It happened far quicker than I expected. No sooner than I had closed my eyes did I feel my mind wrenched from my body. It was an odd feeling, more uncomfortable than painful. A body formed around me naked and the world began to form into view. It was completely white. No walls or edges, even the floor I stood on, completely white without shadows. I couldn't help but heave a sigh. I had been here before.
"So you were the Goddess," I said openly.
A womanly figure shimmered into existence. Like before it was vague and as it spoke its voice changed in tone with each sentence but always female, "Hello, it has been some time."
"Yes… it has," I didn't know whether to smile or not.
The figure laughed, "Are you surprised?"
"You could say that."
The figure reached out and touched my face causing a warmth to spread, "Always so calm despite all that's happened. You truly do interest me."
"I have my moments," I said evenly.
"That you do. Now while I know why you have come here, I quite like the sound of you asking," the figure seemed to smirk.
"Knowing what you are now, I think my faith's become a little weaker," I sighed and moved on. "First I want to confirm something. When I kill myself, the position in time I return to is set before I did, is that right?"
"Mostly," the figure nodded. "While killing yourself will mark the day. It's not only the act of killing yourself but also the act of wanting to die or really, to give up, to well and truly want to return. At that point your gift, or curse as you may think of it, will trigger."
I frowned, "I see." Which meant the moment I gave up was the moment I truly lost. If it all I had wanted to die when we faced the Monster in the border forest… how many times would have it taken me to escape? I shook away the thought, "In that case I have to thank you. When my home Axel was destroyed I almost gave up and tried to kill myself to return. You did something to Taylor to stop me didn't you?"
The figure stepped back, "Yes. You could say I felt pity for you and did more than I should have. I'll have you know I broke a few rules for that."
"Thank you," I spoke with all my heart. If at that time I had killed myself, I was afraid of what I could have become.
"Ah yes," the figure seemed to smile, "you can be sincere when you want to be." She walked around me stepping lightly. Although I could feel myself turn to face her, my body did not move. "You have asked one question, but you have another, speak. I'm quite excited for this one."
A nervousness spread through me but I forced it down, "Lately I've had the memories of someone else interfering with my mind. Someone named Jane and most importantly not from this world but the Hero Lara's."
The Goddess giggled, "What a funny way of phrasing it."
"I need to know why I'm seeing these things and why they're affecting me so much. Can you tell me?"
The Goddess paused, stopped walking and sat down, not on the floor but an invisible chair. She folded her legs, "I can."
"Then please tell me."
"I'm looking for a question."
"What question?"
"Not that one." She seemed to enjoy my piling frustration. "I'm looking for a single question to which I can reply."
"Fine," I grit my teeth. "Who is Jane?"
For a moment I saw a true smile and a dazzling face appear as the Goddess looked at me. I understood she was beautiful but I couldn't comprehend more than that and as her voice spoke, my entire body and mind shook. Just one simple word. "You."
The vision faded and I was left stunned, "What do you mean?"
"Exactly what I said. You are Jane and Jane is you. Rain is Jane. Jane is Rain. You are one being, forgotten but one in the same." The figure stood up.
"How is that even possible?" I couldn't understand her. If I was Jane then shouldn't I remember him?
"Because we made a bargain," the figure's hand moved gently across my cheek. "You who saw your dearest friend disappear from your eyes pleaded to protect her, to find her, to be with her and I gave you that chance."
"What did I do?" my words escaped slowly.
"I offered a price and in return you would be reborn in your current world. Of course I guaranteed a safe upbringing and that you'd meet."
"So my ability to not die was you?"
The Goddess laughed and as she did so the sound vibrated through the world, "No, that power is your own."
"Then the price I paid?" As much as she was answering my question I could only feel myself become more and more perplexed.
"Your existence." The figure stepped back, "The memories of Jane and his peaceful life in return for your new one. Really no one, not even you should have remembered Jane. You would have retained his subconscious but that is all. I however underestimated the power of the Hero and she tweaked things. Her soul is truly beautiful."
"Leave Lara out of this," my words weren't a threat but begging.
"Unfortunately she is tied to this more than you know."
I heaved a sigh and stared at my bare hands, "So I'm Jane…." No wonder I felt complicated about his girly face. "Will I ever remember?"
The Goddess shrugged, "Probably."
"You know you're really not God like."
"Would you like to see me smile again?"
"No thank you. As beautiful as you were I think my brain would fry from that and that's just not worth it."
"Some would disagree."
"And those people I call idiots."
The figure laughed, "Blunt with your remarks as usual. This is why I like you. Even in front of me you do not bow fully."
"No problem," I said and looked towards her. "You talked about Lara before, just how tied is she to this world?"
"Hmmm, I can't tell you."
"Of course you can't," I sighed again. "Thank you though, for what you've done for me. Is there anything else I should know? I hope I'm not hiding any other secrets." I said jokingly.
The Goddess however smirked and once again I saw her true appearance. The power of it blinded me, causing a ripple to course across my body. "There are a few."
As the vision faded I stared at her blankly, "Wait what?"
"Oops we're out of time," she tapped her wrist as if looking at a watch.
"Hang on you can't just say that and leave!"
"Sorry, you have more important things to deal with. Bye bye."
The world began to collapse. Chunks of white fell apart to reveal a hollow black and eventually so did the ground around me. I fell reaching upwards as she looked down on me, "You-,"
*
"-Bitch!" I shot awake yelling. Damn her. Who does that? Leading me on and then just throwing me away. With how she was acting there was every chance that she was lying for fun and I had no more secrets. Really it just made it so much worse.
As my mind returned to normal I realised something wasn't right. The atmosphere around me was dark. The peaceful aura of the Temple had been shattered.
Someone coughed in pain, "Y-you know… that's not nice to say."
"Taylor?" I stood up and turned around. What I saw froze me. Bodies, dead and numbering more than ten. They wore black masks and were clearly demon. What shocked me however wasn't them but the figure of Taylor leaning against the open door, a skid of blood descending to wear she now laid on the floor. Worse still, the dagger sticking from her stomach.
"Hey," she smiled to me weakly. Her skin was deathly pale and her eyes hollow.
I rushed to her side, "What? What's going on? You- you're…." I calmed myself, "I'll fix this. Where's Marley, the other priests, they can heal you so just hold on."
She coughed and groaned as trickle of blood spilled from her mouth, "Marley… I don't know. The others… gone, maybe dead, who knows."
My eyes widened as I looked further down the corridor. The bodies of more masked demons and the occasional priest and Temple worker. I recognised the masks. They were the same as the fanatic's back in Tona. The plans they had to attack the Temple really did come true and now their blood had spilled on hallowed ground. I could hear the echoes and shouts of desperation in the distance but that didn't matter. What mattered was Taylor in front of me.
"Can you move?" I asked seriously.
"Not by myself," she groaned.
"Okay, try to hold on," I gently eased my hands underneath her. There was only one hope I could think of, the carriage still had some of my potions left. If I could just get there in time Taylor would make it.
Her teeth clenched together in pain as I stood. She was lighter than I expected as I carried her in front of me like a princess. An ironic smile split her lips, "So- so this is what it takes for you to hold me."
"Shut up and focus on staying alive," I looked down at her with a soft encouraging smile. "If you die I'm going to be pissed." She nodded.
I moved quickly through the Temple grounds hiding behind the walls and columns, trying to make my way forward as fast as I could. Occasionally I saw them. The masked demons looking for survivors. Like mad beasts they ran, some screaming, "Kill the human lovers," "Down with the Goddess," "For our Lord!" The few priests of the Temple left hid in the corners, while others tried to escape. How long had this gone for I didn't know but the attack must have been swift.
"Rain," Taylor coughed.
"Don't speak," I whispered back.
"I'm… it's okay," she smiled painfully.
"You'll make it!" I grit my teeth in desperation as we made our way past the final door. The open courtyard welcomed us and as it did so, it showed despair. The carriage was gone as was Pina. The others must have taken it to wherever they went. "No."
I collapsed to my knees, Taylor still in my arms. There had to be some way to help her. If she died now... I couldn't go back so easily.
"Rain listen," she tugged at my shirt with what little strength she had left. "I… I really do love you." Her lips curled and an incredibly weak laugh crawled out. "I really do."
I held her body up and leaned her on the ground, "Hold on Taylor. I'll do something."
She shook her head, "I'm sorry. I…," her breathing was becoming looser. Tears pooled into her eyes and dripped down her cheek. "Kiss me… just once."
I closed my eyes. Was there really nothing I could do? How weak was I now. Without Lara, Marley, the others… I was useless. No potions, no equipment and I could do nothing… not even save the girl I cared about.
"Rain?" Taylor's eye's lost their focus.
I opened my eyes and leaned closer. Our lips touched softly. There was no warmth in her skin and the tender feeling I had experienced before felt cold. A slight twitch and her lips formed a smile.
"Thank…you," she closed her eyes and fell limp.
My heart stopped. I wanted to die. I wanted to go back. To try again. But I knew I couldn't. Wanting to go back, to die was the point of no return. Taylor would never come back. I had to push forward and there was only one way I knew how to do that. Revenge. I'd kill them all. Break them. Make them regret ever laying their hands on this Temple, on Taylor, and then I'd kill the very Lord they worshipped.
I laid Taylor on the cold stone of the courtyard. The red stain on her clothes had spilled to mine. She still looked so beautiful, peaceful even. I took the dagger tied to her thigh and held it in my hand. It was heavy. With a solid step I turned around and looked back into the Temple. My feet guided me inside as my eyes turned cold. Their screams crept into my ears like a grating hollow caw. The masked demons chasing a priest, she begged for mercy as she was forced to the wall. They wouldn't give it to her.
I launched myself forward from the shadows, caution thrown to the wind. The dagger's blade sunk deep into the first demon's neck and as I pulled it free a stream of blood marred my face. By the time the second reacted he had his chest impaled. The remaining two faced me with swords drawn. The priest's eyes widened in fear and she ran for the exit, their attention now firmly on me.
"Kill him!" one shouted.
I parried his strike to the side, "Oh you better because if you don't. I'll be the last thing you ever see." They were nothing more than a mob armed with steel. Although the two demons held a frightening fury, compared to Earnest they were like children playing. Still, I wasn't much better. As the two rushed me, I cut under ones guard forcing him to his knees. His partner charged and nicked my arm as I dodged back. A second later Taylor's dagger crushed into his scalp killing him instantly. As the last masked demon tried to stand I finished him mercilessly. My eyes already moving onto the next prey.
The sounds of fighting came from the distance towards the living quarters of the Temple. I sprinted without care, making as much noise as I could. As I turned the corner I saw them. Lady Tillia on the ground injured as Daryl stood with a sword in his hands above her. One of his arms hung limp at his side. Surrounding them on all sides were six masked demons.
"Run Daryl!" Lady Tillia yelled determinedly.
"No! I refuse. These men are here because of me," his expression hardened. "I won't leave your fate to them."
A masked demon laughed, "After we kill you, we'll burn her and this Temple to the ground. Only we demons will remain. All hail the Lord! Not even the Goddess can stop us!"
"Come then!" Daryl roared and they charged.
I wouldn't make it in time. Even as I crashed into view of them and cut through their backs. Daryl had already been impaled. As skilled as he may have been, it had been too much. The remaining demons turned to me. I had never fought so many people at once and as they jumped towards me I could only firm my resolve. I'd have Taylor's revenge.
It was a bloody mess. Even as I used the technique Taylor taught me, my chest tightening in pain, their eyes losing sight of me, Taylor's dagger in my hand, their swords swinging wildly, I couldn't stop myself from getting hurt. As much as I tried, they attacked almost aimlessly, cutting through my clothes and skin through sheer luck. I brought them down one by one but not before feeling a gutting pain as a sword found its way through my stomach. The look of surprise on his face told me he couldn't believe it either. A moment later I stabbed him in return, letting go as he fell to death. In the end we were all amateurs.
They were dead. The soft ground now muddied with blood. The smell stuck to my lungs and the once fresh air was putrid. I staggered towards where Lady Tillia cradled Daryl's lifeless body. The hilt of a knife still stuck above where his heart laid beneath. I collapsed beside them, the sword in my stomach forcing further inside as it knocked against the earth. Blood spewed from my mouth.
"Thank you for trying," Lady Tillia was eerily calm as she stroked Daryl's paling face. Her green skin now a light shade closer to blue.
I couldn't speak and just nodded.
"We go to the Goddess together." It was only then did I notice the arrow sticking from her back. So she had been hit already. Damn it all, I couldn't even save one person. My vision began to darken and the pain inside lessen. In front of me Lady Tillia continued to hold Daryl lovingly. The image of Taylor lying cold and alone spurred me awake once more as I slowly dragged myself back towards the Temple courtyard. A single metre was all I crawled and as the darkness became more pronounced I could only sigh.