Artica:
Sitting at the head of the table, a plate of eggs and toast sat in front of me while everyone coddled a bowl of rice porridge. Guilt gnawed at me, everyone's eyes begging for me to eat my food. Egg shells were visible in my eggs, the only way to describe my toast was charred. The room for improvement certainly showed itself with the plate in front of me, the polite side of me told me to find a way to eat it. Sipping my tea, the special plant settled my stomach. Picking out the egg shells, they all watched with disappointment in their eyes. Guilt ate at me, my intentions were to make the meal edible.
"Thank you for the meal." I commented irritably, attempting to remedy the situation. "Might I suggest that you crack the eggs into a separate bowl before putting them into the pan. Then you can pick out the shells instead of me. Other than that you did great." Continuing to pick out the eggshells, exhaustion hung heavily on my eyelids. Pushing the plate away, the dishes rattled as I laid my head down. Sage plopped down closer to me, a sea of worried glances passed my way. Now wasn't the moment to show my weakness, the chair groaning as I stood up. Taking the pieces of toast, my vision blurred. The side effect of drowsiness of the tea began to take its hold due the insomnia haunting me. Shaking it off, my ears flattened. Leaning on the wall, my extended claws dug into the wall. Pull yourself together! Everyone needs you to lead.
"I just started my new medication so please be patient with me. The couple bites of eggs that I took were delicious. I am off to bed." I thanked them politely, hiding the intense pain raging in my gut. Using the wall, a sigh of relief flooded from my lips the moment I collapsed onto the bed. Pulling myself up to the pillow, my trembling hands crushed the toast. Snapping my fingers, the crumbs faded to white balls of light. A new sensation came over me, a sharp ring started a crazy migraine. Apparently migraines were a side effect of the new drug, the slightest bit of light made it throb violently. Putting my pillow over my head, silent tears stained my cheeks. My vision blurred, sweet slumber stealing me away.
My feet stood in the endless ocean, the foam crashed over my feet. The sounds of my screams shattered the air, the scene shifting to my first day in prison. The cold walls of my cell towered over me, the orange jumpsuit clung to my now seventeen year old body. My identity had been found out, several prisoners had already tried to kill me. My cellmate walked into the room, her sheer presence was enough to paralyze me. The seven foot seven woman was muscle bound, the black iron shackles had drained the last of my powers. My shoes had already been stolen, the rest of my shampoo laid buried in the hole behind my poster of the president. Her thin straight hair hung around her shoulders, her large hand pinned me to the wall. Where was my way out! Police officers never did well in jail, the murder rate of my kind was right up there with child molesters.
"You need to quit being a sucker-ducker, you fucking pig." She growled through gritted teeth, slamming my head into the wall repeatedly. "That means stop avoiding conflict, piggy pig." Trembling in her power, I needed to get into solitary confinement before I fucking died a miserable death. Who the hell puts a cop in with the general population? A makeshift shank shimmered in her hand, the blade stabbed me repeatedly. Releasing me from her grasp, the heel of my foot slammed into her jaw. Kicking the shank out of her hand, my free hand caught it. Gliding it across her throat, ruby painted my face. Her body dropped to the cracked floor, her blood pooled at my feet. Twenty prisoners rushed me, several fists and feet pounded my body into a pulp. Ditching me to suffer, my arms screamed in protest as I dragged myself out of my cell. Dread bubbled in my stomach, a prisoner called out the last words I wanted to hear.
"A pig is in our block, ladies! She just killed one of us and now she has to pay!" A random female voice called out, my mind screaming at me to move. Struggling to my feet, bruises dotted my skin. Limping down the stairs, I needed a safe space. Shit! Nothing jumped out. A single fist slammed into my chest, the breath got knocked out of me. Collapsing to my knees, my arms crossed into the x shape.
"Cut the shit!" The warden called out, his stubby fingers picking me up by my tail. "I have plans for you. I am going to make you wish you were in the general population. How about that, my pets? I am going to humiliate her. Do I have your approval?" Cheers erupted behind me, my own blood dripping on my face. His shiny bald head came into my blurring vision, his short chubby body glistened with sweat. Yellow pit stains colored his white suit, my fate doomed to drive me insane. Tossing me over his shoulders, my heart rate sped up. Metal flashed by me, my body jolted the moment he slammed it behind him. Clicking the lock behind him, the sound of his belt falling to the floor alarmed me. His stubby fingers picked up the letter opener from his desk. Each pop of my buttons exposed more of my body, his sweaty palms cupping my breasts. Tears welled up in my eyes, his other hand stripping off my jumpsuit.
"Help!" I cried out desperately, my voice cracking. "Help me!" Shoving his belt into my mouth, he bent me over the desk. Knowing what was next, a bloodcurdling scream burst from my lips the moment he jammed himself in. Blood dripped down my legs, each thrust destroying my mental health. His lamp rattled each time, my eyes focused on the sun bathed garden. What a fucking false front! Hours passed like this, my hatred growing by the second. The sound of him zipping up his pants released me from the trance keeping my sanity. Dragging me over to a metal plate on the floor, his wicked grin only sickened me as he clicked chains to my shackles. Crouching down to my level, his thumb traced my cheek. Ripping my face from his hand, he ran his hand up my thigh. Scrambling back, this man had stolen what belonged to me. Shame mixed with rage, my eyes refusing to meet his.
"I took your precious virginity, and there is nothing you can do about it." He gloated with a disgusting grin, the back of his hand smacking my face. A snarl twitched on my lips, the chains ratting with pure rage. A needle shimmered in his hand, the small prick feeling like nothing.
"Leave me alone!" I pleaded brokenly, the tears never ending. "Put me back in the general population. I was only defending myself. I was only defending myself. If you don't stop, you will get killed by me. You can only push someone so far before they break!" Maniacal laughter exploded from his lips, his shoes clicking away.
"Sage." I sobbed softly, wishing his arms were around my waist. "Sage! Sage! I need you so much right now. A bad man took what belonged to you. I am no longer pure. I am sorry. I am so sorry." The sun rose up, then the moon. The days all played out the same, months had passed to the day I finally snapped. The hollow sound of his footsteps sent me into my primal setting, my claws extended from my fingernails. Hiding them underneath my thighs, my fangs grew involuntarily. Unlocking my chains from my shackles, shock widened his eyes the moment my fangs ripped out his throat. Ruby painted my face, his ribs crunching as I ripped out his heart. No, this wasn't good enough. No, this wasn't good enough. Splashing through the growing pool of blood, my fingers snatched the letter opener off of his desk. Sitting on his lap, a primal scream burst from my lips with every stab. The door burst open, the full gravity of the situation hitting me. My body trembled, the letter opener clattering to the ground. The pool of blood swallowed it whole, the chaos fading in and out. Putting my hands up, they dragged me to a white padded cell.
"Two days until your execution." A faceless guard grunted gruffly, my head bowing in shame. "We are going to hang you like the monster you are. The dried blood should be a nice touch. We will dress you in your finest and cart you around like the prize you are. No one will ever know what he did to you. His death will be honorable while yours is dishonorable." Collecting my nerves, I wasn't going to die. Not here, not like a wild animal. No was going to tote me like a prize to show off. Saying nothing, I let them close the door. Wiping the blood off of my lips, a wicked grin danced across my lips. These cells had a weak spot, my claws shredding the white padding. Clearly, I thought I was going to end up here. A bomb greeted me, the only thing needed was a code to activate it. Sliding it to the center of the door, my fingers punched in the code. Sharp beeps echoed in the air, my body curling into a ball. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one! The blast knocked the door down, red lights bathed the halls. A shrill alarm echoed in the air, the first guard received a good punch to the face. Stealing his armor, it was a little big from the starvation they had put me through. Listening to their orders, I slipped away into the evidence room down the hall. Using the guard's card, the door hummed open. A crooked grin danced across from my lips at the sight of my staff, my fingers wrapping around its smooth surface. Hugging it to my chest, the shackles crumbled to dust. Crashing down the halls, no one batted an eye. Skidding outside, the fresh air felt so nice. Peeling off my glove, one claw extended from my fingernails. Digging the tracking chip out, my boot crushed it. Ripping off the helmet, a familiar bike drove by. My breath hitched, Sage's energy relaxed my nerves. It took everything I had to run in the opposite direction to the bunker. Hours passed of me walking, my feeble body collapsing at the entrance to the bunker. The metal squeaked open, Mouse popping her head out. Home, I was home.
Snapping awake, the blood was still on my hands. Sage clutched me close to his chest, my chest aching. Each breath grew shallower, my heart beat sped up to a mile a minute. Clammy sweat drenched my skin, every scar began to breathe with new life. His lips brushed the top of my head, my eyes couldn't meet his.
"I am sorry for letting him take what you deserved. I am sorry for letting him take me over and over again. I did what I had to do to survive." I blurted out brokenly, the corner of my lips quivered. "I'm so freaking sorry!" Shaking his head, he kissed the top of my head.
"I can't imagine what it is liked to be raped everyday." He muttered oddly, confusion dawned on my face. "I saw your dream. I was in the gym training him when I fainted. One thing though? Why didn't you wave me down? No one else was around, so why did you let me go? I could have avoided my own prison time. We could have been together sooner!" His last sentence threw me off, a lump forming in my throat.
"I would have turned around and taken you to where you needed to go!" He continued bitterly, my panic attack growing worse. "Shit. I am so sorry for making you feel worse. We can discuss this later. Take deep breaths until you calm down. I used to get these all of the time." Taking a deep breath, my nerves settled down slowly. His annoyance had a solid base, my fingers grasping desperately at his chest.
"It's okay." I deflected instantly, not wanting him to feel any worse. "It took years of living with Mouse and building my refugee camp to get me to where I am today. Mouse held me for weeks after. She made me eat when I didn't want to. I owe Mouse my life and she doesn't know it. I know you are concerned about the sex we have but I am fine. The difference is that you ask for consent. I am just going to need a break for a bit. Can you grant me that?" Kissing the top of my head, a soft chuckle escaped his lips.
"I am not married to you because of the sex but for your personality. I love you for the compassionate leader you are. Take your time." He promised sweetly, lifting my chin with his finger. "We can work through it together. May I kiss you?" Nodding silently, his lips pressed against mine tenderly. The kiss did little to help me, his relieved grin making it all a bit better. Hide your pain, make sure no one sees it. Too scared to sleep, he passed me the fennec fox mask and diamonds.
"Can you get me some ice tea?" I asked weakly, hoping he would take the bait. "I am thirsty and I think I need some sleep." Eager to please, he bounced off the bed. Picking up the mask, the only thing keeping me sane was dropping the diamonds into their place. Telling myself it was only a dream, nothing seemed to work. How could I forget how it felt to lose your hope? Had I fallen so far that I simply chose to forget the way my trauma poisoned my life? A knock interrupted me from deep trance, Mouse poked her head in.
"My brother told me that you had another nightmare conjoined with another panic attack." She uttered cautiously, sitting down next to me. "I want to thank you for the freedom you have given me. Lay down for me. I can finish the mask for you while I sing you to sleep. I am aware that insomnia is your answer to everything." Shaking my head, she laid me down. Taking the mask in her hands, our song flowed freely with both of us singing.
"The moon lights up the sky, our spirits soar high. Let's fly like the fireflies and light up the night. Let's sing into the sky." We sang beautifully, her hand resting on my bump. "I'll show you a world of light where the shadows no longer bite. Let's be free! Let's be free!" Smiling warmly at each other, she laid down next to me while placing the last diamond in its place. Turning to face me, her big eyes shimmered with tears.
"Don't quit on life like you almost did that day." She pleaded sweetly, resting her head on my chest. "I need you in mine. You made me your sister the day you met me. I figured that this would happen eventually. Can I sleep with you tonight?" Embracing her with a motherly manner, her snores soon echoed in my ears. Kissing the top of her forehead, teardrops soaked the top of her head. Mouse had always been one of my rocks, another knock interrupting me. Tatiana slid into bed behind me, her white summer dress brushed against my bare skin. Her bat ears flattened, her lips pressing into an adorable pout.
"I had a nightmare." She whispered frightfully into my back, her stuffed animal hanging in the crook of her elbow. "You died from your sickness and needed to be by you." Her tears soaked my back, her fingers gripped my sweatshirt. Rolling onto my back, I pulled her onto my chest. Playing with her hair, she reminded me of the small child I had met so many years ago. The warmth radiated off of them, the pureness of their love bringing me back to my center.
"I promise I won't leave you, Batty." I assured her warmly, her head snuggling into the palm of my hand. "I am okay, I promise. The legends say I have nine lives, and I am impossible to kill." Her wet eyes met mine, her head shaking. My false cheery tone failed to fool her, her fingers gripping my sweatshirt.
"I watched Sage break without you and you are behaving the same way." She pointed out seriously, cupping my hand. "He cried every night. When he would have nightmares, he called your name. He always called your name, no matter what. He plotted ways to get you back to him. I was never his partner, you always were. I don't know what they did to you in prison but it changed you. You used to smile more and he used to smile more as well. They stole your smiles away and I want to kill them for that. Don't worry about me. I am so happy that you are holding me right now. I missed your embrace when you disappeared. Bedtime had always been my favorite part of my day back then. Can you hum me a lullaby to go to sleep?" Humming a gentle song, her snores soon matched Mouse's. Sunny crawled into bed next to Mouse, her bright smile melting my heart. Glue, I had always been the glue to hold everyone together. What happens if the glue dissolves.
"Hey, I felt lonely. Can I sleep with you?" She begged adorably, flashing me her puppy dog eyes. Rolling my eyes, my girls needed me. Motioning for her to pull the blanket over us, she complied with an excited grin. Proceeding to tell me about her day, my eyes fell on a smiling Sage in the doorway. Alfred hovered behind him, an unimpressed expression dimmed his face. Waving to me, Sage had found his first shadow that wasn't his little sister. Such a sight helped my nerves relax, proving the point that we were like everyone's parents in a way. Living in the moment, a long sigh escaped my lips. Closing my eyes for a minute a field of colorful flowers surrounded me. My three female friends waved me over, the warm sun bathed me. Our white summer dresses danced in the breeze, my real smile brightened my face. One day this would be all of us.