I grunted angrily as my daily alarm beeped. It was a Saturday and I was so happy I could sleep in. The past weeks have been pretty hectic. From assignments to tests and library readings. I had to keep up to not forfeit my scholarship. The incident with Christopher created a wedge between Khalil and me. We never had a conversation about it but things became awkward. He was still his sweet and caring self but something changed. I would randomly think of Christopher but I was too ashamed to pick up the phone to text him and the longer I put off talking to him, the more guilty I felt.
"What do you say, babe? It's been a while since we've all hanged out and I just want us to get together before exams" Amira said. She wanted us all to hang out and make the most of it. She suggested a sleepover at her parent's house and no one else protested. Everyone was eager to have a relaxing weekend and let off some steam. I protested going because I was avoiding Christopher but trust Amira to get me to change my mind.
"Okay okay, no need to get all pouty" I answered
"Yay" she squeaked happily
Just a few hours before the said time Christopher messaged the group and suggested we have a plus one to make it more fun. Everyone agreed obviously and I asked Khalil to join me. He has been on my neck about meeting my friends and he didn't want me alone in the same room as Christopher.
"I know my parents are away but I don't want you thrashing the house, please. let's all be reasonable adults" Amira warned everyone.
"Zeenat" Kate said
"Kate" I answered. She came alone with the excuse of being informed too late. Amira is a lone wolf too but only because Gregory was an older guy and it wasn't his ideal scene. Jabari came with a new girl, Kat, Aya came with Toni and I brought Khalil with me. I introduced him to everyone and we got settled in.
"Sleeping situation Stone?" Kate asked
"Girls in my room and boys in the visitor's room" Amira answered.
"Why can't we sleep in pairs?" Kate asked
"Well not all of us are here with someone and if you aren't okay with it, you're welcome to leave" Amira answered
"Aggressive much" Kate said but Amira just walked away.
"What was that about?" I asked Amira
"I just can't stand the girl. She's so manipulative, I just can't " Amira replied, shrugging with disdain.
"True that" I said
"Hey Christopher " I heard Kate say
"Not today satan" he replied and walked away from her. I smiled wickedly but I wasn't proud of it.
"Hi" I said after I finally worked up the courage to talk to him.
"Hi" he said without showing interest in talking to me.
"Look, I am sorry for what happened the other day. I don't think that of you at all okay" I continued
"It's all good Zeenat" he said abruptly and left to welcome the girl who walked in. He hasn't called me Zeenat in a long time and I knew for sure he was still mad at me. I saw the girl who walked in and instantly recalled her face. It was the girl I saw with Christopher at Greg's party. I suddenly felt nauseous.
"Are you okay babe?" Khalil asked with concern
"I'm good, just swallowed a dose of karma" I answered
"What?" he asked
"I said I'm good" I snapped at him
"What is with you?" he snapped back angrily
"Nothing, I'm so sorry Khalil. I just felt faint for a second" I replied having realised how mean I was to him.
"Okay" he answered embarrassingly
After setting up snacks, Amira called everyone to sit and interact. I was rather dull because Christopher kept ignoring me. Khalil on the other hand was just annoyingly sweet and available.
"I'm bored guys, let's play a game" Kate said
"That sounds nice, what game?" Jabari answered
"Truth or dare sounds nice" Kat said excitedly
"No!" my friends and I screamed
"Did something happen?" Khalil asked. We exchanged looks and shake our heads.
"Relax guys, I have a game card" Amira said before placing a sealed box on the table.
"Game card" Khalil asked
"Yes a game card. Everyone is to pick a card at random and do whatever is written on it" Amira explained
"And if I don't want to?" Khalil asked
"Then you'd take a shot" Amira answered again
"What if I don't want to do that either?" Khalil asked. It was obvious everyone found his questions annoying and frankly, so did I.
"Then I guess you're out of the game holier than thou" Christopher said.
"We'll see" Khalil said angrily.
"Who's down?" Amira asked
"I am" I answered excitedly but for some reason, Khalil seemed surprised by my excitement.
"Can we start already jeez" Yvonne retorted
"Have a chill pill okay!" I snapped angrier than I had intended to. Everyone looked surprised at my unwarranted comment.
"Hey don't talk to her like that " Christopher said
"Whatever " I whispered. I didn't mean to be this way but seeing Yvonne with Christopher was bothering me more than it should. I have the best boy as my boyfriend but yet I was jealous of Yvonne. Jealousy is making me petty and I hate it.
"It's fine babe" Yvonne said as she held Christopher by his arm.
I rolled my eyes in annoyance.
"I'll go first y'all" Aya said with the hope of breaking the awkward silence and unsurprisingly, it worked.
"My card says I should tell the person next to me who I fancy the most in the group" Aya read out
"Okay" Amira said, hyping Aya. I was sitting next to her and she whispered in my ear she fancied Amira. I widened my eyes out of surprise because I expected her girlfriend to be who she fancied the most.
"My turn " Toni said with excitement
"Give the person in front of you a lap dance" Toni read out. Jabari was the one in front of her and she went over and gave him a lap dance. Kat frowned and eyed Toni but Toni ignored her and completed her task.
"Don't front Kat, he should be the threatened one. I'm into girls" Toni tried to assure her but it came across as flirting and Kat blushed.
"Why you gotta be like that Toni" Aya said joking
"My bad girl, you know I got eyes for you alone" Toni said and everyone burst out laughing, even Khalil. I like the fact that he was opening up.
"Looks like it's your turn" Christopher said to Kate
" Yeah it is " Kate answered whilst smiling but Christopher looked away and the smile faded. I kind of feel sorry for her because now I know how she feels but she made her bed and now she has to lie in it. Perhaps if she wasn't so manipulative and fake she'd still be in Christopher's life.
"Okay, it says I should ask the person in front of me what their deepest desire is. Okay what the fuck? This isn't even a real task. It's more of a task for him" she said and threw the card away angrily.
"Chill out Marshall, it's just a game" Amira answered
"Whatever Stone. Christopher, what is your deepest desire?" she asked reluctantly
"At the moment, it's to get a moment alone with this beautiful girl right here" he said romantically to Yvonne. It felt like he was purposely trying to hurt me at this point.
"Aww babe" Yvonne replied
"I think you should go next Khalil" Amira said trying to include Khalil.
"Okay, I'm supposed to pick someone to kiss and ask the person to rate the kiss on a scale of one to ten " he said after reading his card.
He came to kiss me of course and I rated the kiss a ten.
"I'll go next" I answered and when I reached for a card my finger grazed Christopher's arm as he reached for a card too.
"You can go" I said before clearing my throat. He looked unbothered and he picked up his card.
"Pick the third girl sitting next to you and stay in a closed space with her for seven minutes" he read out loud. We all counted in anticipation of who the girl is and I was shocked to see the third finger on me.
"Who else is getting de-Ja-Vu?" Amira asked, Jabari and Aya nodded in agreement.
"No way in hell am I doing this with her" Christopher said. It stung to hear the man who used to worship me say this but he had a reason to be this way. I have to talk to him because this attitude of his is killing me.
"Wait, am I missing something? What's with the weird energy I'm getting from you two? Chris? Zee?" Amira said but I was mute.
"I'm just going to skip this amy" Christopher said
"Well then take a shot" Amira answered
"Oh no, I can't do that. I can't risk my sobriety" he replied
"I guess you're out then" Khalil retorted. I knew he only said that to shade Christopher but it didn't help matters.
"Let's do it then" he said as he pulled me away.
We went into what looked like Amira's room and it was awkward even more. I sat on the bed and he moved the chair to the far end to sit.
"I'm sorry I didn't defend you and I'm sorry I allowed Khalil to believe that about you. I wasn't trying to make you a bad guy I promise. Khalil made his conclusions about you based on some misunderstood things I told him and I'm sorry I did not correct it" I said as I moved closer to him
"Don't come here" he said
"Please Chris, you know I'd never do that on purpose and you know I don't think that of you at all" I said
"You are so confusing, Zeenat. It shouldn't even matter that I'm mad at you. You have made it clear you have a boyfriend now and want nothing to do with me so what is the point of this apology" he answered
"It matters to me Christopher and you know why. You also know I'm in an impossible situation with Khalil and I can't just break his heart" I replied
"So you'd rather break mine?" he asked
"You're the one doing the breaking here. You brought Yvonne here and what's with all the loving up? You did not even put my feelings into consideration" I answered
"Like you put mine into consideration?"
"I'm sorry okay? I'm going to talk with Khalil and set things right I promise, but you have to stop treating me that way. It's killing me and Yvonne is just making things worse. I mean is it so hard to sit on her own and leave your arm alone, because it's kind of annoying " I said
"Okay, I'm sorry too" he answered and smiled at my comment about Yvonne touching his arm.
"Is what you have with her real or you only brought her to make me jealous?" I asked him
"What do you think?" he asked and sat beside me on the bed.
"I don't know, you tell me" I answered
"To make you jealous. You hurt me and I wanted to feel the same way. I'm sorry if that's petty, I was hurt" he said
"I understand. If you brought her to make me jealous does that mean you still love me? I asked
" I'd always love you Zee but you have to do something about Khalil. I hate seeing him with you" he answered
"I've heard you, I'll talk to him and you should talk to Yvonne too" I said
"I will" he replied
I moved closer to kiss him and he pulled me in his arms so fast and kissed me passionately.
We had lost track of time and everything seemed so calm outside. No one was talking and it freaked me out a bit so I hurried out he followed.
"What's wrong?" I asked as I read the facial expression on everyone's faces.
"Go to hell you piece of shit" Yvonne said before slapping Christopher and walking out on him with her already-packed bags. Apparently, instead of seven minutes, we were together for almost thirty minutes.
"I think you should talk to Khalil Zee" Amira said. I nodded and looked around for him but he wasn't there.
"He left" Amira said
"The two of you have hurt people who genuinely care about you because of your indecisiveness. I mean is it so hard to just admit you love each other and stop beating around the damn bushes. y'all straight people are weird man" Aya said
"I have to go" I said to Christopher before leaving to find Khalil. I tried so hard not to hurt him and that is exactly what I have done. I need to have a chat with him and be honest with myself about what and who I want.