Two years later
Madison~~
Loneliness is a strange sort of thing.
After this I'm going to be all alone. But it's okay because I've always been alone anyways.
I can't believe this is what my life has come to. Wow, the universe did me dirty. So is this how my story ends? Is this my fate? Hell, I never thought I'd end up here.
Maybe if I pray hard enough this will all disappear, all the pain and loneliness, it will right? Because please, I want it gone. But all I know is I'll never wish this on anyone. I wouldn't wish flameless love on anyone. This is not how things were supposed to be. Not to end up like loveless fools. Please help-
"Ms. Monroe?"
I open my tired dull eyes, look up at the Judge when I heard my maiden name.
"Please Madison, pay attention. We talked about this." Joe, my lawyer whispers next to me. He straightens his suit and buttons up his jacket.
I don't know why it's so hard for me to concentrate.
Judge Cheng continues. "Alright, let's discuss the finalization of shares among Ms Monroe and Mr. Hyde."
She pokes up her glasses and clears her throat. "House belongings: furniture and the house as a whole, as well as bank-"
"I don't want it." I say in a low toned voice.
"Excuse me?"
"I don't want any of it." I finally look Judge Cheng in the eye.
"If you let me finish then you'd know what I was about to say next Ms Monroe." She warns. I shut my mouth and let her finish. "Mr. Hyde is offering you thirty-five grand for the white Mercedes ML 7G Tronic." She says in a mouth full. "So it's basically a family car?"
"Yes, your Honour, but we never got to use it. I've got my own vehicle." Christian confidently points out from across the room next to his lawyer- Brian.
Cheng questions him further. "Was something wrong with the car?"
Christian gives me a quick glance before looking at the middle-aged Korean woman. "No. Madison bought it for me as a birthday gift but we never used the family car because we don't have a family. So I sold it."
"Okay, that's it!" Subtle anger rise inside me, "Do you really have to bring that up? It doesn't matter anymore because it happened two years ago but you're still bringing it up-"
"Because I still care!" He yells. Brian tries calming him down.
I take a deep breath in, "You don't." I say calmly, "She's gone and she's not coming back."
Then a sudden realization comes down upon me.
We are never going to forgive ourselves for what happened. Maybe this is our punishment? Maybe this is how our story ends, and maybe we do deserve this pain because we didn't try, at least not hard enough.
"Please calm down... So are you willing to take the thirty-five thousand dollars Ms Monroe?"
Do I want it? I mean, I could use the money-
"I think this is a great opportunity." Joe tries talking some sense into me.
Fine.
"Yes, I'm willing to take it."
"Good." Now Judge Cheng faces Chris, "The house is under your name so you'll keep it, same goes for the furniture. If you're willing to give furniture to Ms Monroe then-"
"No, it's fine your Honour." I say hastily, slowly feeling suffocated in the big dull courtroom, even though here's only four people present and myself included. "Can we please finish up?"
"May I ask you both one last thing?" Chris and I merely nod at her. "I know you went through the process of everything with your lawyers but... Are you both sure about this?"
Everything went silent for a moment, and in the corner of my eye I saw Christian looking at me, like he was waiting for my answer. Was he?
But that didn't matter.
I knew what my answer was and even though I'm not that confident in my decision, but that's the thing about life, it made me lost and uncertain about many things. But without looking back at Christian and with the little strength left I say.
"Yes, I'm sure."
"Alright. And you Mr. Hyde?"
This time I couldn't help but look at him. His eyes were fixed on his shakey hands, with watery eyes he answers. "Yes, your Honour. I'm sure."
I didn't realise tears were silently running down my flushed cheeks until Joe passes me the divorce papers to sign it.
"It's going to be all better soon, okay?"
He calmly says.
I try wiping off my tears with the sleeve of my black cardigan. "Yeah, this is for the best."
But why do I feel like I'm making a mistake? Am I that scared of being alone?
After Christian signs the papers his lawyer hands them back to Judge Cheng. "I'll get all the documents finalized and then give them back to your lawyers."
She gives a small smile for the first time since I was here. Maybe trying to lighten up the gloomy mood?
"Case adjourned."
When the heavy wooden courtroom doors open the first person I see is Whitney.
"I thought I told you not to wait for me."
She flings her arms open, "Oh, come here." Her arms encircles me, as my face buries in her curly dark brown hair, "Are you okay?"
I gently let go of her grasp, "I'm fine."
"So...how'd it go?" She asks with a pained look on her face.
I fling my bag over my shoulder, take out my phone to look at the time, 4:13pm, I've been in there for three hours. "It went better than I expected."
She just nods. "You know I'm here for you right babe? I got you. Always."
A small smile plac itself on my dry lips.
"Yes, Whitney. I know." I took a look at her hair and gorgeous melanin skin, the self-made dress she wore fits her curves perfectly. "You look really pretty today." I said.
"Don't do that!"
I frown. "Do what? Can't I compliment my bestie?"
"Trying to change the conversation. If you don't want to talk about it I understand-"
"Madison?"
I turn around when I hear a familiar voice.
"Liz, hi." I greet Christian's sister.
Her high heels clicks against the tiled floor as she approaches me. "I guess we won't be going on shopping-sprees together anymore, huh?"
"I-i mean we can still-"
Liz interrupts me. "Listen, I just want you to know that..." Her voice becomes shakey, "I really thought of you as a sister. I really loved when we spent time together, you were my comfort when my ex left me," I let out a small chuckle. "I'm going to miss you sis."
In an instant I wrap my arms around her, "I'm going to miss you too Lizzy. Don't put this on your shoulders, this is between your brother and I."
"Okay. I should get going. Mom is not feeling well about this whole thing."
She gives me one last hug before walking back to my ex-husband and my ex-inlaws. They must be so disappointed in me, but I had to do what was right.
Hopefully they'll understand that Chris and I weren't meant for each other.
I feel a tug on my arm. "Wanna get out of here?" Whitney asks.
"Yes please."
We begin walking out of the building but right before we could exit Christian calls out for me.
"Madison, wait!"
As I turn around I almost bump into him.
He steps a few feet back. "Uhh, you're going to call me right?"
I nod. "Yeah, I'll contact you to come pack my things. Next week I'm moving in so it'll be before then."
"See you then."
He stares at me for a couple of seconds before walking away.
"He doesn't look so good." Whitney points out.
"But anyway, what do you want to do? Watch a Netflix series and eat some chocolate chip ice cream at my place? I'm sure the boys wouldn't mind." She asks wiggling her perfect arched eyebrows.
"Okay, but I get to choose the series."
"Of course babe." She says laughing.
...
"Are you sure it's supposed to look like this?"
"I really don't know." I say honestly. The vanity desk I bought at Ikea got delivered today, and now Whitney and I are trying to put it together... but it's not going so great.
"Ow, fuck!"
I turn around frantically and see Whitney crotched down on the floor hissing in pain,
"Are you okay? What happened?"
"I bumped my toe into its freaking dismembered body-part." She cries out pointing at the leg of the desk.
I chuckle. "You mean it's leg?"
"Yeah, it's leg! I'm telling you Maddie this vanity is scary, it will hurt you whenever you try to touch it."
I grab a pack of frozen peas from the freezer and pass it to her.
"Here."
She smiles, getting up from the floor and seats herself on the only couch I own.
"I think maybe we should take a break."
"Ya think?" She says dramatically wiping non-existent sweat off her forehead.
Hunched over the kitchen counter, I ask. "You hungry?"
"No, I'm good."
Great, because I have nothing in my refrigerator anyway. Only ramen in the cabinet.
I at least pour us some water to quench our thirst.
"What do you think of this place?" I refer to my one bedroom and bathroom, small kitchen and living room apartment. It's so tiny but fuck it, I don't care.
"I think it's alright for you. Like you don't need anything fancy after what happened. You just need to focus on yourself right now."
I take a seat next her on the couch. "Yeah, I just can't believe he actually gave me a bed."
"Yeah what was up with that by the way? He was acting all weird around you when he came to install it." Whitney questions.
"The bed was in the guest bedroom but we hardly had any guests over." I take a sip from my water. "He willingly gave it and I didn't want to be a hassle so I accepted it."
Whitney takes the pack frozen peas off her big toe and sets it on the small coffee table. "Well, that was very kind of him. Did he say anything about the place?"
I sigh, "Can we please talk about something else?" I ask, because for the last few months all I've spoken about was Christian and the divorce proceedings, and honestly I'm tired of it all.
"Right, sorry." She rests her head on my shoulder. "Well, I do have some great news but I didn't want to seem like a bitch for telling you at this moment."
"No, say." I encourage her to speak up.
She takes a breath in. "I'm going to Paris."
"Wait, huh?"
Whitney sits up and faces me. "I'm going to Paris for Paris fashion week." My mouth flings open, "I didn't want to tell you because-"
"Are you kidding me this is amazing!" I pull her in for a hug, "You always wanted this Whitney and it's finally happening for you. I'm so happy for you."
Whitney moved to New York from California in hopes of becoming a fashion designer and that dream has come true for her, and now this amazing opportunity is given to her.
She smiles wide enough to see her perfectly straight teeth. "Thank you Maddie. I can't wait."
"When are you leaving? And what about Jace and Will?"
"I'm leaving next week Friday but I'm only coming back in three months." My eyes go big. "I know, I'm sorry but I have to go. I have to do a couple designs still as I'm working for some brands. Jace is working and Will has school. I'm gonna miss my boys so much." I raise my eyebrows giving her a look. "Fine, I'll miss you too, but only because I'm being forced."
We laugh for a bit. "I'm going to miss you too."
"I would ask you to come with but-"
I shake my head. "No, it's okay. And besides I can't leave my mom here all alone for three months."
"Right." Whitney takes my hands in hers. "If something happens you tell me right away. If Christian is working on your ass you tell me. If you need to talk Maddie, you know I'm here. Got it?"
"Got it." I smile.
At least she has my back.
"Next thing you know when you come back you'll be speaking French." I chuckle.
"You mean, wee wee pee pee?" I burst out laughing. "Bonjour wee wee. Can I have some pee pee?"
I couldn't stop laughing at her French impression. "Oh God, please stop."
"Wee wee."