(WARNING THERE HAVE SELF-HARM IN THIS CHAPTER)
His heart trembles like a leaf that had been swung by the sudden wind. The sight of the shark's corpse and no sight of Riz whereabouts make him slightly fear of the possibility that could happen to her. Hikkun was not like Riz, he can't use any mana or cast any spell so he can't hold his breath that long in the water. He ran toward the corpse and begin to search if there was any clue on what just happened to it. To him, Riz can handle anything and yet he don't want to think the worst possibility that can make her...'No he can't...he must not think negative thought'. She can beat people who were even bigger than her. 'He really sure she able to handle this right?'. He always said to himself that Riz can handle it, but this time he felt that he shouldn't let her go alone. But he still ignores his gut feeling and let her go do whatever she wants. This sight, if something bad happen to her; it was his fault. Why he was so ignorant today of all day!
A long time ago.....
He remembers how he meet her, the past was still clear and it was in the back of his memories. The girl with short hair, her pink fluffy hair flutter with the gust of the spring wind. The cherry tree that was planted there was blooming at the White mansion. She had just gotten back from the camp, and It was his first time seeing her, after being separated from her. It was not the first time he meet her, the very moment he see her was when 'Master Evan' back from his last mission. A little girl was been held tightly and she was so thin that only her skin and bone can be seen. He peeks out the window and can see the white mansion garden clearly from there. He sees her standing there and meet with Lady Luska. She must be has become her new partner, Lady Luska has been having a difficult time since the loss of her husband and her baby. It was really a pity, but since she came; there were improvements in Lady Luska's appearance. She smiled a lot and was more like a person than before. Her eye was more alive and there was a glimpse of hope in it. She was always eager to see Riz again. She had been waiting for the day she get back from the camp. She even asks Dad to make her favourite cake just to serve to Riz.
To him, the sight of seeing everything in this mansion was nothing at all. He know almost everything that happen, to him all of this was in the back of his palm. He still looks at her and without notice, the corner of his lips was up and he smiled at the sight of Riz and Luska playing. She makes Lady Luska feel young. 'I'm glad' He take a deep breath as he was about to turn around a voice came from behind him. "That's a rare sight…." He look toward the voice and saw his little brother Alice who was back from his mission walking toward him while was still covered with blood. Alice walk neared him and try to look at what he was smiling for. "Is that Luska and The new girl? Man...(chuckle) she really one ugly girl!" he continued laughing. Hikkun that time din't like his brother attitude at all, his brother was an arrogant person and always think he was better than him just because he has mana and can use magic. "You always said that, because you were jealous of her getting near with Lady Luska" he look at his brother that seem shock by his sudden act. "Hey Hikari don't you dare to pick a fight with me!" He stare Hikkun with his eye still shown his beast form. Alice that time never would imagine his brother who don't care about other, dare to provoke him just because he was laughing at that pink hair girl named Riz.
"Tch! Whatever.. .Just for you know Luska adore me more and that girl won't ever won her heart!" He walk away without even betting his eye on Hikkun who was still standing there with his hand been grip tightly contained the anger within his heart. Yet he can't do anything he still care his brother even he hate him.
Day turn into a month and month turns into a year. He growing up with her together in this mansion, Time past and Riz who use to be so skinny as bone was able to grown up and became a beautiful young lady. Like those rose that was grown in darkness, she able to become such elegant young lady within those year. She been working as Lady Luska partner, After she graduate from the camp; she have been working under Lady luska wing and she manage to became a most respectful person in the White mansion . Sometime when he pass by the window, he can see his brother talk with her and then they will fight over Lady Luska. Despite their bickering , to him; he see that the both of them have a rather good relationship. This cause him to be feeling unhappy with it. He would visit her sometime to have a conversation, He would pretended that all of their encounter was just pure of luck. Example, when she was resting from her pervious mission, he will bring a tea and said he was drinking there and it was just her luck to join him on his tea break. He really enjoy her company and attitude, she was sweet and a bit hot headed but still; she have her own unique way that let people felt approachable and care of other.
Until one day….
After the tragedy, Riz was given a task to reinforcement the enemy hide out with his brother Alice. That time Luska no longer there….
After several day has pass a sudden news came with a grand theatre been shown to us in White mansion.
Riz went back from her mission with his brother. The sight of seeing her in bloody state was horrifying and can't be describe by her condition that time. Hikkun who was at that time in the medical unite in white mansion was task to ensure the health of all of the family member was in good condition. If there state of emergency such as critical wound from the mission they did he will be the doctor that treated them. Usually, Riz will back from her mission with only a scratch but this time she almost lost her soul there.
After treated Riz, he look at the pale young woman that was lay on the bed. Her face was full with bruised and the scar was from her hips till her chest. He have to apply many gauze and put some pressure to ensure her wound would not open after the suture that he done. He really hate to see her in this state. He wish he has mana like her brother but he was nothing. If it his smart and creativity on creating new thing he can do it but when it came with strength and power he was nothing.
He walk out from her room and walk toward the garden. The moon was out and shine the darkness. The rock path that lead to a certain bench, can be seen and there a slightly lump of body that was in grief was sobbing there. He neared it and call it name…..
"Alice… why you alone, here?"
His brother was crying and to him it was a rare sight for Alice to be like this. He not a loving brother, he was not very talkative person and was not very good at showing his affection. "Hikari…Do you think; I deserve to be loved by someone?" It the first time he heard his brother to talk about feelings and love. His arrogant brother who seem to be a ego person suddenly talk about feeling and love. It really unexpected. "Why do you ask? Everyone, deserve to be loved even you Alice" He seem like not care about his brother but that was not true at all, at the same time he actually curious of this sudden talk.
His brother at that time weren't he usually self, very different It was very refreshing to see his brother in this situation. "You know I always like Luska right?" Alice said as he try to hold his tear. 'What? Since when!' he was mad, when hearing that. "Yes?" He answered it, but more to questioned it back to Alice. "Today… When I was on mission. I…I never felt scared about losing anything." He seem out of breath just saying those word, ;Did something terrible happen today that make Riz in this situation on their mission?;. That was the first question he want to ask but, he have to wait until it was a good time to ask back Alice.
Alice eye that fill with void hold his tear and turn to look at Hikkun with a slightly creepy smile.
"I think….I love Riz." The sudden confession of his brother about his true feeling of the girl he has been looking at, was shattered. He just clinch his teeth and bare his fang in his mouth. There a taste of blood sipping into his throat and the taste of it was been blind with madness. A glass that resonance with the air can be heard ringing inside his head after hear those word that came from his brother mouth. " I never felt like this...what should I do brother" He look at him and was asking his opinion on is his feeling was true or wrong.
"You….."
Three year after that.....
It was a raining day, a sudden pour rain just drop from the sky. Many people wearing black suit were leaving one by one, walking out already from the cemetery except a young woman who was now standing alone wearing a black dress that cover her body, her hand did not even carry an umbrella. Not even care about herself was soaking wet from the rain. She look at the cold tombstone that was lifeless and a tear can be seen from her eye was leaking, it went down to her cheek as she let it hit the ground. The rain mixes with her tear can hide the sadness that she bare of losing her love one and what make it worst the rain did not help her cover her sadness at all. The tear can be mix with the rain but the feeling can be seen, it don't needed anything else to understand her emotional right now. Hikkun who decide to stay with her came closer, while holding the umbrella to cover the young woman.
"Hikkun…Why does everyone, I love leave me?" She spoke with a soft and yet tremble heartbroken voice.
"I'm, not so sure Riz…." He look toward the tombstone his eye didn't avoid from stare at the cold wet stone that was in the rain and what was writhed there was.
'THE BELOVED AND HEROIC PERSON THAT EVER LIFE'
Under it, written the name 'ALICE'
It was his own brother funeral that day and yet he did not even shed a single tear and cry for him. Other that came crying and even said their last goodbye to his brother, even Riz who always fight with him was sad. Still yet, he who share blood with him; didn't shed any tear. He was actually happy that his brother now gone. He don't know why but he was really glad he died. He peeks at her, who was still sobbing. Her complexion was became even worsen by the time they spend there and he hate to see her condition like this. He has a mix feeling of himself, it hard to describe the feeling that time. He felt like the worst person to be rejoice by the sight that his brother no longer there. At the same time he glad the nuisance brother of his no longer there to interrupted him and cast his life in front of him, that make him a living shadow for Alice.
He drop the umbrella, that cause Riz to look at him. A sudden movement from him make Riz shock by his action. He decide to hug her…..and that lead her to hug him back for the comfort, since to her this what she needed the most right now.
After that, He asks Evan to switch him from being the medical unite to becoming Riz partner to do on mission. Then he gain those approvals; which he never excepted led he and Riz working together. He have been on missions with her as for long as he can remember. He understand her and that what make them a good team. Still due to the loss of both Luska and Alice, without Riz know she develop a syndrome which let her have an illusion of seeing death people and was consistent on killing herself. He use his knowledge on medical and science to help her, by ease her burden with certain medicine he develop to lost her memories. The medicine have a effect that cause her having a headache and loss some motivation to do work. The medicine cause her brain neuron to develop a certain lock toward what she don't want to remember but, he was sure it was the right decision for her.
The medicine act as a relief pain and also let the consumer into high ecstasy cause her to see what is not even truth became real. He always afraid that one day if she decide to stop eating it and that can cause a withdrawal symptoms as well let her to kill herself. But she been eating it and said she trusted him.
He love her and yet he felt like he can't have her…. He might tainted her with his dirty hand.
When she decide to become a territory leader, Hikkun decide to follow her as well since to him, it was his job to ensure her safety. He been working hard this past year to ensure nothing happen to her. He love her and yet decided to keep it in his heart. Unable to said does simple word. Trapped inside the embassy of lies he swallow his pride and stay by her side. She was the star of his life and the real reason of him to alive is her. That why if anything happens to her, he really blaming himself for this.
"Dear god, Whatever you do bring her back to me... safely please...I beg you…."
"please....."