We both wanted to go snorkeling the next day, so we went to the the front desk to set something up with their snorkel guides and instructors. After that was set up, we went to the restaurant for dinner, ordered dessert to go back to the room with and opted for a movie in bed to end the day.
Cuddling up on his chest, my whole being was a just a warm and fuzzy, bubbly, cheek straining smile, feeling absolutely content. I did not even realize I'd been smiling for so long, until I went to laugh at a scene, and simply spreading my mouth open to laugh caused my jaw to twitch unexpectedly.
Furrowing my brow, I stretch my jaw out to release some of the tension in my jaw. The tinge of pain caught my attention as well as Lance's.
"What was that look for?" His confusion showing lightly under his amusement.
"My cheeks hurt." I massage one of my cheeks where the muscles were aching from all the smiling.
"I can fix that." Lance begins to massage the muscles in my neck and cheek, easing the tension in them. My eyes roll back as his strong hands work magic on me.
"Oh.. man.." I moan lightly as his hands move to massage my temples and scalp, "why are you so good to me?" I groaned as he worked muscles that I didn't even know wanted a massage.
"Because I love you."
My eyes snap open, looking at his face, but he's just focused on massaging my head. I shut my eyes again, letting his words roll over and over again in my mind.
'Because I love you.'
He loves me...? I don't know how he wanted me to interpret that. The last time those words slipped out, we had a fight. Considering the fact that we just had another fight not long ago... I don't know if I should ask him to clarify or not. I don't want to fight with him again, not when we have been enjoying ourselves. He probably just meant it casually, right?
His hands disappear from my head, only for his lips to kiss my forehead. "There is that better?"
I nod in response, feeling the heat in my cheeks as I lean back on him in his open arms. We readjust ourselves and get comfortable to finish watching the movie. My mind is elsewhere though, contemplating our relationship so far.
He is stroking his fingers through my hair, his chest moving gently as he breathes. I can hear his heartbeat and the rumble of his chuckles when something funny happens on screen.
He's been very good to me, since before we were even together. He's been a great friend, the sex is fantastic, we have our hiccups, but we knew those would happen. Even when we have our misunderstandings and disagreements, we calm down and work it out, eventually. He's nothing like my ex, I know that.
So why am I still so hesitant about our relationship? Am I just not in love with him?
No, I don't think it's that. I am falling in love with him. Maybe, that is why I am so hesitant?
I do feel guilty about his mom, he still doesn't know that the treatments didn't work on her cancer. Maybe we should call her tomorrow morning before we go snorkeling?
"Hey, are you falling asleep?"
Lance's voice rumbles in his chest.
Nuzzling my nose against his firm chest, breathing in his unique masculine scent that hinted of the coconut bodywash he used earlier, "No, I was just thinking about calling mom tomorrow morning before we go snorkeling. We haven't called her since we arrived. She's probably sick of your uncle by now." I glance up at his face with a smirk.
Lance returns it with a smile and roll of the eyes, "Yeah, you're probably right. We'll call her in the morning, no big deal." He presses his soft lips against my forehead, before I lay my head back on his chest.
The movie ends shortly after and I sit up to stretch my arms out.
"Whoa!" I shout, as arms rush around my waist and I am pulled into Lance's lap.
Lance nuzzles my neck, his breath tickling my skin, making me giggle.
"I could listen to that giggle all day, every day, and never get tired of it." Lance breathes across my skin, sweeping my hair back from my neck to place his soft lips on my skin, leaving a trail of feathery kisses.
My heart flutters with joy at his words, enjoying the soft, playful kisses that he brings to my lips. His lips softly caress my own, our smiles beaming, seen even behind closed eyes.
The warmth of his palm caresses my cheek making my eyes flutter open to gaze deeply into his beautiful eyes.
I've never felt as content and this carefree. I can just be myself, I've never felt like I feel while I am with him. Even with our hiccups, he always finds a way to make it right between us as soon as he can.
How did I not notice how amazing he is before? How much effort he has put into making sure I feel secure with him? I'm an idiot for being hesitant with him. I could have thrown this all away sooner if he had not kept trying to make things alright between us.
That thought alone makes my heart ache with loss.
I do not want to think of life without him near me now.
I really do love him.
"What are you thinking about that has you looking at me like that?" Lance inquires with a curious twinkle in his eye but a bright smile catches one corner of his mouth to rise higher than the other.
"Like what?" I ask demurely, feigning ignorance.
Lance chuckles, "Like you are right now."
I lean forward, place my lips on his, and kiss him soft and slowly.
"I know...," I smile, still kissing him slowly in between, "not what you mean..."
He grips my hip, firmly, running his other hand up to the back of my neck to hold me in place as his parted lips open farther on my own. I feel his warm breath as he devours my lips. Immediately, he morphs my sweet kisses into a carnal caress.
Our mouth's part, leaving just enough space to breathe each others need in, my eyelids heavy as I focus on those swollen lips and the titillating arousal building inside of me.
His eyes look vulnerable as he stares at me with a heated gaze. His arousal and need for me so strong and apparent that his desire was starting to cause him pain.
Running a hand through his silky tresses, I admire the way he looks at me right now. This vivid and undeniable desire he has for me is making more than just the spot between my legs melt for him.
"Lirael, I need you." Lance whispers breathless, his voice aching with desire and a longing that's more than just lust.
My heart twinges with an ache of longing, mirroring that same painful yearning, and I think I know what I need to say right now.
"I love you, Lance." I say softly against his lips, staring deep into his eyes, "I really do."
I kiss him, feeling the tension in his body as my words click into place.
He pulls back from my lips, surprise etched into his wide eyes, like he must have heard me wrong.
I am unable to reign my shy but wide smile as I dip my head down into my shoulders, feeling the heat spread across my face.
For all my confidence as a Dom, I sure do lack it when it comes to expressing non sexual emotions. He's not saying anything though...
Did I just ruin the moment?
Shit...