"Lirael? What's the matter?" Lance rushes to my side as I can't take in a deep enough breath.
I'm trying to breathe but I can't take in a deep enough breath. I'm feeling dizzy, looking around the room for some where to hide, shaking from what the email tells me.
"Lirael!" Lance tries to get my attention, but he sounds like I'm underwater, "Focus on me, okay? Take a deep breath in through your nose, and out through your mouth."
I hear him, but the words are not making much sense.
I need to hide.
I have got to get away.
Where?
I can't even see straight, the room keeps spinning.
Suddenly, I'm staring into deep teal blue eyes, eyes that are determined, that are safe. My face is cradled in between two gentle, but firm palms, keeping my attention forward.
I need to breathe.
"Breathe, that's right, in through the nose, out through the mouth. That's right, Lirael. Breathe." Lance continues talking to me, doing his best to soothe me.
"I think I'm going to be sick." My stomach turns violently from my head still wanting to spin. A sudden lurch, like a kick to my diaphragm has me gagging and projectile vomiting part of lunch up.
Lance does an epic catch with the hotel garbage bin, as he puts it under my chin as I gag and lose the rest of my lunch. He helps me hold the bin up, helping me to the bathroom, and holds my hair back while I empty my stomach and just dry retch into the toilet.
Once my stomach starts to calm down, Lance leaves my side and comes back with a glass of water. I sip it, watching as he wets a wash cloth and comes back to me, kneeling to wipe off my face. Care and concern are in his touch, the look on his face, but he doesn't say a word as my heart calms from its erratic pace.
I try to get up, but my legs feel weak and unsteady. I grit my teeth and swallow my pride as I put my hand out to ask, "Lance can you help me stand up? Please?"
My voice is as shaky as my legs.
Lance swoops down and lifts me up in his arms, and carries me to the bed. He sets me down and covers me up, before picking my phone up off the floor.
"May I?" He asks gesturing to my phone.
Clenching my eyes shut, not even wanting to look at it again, just in case not looking will make it not true, I nod grimly.
"1133." I mutter the passcode to the screen, as I feel the weight of the bed next to me go down. I feel the tension radiating off of Lance as the silence continues.
I hear him set my phone down, before feeling his eyes on me.
"Lirael, just because he's missed his last two check ins with his parole officer doesn't mean anything. What makes you think he could find you anyways? I thought you changed your name before you moved anyways?" Lance tries to reassure me, rubbing my arm.
I grimace, but agree with what he has said so far, "That's true, but I had to put a notice in the paper, once a week for four weeks, before it was changed. What if he figured it out because he found one of those papers? What if one of his friends saw the notice and told him?" I grip the edge of the bed sheet, my anxious thoughts making me start to panic again.
Lance takes my hands, trying to gently have me release the sheet and loosen my hands, "The chances of that would be slim though right? He's probably doing something stupid and illegal. He is probably avoiding his parole officer because he knows he's just going to go back to jail."
I shake my head, pulling my hands from his grasp to wring them as I inform him, "You're not giving him enough credit. He's smarter than you think. If he was doing something illegal, he'd still check in, because he would know that the best time to get away with something, is normally when you're right in front of the laws face. He used to do drug deals on the same street, in sight of where the police station was. He's missing and there's only a handful of reasons why. Him coming for me is one of them. His parole officer sending me this email is a big indicator that they think I should be concerned."
"Okay." Lance sighs, rubbing his face, "I'll contact Brian, let him know. We can let him get a security system installed at your place too. I'll have him make sure it's nothing too obvious either, like what I have at the club for the entryways and parking lot. Do you want me to inform Uncle Jim about it, or should I leave that to you, since he's your boss?" He reaches for his own phone, handing me mine in offering.
I take it and check the time back home before I make the call. Lance is on already on the phone talking to Brian in the bathroom when Jim picks up.
-"Hello? Lirael, hey I'm with Beth right now, but how's Tahiti?"
I sigh, "Tell Beth, mom, hello and Tahiti is amazing. But Jim, I'm calling you as an employee right now. I need to inform you of something so you're aware of the situation."
After the phone call and Jim's assurance that he'll alert security and other staff members to be aware, I email the parole officer asking for an updated photo for my work to have. I close my phone and rub my eyes, wishing that I was just having a nightmare at the moment.
Lance comes out of the bathroom still talking, "... she's calmer than earlier, right now. You want me to ask her?"
I turn to Lance and he holds his phone out towards me, "Brian just wants to speak for a moment, if you're up for it?"
I silently take the phone and offer up a shaky greeting, "Hey."
"Hey, Lance and I, we're going to help take care of security with your home and if you want we could hire someone like Big daddy to watch your place for you."
I groan in awkward gratefulness and guilt, "No... that's too much. You guys are already adding a security system." I say chewing on my lip.
"Hey, we want to make sure you are safe from that asshole and we want you to know you are safe and feel safe." He stresses his last words to me, and even though he can't see it, I flash a soft smile.
"Thank you, Brian. I appreciate it. I'm going to give you back to Lance now. I'm going to try and eat something so I don't get nauseous again." I hand the phone back over to Lance who offers me the leftover food from our brunch.
I eat the toast and fruit that was left and feel a bit better after brushing my teeth. Lance hangs up the phone as I join him on the bed, feeling awkward in the silence that follows, as I fiddle with the hem of my dress.