I'm so broken right now.
Untold tales were absorbed into my pillow.
Why do these ideas keep popping into my head?
Giving me a sense of
Better if I hadn't existed at all.
How is everyone so cheerful,
Or are you too skilled at acting the part?
I work nonstop to change who I am.
Am I at blame in this situation?
Or is it something I'm not yet able to see?
Throughout my life
Many people claim that I have a mental health issue.
The dilemma of whether to believe them threatens to undo what I have accomplished.
It's growing difficult for me to believe that anything will change.
My hope begins to fade as
I have the impression that there is nowhere for me to land as I descend.
Is it possible to alter anything about me?
Both physically and mentally,
Can I live up to what people expect of me?
Is it me who needs to apologize, or was someone from my past responsible for the person I am today?
Will I ever be found dead by someone I care about?
Would they genuinely miss me, or would they be relieved that a weight off their shoulders has finally been lifted?
Do I despise myself the most or is it someone else that caused me to commit suicide?
Why are there so many questions?
Why do I feel so used?
Where did the happy little child go?
She was either slain by everyone else or I kept her from myself.
I used to be joyful, but right now I feel like I'm drowning in the night with nowhere to go.