Teach based solely off appearance.
Raising his hand in the air, so as to not seem rude yet still shouting out in the middle of the action, Dante made himself known and took control of the meeting.
"Yeah, hey, can we hurry this up please? Yadda yadda, he's a Shichibukai. I doubt it matters much, no offence but you guys seem pretty incompetent if you can't even attend a meeting properly. Aint even a full roster."
Mihawk, who had been sat down arms folded and with eyes closed firmly, cracked open his eye an inch, gazing upon Dante's boots laying on the table before addressing the man.
"Red Devil Dante. I did not expect you would be making our acquaintance. You carry much confidence for a man whose only officially recognised feat is slaying a man incapable of defending himself."
Laughing out at the entirely unexpected barb from Mihawk, Dante took a moment to compose himself before responding.
"Oh, man, didn't expect that one. Anyways, I ain't here to compare sizes with you all on how strong I am, I just wanna get myself a boat and keep tabs on my brother."
Dante looked at Sengoku for approval to continue, to which gave a single hesitant nod, hopeful that after this meeting was done be would never see Dante again and be rid of the burden that he brought whenever he spoke.
"Allow me to establish something. A sort of... ground rule, let's call it. If you see a man in blue, with hair slicked back who looks exactly like me, then call me. I'll even leave you my Mushi, just so you can always make sure. Id say its for a mix of my own goal, and your own safety, so if you want to test Vergil then you can try take him on yourself."
Looking around and seeing the disinterested eyes of all those around him, and the positively haunting emptiness of Kuma's, Dante very quickly realised that none of them gave a single shit about his request.
Sitting back down, and muttering to himself something along the lines of 'your funeral', he went along with the rest of the meeting and simply enjoyed himself the coffee he made before, which had now turned cold.
────────────────────
After a half hour of simple notices, announcements; being the arrest of a Division Captain of the Whitebeard Pirates, and a bake sale in Human Resources, the meeting finally came to a close.
Dante, exhausted beyond all repair and questioning mentally why he even bothered with this meeting began to slowly walk out of the room, uncaring for the multiple sighs of relief Sengoku breathed.
Just as he was about to exit the island of Marineford from the docks using what was most definitely a stolen boat, he found himself faced with a choice.
He could either approach Teach, and question how exactly the man took down Fire Fist Ace despite his, pardon his French, 'fat ass stature' or he could approach Doflamingo, and ask about the sorry state of the Shichibukai, maybe get payback for the string volley from earlier. Hell, he could even ask about that goofy ass walk the man has.
Decisions, decisions. Dante was almost overwhelmed with choice.