Chereads / Fallen Leaves Year 1 / Chapter 4 - I Want

Chapter 4 - I Want

Jay couldn't believe it. He was finally admitting to himself who he was. He was finally telling his truth.

"Hey," Alex, one of the guys sitting in the scene, whispered at Jay. "Psst."

"Yeah?"

"Learn your lines, gay guy," Alex whispered in his ear.

"Wha, what do you mean exactly? You, uh, you think I'm gay?"

"Oh, come on, everybody knows," Alex replied loud enough for the rest of the cast to hear him. "Every theater department in the country has one, but you seem to be breaking all the stereotypes. I thought gays were supposed to be great at theater."

"Meaning what exactly?"

"You'll never get a grasp on this script. This part is just too big for you. Perhaps you could take a lineless role."

"All right, everyone, breaks over," Mrs. Hearn called out. "Let's get back on stage. Jay, just take a deep breath and read from the script. I don't want anyone to give him grief. We still have plenty of time."

"Yeah, right, gay boy," Alex said under his breath. "Tick, tock, tick, tock. Time's almost up."

"Would you shut up?" Jay screamed at Alex.

"Jay!" Mrs. Hearn scolded. "That is quite enough. You should know better than to talk down to any fellow cast member."

"But he-"

"No buts. Now apologize to him."

"I am not going to apologize to him."

"It's ok, Mrs. Hearn. I took no offense," Alex said.

"Still, Jay if you want to get far in this world, you'll have to learn to apologize."

"Do you have to say this in front of the entire cast? I mean, this isn't like an after school special or anything."

The whole auditorium fell silent.

"Fine, we'll call it a day."

Jay felt guilty now. The entire rehearsal was cut short by an hour because of his big, fat mouth. Maybe he should apologize. There was no way he could be at peace with this cast if there was this much tension with Alex.

"Alex," Jay said, "I'm sorry I blew up at you."

"Not to worry, queer. Your words can't hurt me," he said winking at him as he left the auditorium.

Jay's pant pocket buzzed. He pulled out his cell phone to see that Kerass had responded: It took you long enough.

You knew? Jay texted back as he walked out of the auditorium.

Yeah, I've known for years by now, Kerass instantly responded.

Why didn't you just ask me? Jay asked after he got outside. His dad would pick him up in an hour. He would be fine to wait until then.

The three dots popped up. He waited for Kerass's response, suffering internally, but then the dots disappeared. A couple of seconds later, the dots reappeared. But then something strange occurred. Kerass was calling him. Jay picked up.

"I wanted you to hear my voice and not just my words when I say this," Kerass began. "I wanted to wait until you were comfortable enough to tell me yourself. It doesn't matter if I knew or not. What matters is that you're finally comfortable enough to talk about it."

"You have no idea how much better that makes me feel," Jay replied, his eyes glistening.

"It's not a big deal, buddy, but I'm so glad you told me. Listen, I gotta go, but I wanted to make sure you were ok before I head off."

"Yeah, I'm fine, now that my best friend knows the truth, I think I could take on any negativity now."

"Don't get over zealous on me. All right, Jay, I'll see you at school, buddy."

"Yeah, see you then."

"Ok, then, bye," Kerass said quickly and then the call was over.

Yep, there was no doubt in his mind now. There was no one else he would rather kiss than Kerass Coscarelli. I want him, he said to himself.

The bus doors opened. The school day hadn't begun and Cadence still had unfinished geometry homework to do before the first bell, but she only had one thing on her mind. She walked on and saw Kerass sitting in the back of the bus again. She walked over to him sitting in the seat in front of his.

"Hey, Kerass," she said.

"Uh, do I, do I know you?" he asked.

She closed her eyes irritated. It was so disappointing. How could he pretend like they hadn't connected? The whole point of the peer support group was supposed to, you know, support each other?

"Fine," she said getting up and moving to the front of the bus.