The one they called upon…. The boy named Calder…. He was my younger brother. He was around 6 at the time. He had tears streaming down his face. Our Father was chosen as a gladiator as well and if our mother chose to take his place there would be no way to take care of any of her children…. We'd probably die off. I still remember his shaky voice… "I... I am Calder".
I had to do something. I couldn't let them take my brother. "WAIT! I WILL GO IN HIS STEAD."
The brown robe was intrigued. "Oh….. so we have a volunteer. We haven't had one of those in a long long….. long time….. So be it. Come with us and we'll take you to your new home."
I turned once more….. It would be one of the last times I saw my village…. And my family. I tried to keep it together….. but my mother was honestly my everything. My entire world. I broke down when I saw her crying. The pain in her voice was etched into my heart. I needed to make them pay. They acted as if we had a somewhat necessary and equal relationship. Little did we know…. We were being used and farmed. We brought in so much more as gladiators….. did our village even see a fraction of what we made sacrificing our lives…. Not only our bodies but also our minds were slowly eroded... and we were fed scraps… we were told to shut up and be happy with what we got…. We were told to see it as a blessing and be thankful….. FUCK THAT!
My brother cried as well….. Tears dripped down my cheeks as I tried my best to never forget their faces.
"BROLY! ONCE YOU GO TO THE PITS! FIND YOUR FATHER! FIND !@#$%^^&*. I LOVE YOU….. WE LOVE YOU!!!"
I was choking up. My feelings and emotions were about to burst out from my body but I had to keep a strong face. I can't let them worry more. "I love you both…. WAIT…. THE NAME MOTHER…. WHAT DID YOU SAY!"
The cheering of the crown drowned out the name she tried to tell me…. The name that could save me from so much hardship. The crowd and village cheered with all their might. They lost two of their own but the rest were saved… Their families were fine for another year. They slowly grew accustomed and didn't mind giving up their neighbours for their own salvation. Cockroaches….. that's how I saw many of them. They were worthless in my eyes…. Worth less than the dirt under my feet. I was dragged off and a bag was placed over my head….
The next thing I knew I was thrown onto the cold, wet and muddy ground. My back ached when it felt the impact of the ground beneath me. My head cover was removed and my arms and legs tied. I couldn't move much. I wiggled like a worm on the ground and cursed. "Where the fuck am I…." I was surprisingly calm. Death never scared me. I wasn't like many others…. Life had it's good moments and it was nice and all….. but I wouldn't mind dying all that much. The only one I wouldn't want to hurt is my mother.
I've always said. If I could push a button and just disappear…. But no one else was affected at all by me not being around…. Then yes, I'd press that button. It wasn't a surprise… I never wanted to live a long life.