I blink rapidly probably in an attempt to blur and get rid of this scammer type of guy presented in front of me.
He snaps his fingers in my face causing me to blink on beat.
"Fuck wrong wid yuh?" His lips draw into a snarl.
I pull my head back in shock.
"Huh?"
He takes a deep sigh and grabs my shoulder to pull me to my feet. He stands behind me and directs me with his hand still on my shoulder.
He guides me all the way back to his car and opens the passenger door.
He releases my shoulder and uses the same hand to point at the door.
"Lock it bloodclaat. Fuck wrong wid yuh?" He turns to look at me.
I look to the sky and laugh- like genuinely laugh. The alcohol is leaving my system a little. I know that I would have to pee to actually release the necessary amount before I take a shower and go to bed as my after party routine. So my laugh is only barely influenced by the alcohol.
My laugh is mostly me genuinely wondering what the actual fuck is wrong with this man.
Once I stop laughing I look over to him in disbelief. His eyes are low as he watches me.
"Lock e fuckin door and don' fuck yuhself wid mi."
Oh.
He is being dead serious.
"No.." My voice trails off.
"No?" He takes two quick steps forward so he is right over my shoulder. "Dweet." he spits.
I shrug him off and kiss my teeth then start walking back to my wall to sit.
I can hear him walking behind me as his feet crunched the gravel. It doesn't matter to me though. I keep a steady pace and hold my head straight.
"Hello?" He calls behind me.
I keep walking as if I don't hear him.
"Hello?" He snaps as he finally catches up to me.
He grabs my shoulder to spin me around to face him. "You are very rude."
I almost laugh at his audacity. Just before I decide to actually be very rude to him I see Jordan.
"Jade! We came out to look if y'all were okay." He smiles at me then winks.
Weird.
"I am fine." I huff.
The annoying choppa walks away in a defeated manner. All of a sudden, his crown pulls up beside us almost running over my foot if I hadn't jumped back out of the way.
"Later enuh dawg." He speaks in the direction of Jordan completely ignoring my existence.
His friends from earlier jump into the back of the vehicle and he speeds off throwing bits of gravel all over me- spitefully I would assume.
As soon as the car drives off I see Jordan walking back towards the club.
"Where are you going?" He turns back around almost immediately before shrugging.
"Back to the party."
"Oh, I thought you guys finished partying. I wanted to go home." It might've sounded selfish coming from me but I couldn't care less right now.
"No..." His voice trails off. "Why yuh neva ask di dawg fi gi yuh a drop home?"
I roll my eyes at my best friend. "No, thanks." He knows me too well to suggest that.
"Wah mek?" He looks genuinely confused. "Him neva deal wid e ting good?" he laughs a little.
I am not laughing.
I groan. "Him neva 'deal wid' a ting for it to be good or not. I don't know how you and that dutty foot bwoy are friends."
"Suh unnu neva do nothing?" He asks to clarify once more.
For some reason it always surprises me when men ignore what I say even though it is very common.
That's one of the many reasons I hate them.
I kiss my teeth. "No. Fuck mi look like a mek yuh dutty foot friend dig mi out?"
I take out my phone in annoyance to call my other best friend that is like my sister to see if she could give me a ride home.
I dial her number as Jordan went on and on about how great of a guy that Crown driver is and how loyal his friends are.
I release a breath of relief when she picks up the phone.
"Hey, babe." I acknowledge her.
"Hey, baby. What's up? I thought you was out partying like at the club."
I sigh in response. "I am. I need to get home though and was wondering if you could gimme a drive."
"Of course." I hear her shuffling around. "Just stay on the phone with me until I get in my car."
So said, so done. Before I knew it, my amazing best friend pulls up right in front of me while Jordan waits right by my side.
"Bye, Jordan." I give him a small hug that he returns.
Alexia, my other best friend, doesn't acknowledge him. She doesn't even bring her window down, as always.
I walk over to the passenger side and take a seat as Jordan walks back to the club.
"Ugh. Can't stand that nigga." Alexia mumbles to herself as she shuffles through her music trying to find the perfect song to put on while she drives.
I met Alexia when I just started high school, so seventh grade. We have been through so much together that we consider each other as sisters and even though it's foreign style to basically be sisters to the point where we can just go to each other's houses and sleepover, that's how we lived with our parents.
Alexia was always a bit jealous of Jordan since I knew him first. When she found out that we both have 'J' names because our mothers had planned this life for us before birth, she was incredibly jealous and only wanted people to call her by her middle name, Jade-Ann, because it looks even better than Jade and Jordan.
Once the hormones began to kick in though, she developed a crush on Jordan and they even started dating. That was a dream come true for me because now two of my favourite people were dating.
That turned sour after about two years when they both decided that they were too toxic for each other. Unfortunately, I've never gotten the full details- the nitty gritty of what actually went down. I just know that Alexia has hated him since and Jordan says he has no problem with her but he's always visibly uncomfortable when she's even mentioned.
"How was the club?" She turns to me with a smile as she pulls out of the club parking lot after selecting a song.
1Uptown by Bayka.
"It was alright. Mostly a blur."
"What did you have to drink?" She relaxes in her seat.
"Appleton Estate."
She smiles. Not a genuine smile- a taunting one.
"Jordan cheap nuh fuck. Every weh a Appleton, Appleton, Appleton." She laughs but mostly to herself.
"Bruk bomboclaat choppa."
I laugh- a genuine laugh but not because I agree. Just because it was funny to me but I like Appleton.
"Girl next weekend we can go to a club and drink sumn wid likkle class." She takes a draw of her spliff as we come to the red light.
"Fuck Jordan feel like? Wi can even meet some man. Money man." She laughs.
"Girl as yuh seh dat- Me? Have a story fi tell you."
"Girl a wah? Yuh meet a money man?" She fully turns her head to me in the seat.
I kiss my teeth. "Money man?" I emphasize both words. "A dutty foot man."
Sometimes I wonder if it's because she's always smoking but I genuinely love Alexia's company.
"And wah gwaan?" She giggles.
"I don't even remember, girl. All mi memba seh is mi end up inna him front seat and him a feel mi up." I inform her.
"Front seat?" She takes another pull. "Wah di killa drive? Mark x or Axio?"
"Crown."
"A lie?" She drags out the word lie as a smile spreads across her face. "Suh unnu jus feel up and dats all?"
"Haffi." I let out a small laugh. "Him rude nuh fuck."
Alexia rolls her eyes. "Yes. Leave it to Jordan fi have a rude, choppa type as a friend."
"Well here we are." She turned off the car as we both gathered our stuff and went inside her house. I was immediately greeted by her dog, Butter.
Butter was a small, crusty, ratty, white dog but we all love him. Alexia got Butter after my dog, Mimi, had her first set of puppies.
"Hey, Butter." I stoop down to pet him and rub his head.
We walk to Alexia's room but I go straight to the shower while she turns on her speaker to play some music.
Once I finish showering I go back to her room to put on some clothes and happy to see that she brought some snacks. Pizzas, gummies, doughnuts and of course an unopened bottle of Pure White Hennessy.
I smile to myself at the thoughtfulness of my best friend and pull on one of her t-shirts or maybe even a guy's t-shirt and a pair of underpants that also probably belonged to a guy but are now hers.
I sit on the floor and begin to pour some of the liquor with one of the chasers she had and grab a slice of pizza.
When I move on to my second slice of pizza and probably my third cup which as always is mostly liquor Alexia opens the bedroom door and grabs a slice for herself and held it in her mouth while she begins to roll a spliff.
"I don't know how yuh nuh smoke tho, Jade."
I turn to look at her then shrugged my shoulders. "Nuh my style."
She laughed. "Dat mi did seh too but jah jah..." She trails off. "From me start? Mi cyaah stop. Other than you this a my best friend and nothing more or less."
She sits in front of me building her second spliff since she came inside with red eyes.
"Suh wah yah seh? Yuh wouldn' do di dirt wid Jordan frien?" She asks me with a smile.
"Who? Mr. Dutty foot?"
"Nothing nuh wrong wid dem girl. Dem sweet enuh especially when yah dem girl- like dem personal ooman."
I ignore her and go on the bed and pull the blanket over me to feel cozy under her blazing air conditioning.
She laughs to herself then gets up to come lie down beside me.
"Girl mi a laugh but a true. Right now mi gyal- although mi love yuh, mi wish mine did deh here suh beside me right now." She laughs once more.