(Dazai Crowley's POV)
Cerulean Academy, Present Day
For some reason, I decided to follow Ryoku into the next aisle over. It was then I suddenly found myself in the middle of the cosmetic aisle. But by the time I realized it however, it was too late.
—A dreadful sensation coursed through my nose.
I recoil a little, covering my nose from the shock.
"Is something the matter?"
Ryoku notices my unnatural movement.
"It burns…."
"Burns?"
"....Ah, Nevermind."
I guess girls are impervious to this kind of thing, huh.
I wish I could say the same for myself though.
For as long as I could remember, I always had a very sensitive nose. So heavy smells like perfumes, candles and even my own sweat could cause my nose to itch. It's like a natural weakness of mine. Because of that, I usually tend to stay far, far away from cosmetic aisles. Well unless I need to go fetch some laundry detergent or something.
But at that point, I guess even hygiene can become a necessary evil, huh.
Either way, I should probably walk away.
Wait, no, I'm already in too deep now, so I might as well commit and wait until Ryoku is finished.
Ugh, but my nose is killing me though.
I'll probably just hold my breath or something.
I can hold my breath for up to ten minutes underwater after all, so this should be no problem, right?
—Ah, but if Ryoku notices, she'll probably think I'm just doing something weird, wouldn't she?
Yeah, no, that would be bad. I'd rather avoid being seen in an unfavorable light if possible.
Sigh.
What a strange predicament I found myself in.
Actually, it's more like I created one myself.
"Hey, Dazai?"
"Hmm?"
"Which one do you think I should get? Oh, and be honest, please."
As she asks that, she takes two bottles off the nearby shelf and presents them to me.
The first was a small yet elegant shaped bottle of shampoo. Lavender scented. Quite expensive too.
The second was a large yet drabby shaped bottle of hair conditioner. Peppermint scented. Not my favorite. Clearly the polar opposite of the other.
I wonder why she's asking me this.
Wait, no, that doesn't matter. She just wants a second opinion, right?
But in that case, personal preference aside, shouldn't the answer be quite obvious?
"That one."
I point towards the bottle of shampoo.
"This one? I see. So you're the type of guy who only cares about looks, huh. How disappointing."
"—What? No, that's not what I meant at all!"
"Oh? So then why'd you pick this one then?"
"Well, I thought girls liked cute, expensive things."
"Ah, so you mean your "honest opinion" was swayed by some gender misconception?"
I raised my finger for a moment.
Only to let it down, the next.
"...Fair point."
I'm really not in the mood for some pointless back to back banter right now.
On an unrelated note, the couple I noticed from before happened to be in the same aisle as us.
That girl did say she was looking for shampoo…
"Hmph, in any case, I think I'll get this one."
I turn back towards Ryoku.
"Wait, you're still getting the expensive one?"
"What? I like cute and expensive things."
"...You hypocrite!"
She chuckles playfully.
She then pulled out another box from a nearby shelf. To me however, it was an unexpected item.
"You're getting a razor blade?"
"Why so surprised? Girls have hair too, you know."
"Ah, true."
Hair, huh…
I size up Ryoku for a moment.
That's right, although they don't have much as guys do, girls still have hair in certain places.
….Places like the legs, armpits, and even—
"—Are you thinking of something inappropriate?"
"Huh, what makes you say that?"
"You were staring at my legs quite intensely."
….Oh, she meant that.
"Ah, sorry. I was just wondering if it was about time for me to shave mine too…"
"Suuure~"
"Hey, what's with that smug face!?"
On a completely, totally unrelated note however, I wouldn't mind having the opportunity to personally thank whoever invented skirts and thigh-highs. They are truly a blessing on this wonderful world. In God's name, amen.
"Why are you praying right now?"
"Don't worry about it."
"I see."
Ryoku turns back towards the shelves.
"I think I'll buy….—these as well."
She picks out a special box of unscented tissues and adds it to her basket.
Man, I could go for some, right about now.
I rubbed my dry nose a little.
The two of us continued to shop around.
"Alright, I'm about finished."
"Done already?"
"Yeah, but what about you though? There seemed to be a lot of things that interest you, yet you didn't pick even out a single thing."
"I only came here to window shop."
"That's bad for business, you know."
"If you paid for something every time you entered a store, I'm pretty sure you would end up broke."
"Then just buy something cheap and affordable. Easy."
"That'll only get you so far, though."
As we continued bickering(?), we approached the cash register by the front of the store. Suddenly though, I heard chuckles coming from behind us.
When I glanced back, it was the same couple from before.
"Hey, why don't we ever bicker like them two?", the girlfriend asked.
"What? Why would you ever want us to argue?"
"Because that's what comes with being a couple, right?"
"Well even if it is, it ain't for me. I'm not the type of guy who likes to argue anyways."
As a fellow man, I agree.
—Also, wait a second, did that girl just assumed we were a couple? Well, that's embarrassing.
Ah, but it'd probably be worse for Ryoku then, huh. I glance over to the girl in question.
"Something the matter?"
"Ah, no, it's nothing."
I immediately looked away.
"Uh, okay then…"
Hmm, it seems she wasn't bothered by them at all. I guess my worries were one-sided then.