As much as I wanted to be alone, to escape, I had work to do. Supplies needed to be bought for the journey across the border, the carriage needed to be in tip top shape, swords sharpened, armour polished and potions were to be made. I sat inside the carriage boiling the various solutions while slowly working on Ronalt's shield.
A knock on the door and I looked up. I didn't say a word and continued to work. The door opened regardless.
"You're actually here," the Her-Lara looked at me surprised. "I thought you would be somewhere alone."
"There's a lot I need to do," I put down Ronalt's shield and began to tend to my mixtures.
Lara sat down awkwardly nearby, "What you said in the inn… was it true? You're being forced to be here? Because if that's the case, if I tell them maybe I could-."
"That wouldn't change a thing," I sighed. Even if it was the Queens orders, some noble somewhere could hire an assassin to hurt someone I loved just to prove a point. I couldn't risk that. "Forget about it.
"I see…," her voice trailed away and with nothing to do she simply sat and watched. I didn't care. As long as she was quiet and didn't interfere she could do whatever.
Tens of minutes passed as I moved in and out of the carriage multi-tasking as much as I could. Lara's eyes followed me but her body remained still. Finally as I picked up a finished potion her mouth opened to say something but quickly closed.
"If you have something to say, say it," my tone was harsher than I meant.
"Ah," she flustered. "W-what are you making?"
I took out a knife and cut into my skin. Lara immediately stood up in panic but I held her back with a small gesture. As the blood seeped out I poured a small amount of the bottled liquid over the wound and took a small sip. Within seconds the cut became nothing, showing pure unblemished skin instead. As expected of fine ingredients, they were much more effective than what I made at home.
"It's a healing potion. In case something happens to Marley or she's busy," I said as she finally settled down.
"You scared me," she took a deep breath. "This world… it really is strange."
I sighed, "You don't even know half of it. To me you're all strange."
"What do you mean?" she blinked her eyes at me.
"Do you even realise how terrifyingly powerful you all are?" I laughed coldly. "I saw you beat back that creature in the cave. I've seen Marley bring someone back from the brink of death. I can't even follow Earnest when he's serious. Taylor can disappear before my eyes. Ronalt could crush me in his hands and Ardent could burn down an entire forest on a simple whim. Normal people can't do that. Sometimes we have barely enough food to go around."
She looked down away from me. Her hands tightened into fists settling on her lap. I said too much.
"Sorry," I began awkwardly, "everyone here earned their strength by their own hands. Besides, you're our hope against the demons."
Lara turned her face towards me with watery eyes, "You're wrong. I haven't earned anything. I don't even know what I'm doing! My world, my home doesn't have magic and the first thing that happens when I arrived was being asked to help. How could I say no? Everyone praised me, how strong I became and how fast I learned… but I haven't done anything yet."
Without realising it my hand was on her head gently rubbing her hair. We were both surprised. It was strange, me doing this felt natural and foreign at the same time and I didn't know if I should stop.
Instead words left my lips, "You're doing your best and that's all that matters. For what it's worth, thank you." After all I had said today, after all I had felt these past weeks, all my deaths, not once did I consider how she felt, how Lara felt. Dragged to a new world, practically forced to be a Hero and forced to defeat the Demon Lord. Compared to me she really did have the weight of the world on her shoulders.
Her hand rose up slowly and held mine against her head. For a moment she did nothing else and seemed to relax. Her breath came out gently and when she looked at me her eyes were once more resolute. Pure and filled with an innocence that I couldn't comprehend. I removed my hand.
She smiled, "Your words… they mean a lot, really. Thank you."
"N-no problem," my heart beat uncomfortably.
"Is there anything you need help with?"
"I'm fine," I returned her smile although weakly. "Actually could you check on Marley, I think I scared her before and if you see Ronalt, tell him I'm not going to run away." How could I? Even if the Monster meant my death, I knew inside I'd just come back to try again. The others didn't know what was coming. Sure they might not realise just how screwed we were but I couldn't give up.
"No problem," Lara stood up and as she left the carriage she turned back. "Rain, I promise you no matter what happens tomorrow, we'll make it." And for whatever reason I believed her.
*
I couldn't sleep. It was ironic that the day I needed rest the most I couldn't. Humans were weird like that. Sometimes no matter how much we knew something was needed we just couldn't do it. I sighed and flung my legs off the roof of the carriage. My body was tired after all I had done but my mind was bursting with anxiety.
With slow steps I washed my face from the bucket of water nearby and looked out into the streets. It was dark but not too late. The taverns would still be full of people and if I wanted to I could join them. It was tempting. To lose myself in drink and forget my troubles. I gripped my hand into a fist. I couldn't afford to screw up now. I'd let myself relax later but first the Monster needed to be dealt with.
I decided to take a walk to tire myself. The cool breeze was refreshing against my skin and thin grey leaves danced across the ground as the wind blew through. I remembered the first time I had come through here, that first week with the Hero- with Lara. Back then I had kept to myself more than any other cycle and I hardly knew a thing about them. I remember walking the streets alone after finally having some time to myself, staring into the forest that marked the border. Back then I was nervous but hopeful to return home and when I died… it had been so sudden that I could barely feel the fear.
"So you're here," Taylor's voice came from behind me. I turned to her with a tired smile. Even the last time we passed through Greytree she had spent the night in some other inn with Goddess knows who. If I mentioned that to her now she'd probably get mad.
"Were you looking for me?" I asked.
She shook her head, "No. I was just coming back from getting a drink."
"You didn't find any local 'talent'?" I couldn't help mention it.
Like I thought a slight anger marred her brow, "Do you think I have time for that after all you said?"
"Sorry," the word left my lips before I could understand why I said it.
Taylor was taken aback, "No- it's not your fault. I'm refraining as well…."
I laughed, "You really have changed way too much."
"What's that supposed to mean?" she frowned.
"Nothing, it's nice. If I have to do it again I might just put in the effort."
"You're not making sense."
"I know," I leant against a nearby wall.
Taylor walked closer and leaned her back next to mine, "Umm about what I said before, how you trying your best made me want to. I didn't know you were under so much pressure… sorry."
I faced her. She was showing the oddest expression. Funny even. She was embarrassed and at the same time trying to show her sincerity.
"We all have our own problems," I couldn't help look at her neck where the slave collar glowed ominously. I hadn't been paying attention to it but just having that thing on… how did the townspeople we walked by look at her? Most wouldn't be able to tell, but the few who could….
She breathed the night air and moved off the wall, "I'm off to bed, goodnight."
"Goodnight and… thanks for the chat," I said sincerely. It really had calmed me down.
"You know you could come with me," she smiled seductively and ever so slightly pushed out her chest.
"Looks like some things don't change so easily," I chuckled. "By the way that's also my answer."
"Too bad," with that she walked away.
I made my own way back taking a longer route to pass through the inn's courtyard. My instincts were telling me it would be a good idea to take a look and indeed they were right. Standing in the centre with a spiral of lights around him, Ardent stood as a stream of words I couldn't comprehend spilled from his mouth. A wave of heat passed through me as an orb of light escaped from his chest and flew up into the sky. It was the same spell I had seen him use in Stonewall.
"It's my insurance," Ardent said tiredly as he ended the spell. "I said before I don't like leaving things to fate."
"May I ask exactly what that insurance is?" I asked curiously as the orb floated off into space.
Ardent smiled, he was always keen to talk about magic, "As you know mana is absorbed by the earth. All living things take mana within them but everything has a finite amount it can hold. Yes this amount changes and can grow but it is finite nonetheless. To supplement ourselves we use crystals and other objects to supply mana we don't have but what if we don't have those? This is a magic I made especially for that."
Well colour me confused. I looked at him, "That didn't explain much."
"I'm getting to that," he laughed. "You can't store mana without a container or the earth will take it away. So I thought why not store it far away? At a large enough distance the mana itself will remain untouched and ready for me to use."
I was starting to understand him which made me realise just how far fetched the idea was. "You're concentrating mana and storing it in space?" I pointed upwards.
"Quite astute of you," he looked up as the orb become nothing more than another light in the sky. "I'm not sure how much mana reaches up there or how exactly I can use it but I feel it waiting. So every day when I believe it is safe I expend my mana and turn it the sky. Years of my life are floating up there somewhere like stars in the sky. I believe it is a poetic thought."
"That's crazy," I shook my head.
"Indeed many have told me so but one day we'll see just how handy it is and I have a feeling that day may be very soon," he patted my shoulder. "I am quite tired and you should rest as well. Till tomorrow Rain."
"Yes… till tomorrow."