Narrator: ~Purgatory, the front gate of heaven where the unwelcomed stays for briefing might they carry some unnecessary belongings like firearms, drugs, and shit that is illegal.
Those people who carries unnecessary belongings that are allegedly "good people" are screened to check their legitimacy.
Alas, the good lord of all the universe gave them a leeway to enter the golden paradise of wholesome people and hopefully zero fanatics of faith.
Our protagonist Gee, a middle age man born from a well off family, grew old and became a parasite to his family.
He loves playing games and beating off his meat in front of his PC while watching 2D characters getting drilled by a humongous Ogre with a BBC, xray, nt....(omitted)
You might be thinking, "Oh he is so rich but wasted it, it must be unreal, he should atleast be a business man or partying." But you're wrong. You see when he was young, he was a lovely lad, his parents love him so much they said out of all his siblings he was the only easy birth, without pain at all. However, at the age of 18, his parents finally got the guts to tell him he was adopted. And ever since, he was not the same.
He became rebellious, lazy and obese. And one day, a butter soaked steak that he ate was the final piece of the puzzle on his artery to complete is heart failure. He died when he got an erection, the blood that got downwards was not able to return to his heart and dies.
St. Petre the Gate Keeper: And as stated inside the book of life. You are not allowed to enter the paradise. But be glad, for our lord and savior Jebus gave you an opportunity to escape your impending doom in hell and gave you the purgatory pass. Rejoice Gee for you are forgiven slightly but still not forgotten, now go forth to the AfterLiner and fulfill the task bestowed upon thee.
Narrator: ~Gee, still dumbfounded, walks towards the direction St. Petre pointed. A bony white train can be seen its purity shamed the people who have the purgatory pass.
Random Angel: Hey, what are you doing? You are not allowed to enter the AfterLiner. Stop!
Random Dead Person: *screams in pain* Argh! Help me let me in please. No don't. It's melting, I'm cumming. *screams with added pleasure*
All Other Dead People:*visible confusion*
Narrator: ~A dead person screams in agony as he was not permitted to enter both heaven and purgatory. He tried to ran away to the AfterLiner but a pitch black hole appeared bellow him. Screaming souls, burning like lava cling unto the dead person's legs giving him the burning pain while an evil hand went on him and wrap its hand and jerks his....(omitted) That's why he was in a pleasure-pain phase and made everyone dumbfounded by the event.
Gee looked at it and fear creeps inside him. His blank looked, now turned pale white at the current sight.
Gee: (I must not let myself be jerk off by a flaming hand.)