Chapter 17 - Isamu Winter: Weakness

Ever since that fateful day, I've been training using a real sword and sparring with Father, and I've gotten stronger, as well as perfecting my magic control with mother...

I thought I would be better than I once was, but... It would seem that it still wasn't enough.

There is one more difference between the age groups in the tournament besides the magic ruling. While the younger children fight with dull swords incapable of breaking the skin. The older kids were allowed to use sharpened swords.

I stood in the middle of the colosseum before my opponent breathing heavily with cuts and bruises along with blood and sweat dripping from my face and arms.

The strength to keep fighting was beginning to fade, I can't even muster up the mana to use any of my water magic. But regardless, I must win.

My father watches from the stands, I can't disappoint him. Not again.

Thrusting my sword with barely any strength in my swing, letting out a battle cry.

However, I am overpowered no matter what I do. Sending me down to one knee, the arrogant swordsman stands looking down at me with a cocky smirk, as I struggle to stand back up.

In the rules for the tournament, the only way to lose is either getting your sword knocked out of your hands or falling to the ground.

He's deliberately abusing me, but exploiting the rules and making sure that I don't lose by way of falling to the floor. Even the Proctor is disgusted with this act of abuse but knowing that it's not exactly against the rules, he can't do anything about it.

It's clear that his main goal is to break my spirit.

"How can you call yourself a swordsman? I see no honor in you."

"Honor you say, I don't need honor when power is what runs the world." He proclaims.

Before I can make another move, my feet become frozen in place, making me unable to move. As much of a jerk as he is, his ice magic is seriously strong.

"Oh, cut it out already you weakling. I'm not a fan of bullying those weaker than me, so why don't you just give up, Mr. Winter?"

"Really? Because you look like you're having a blast. I'll stop when I'm on my ass and I'm looking at the sky."

Using the rest of the strength I could muster; I break free from his ice.

"But why? You are so obviously outclassed, why do you even bother?"

"Because I promised my mother and my father that I will become strong."

"Oh, how touching, but don't you think you're only disappointing them with this pathetic state that you're in? I mean just look at yourself."

"No, if you think I'll be done in by a coward like you. Then think again... Now stop playing around, and fight me, Valdis."

Before I could even react, a sword aimed right at my lungs came charging in. Blown back by the piercing pain in my chest, the precautionary barrier magic ensured the protection of my organs, but it still felt like a gut-wrenching punch.

With the air knocked out of me, I could no longer breathe properly or even stand straight and before I knew it, I was on my back.

"Isamu Winter has fallen!... Valdis Gideon is the winner!"

The arrogant winner, with the same cocky smile, was now holding his sword to my face, "Awww. Damn it, I wanted to play with you a little longer, but it seems I let my emotions get the better of me..."

His manner of speech quickly changed and is now staring daggers at me. "Don't say my name so casually, fool."

Getting one last look at the ugly person who beat me I prominently blacked out.

...

Becoming stronger and protecting my family, was what I always wanted ever since my affinity awakened.

Watching Father walk out of the house with a smile and come back with that same smile, made me want to become like him more than anything.

He's strong. He's humble. He is my hero.

So I pushed myself. Physically training til I dropped from exhaustion. Practicing my magic control until I ran out of mana.

I thought I was ready. Until I realized that... I was scared of dying. I was naive to think hunting was just another sport when in reality it's a fight for survival.

And after coming close to death with that sabered black tiger, and finding out that Touma aided greatly in its demise while I was unconscious. I was frustrated. Not at Touma but at myself for being a coward, making me train even harder.

He quickly exceeded and surpassed me way before I even realized it, going even further. Was I slacking off? No... he was just like Akio. Prodigies born under the same roof.

Then there's me. The son that was born with only one affinity.

Pushing for a goal that I may never reach, until I eventually fill the whole cup and can learn nothing more.

...

Where am I, it's quiet, I open my eyes to the ceiling above me. My father and mother were by my side. I sit up and inspect my arms not finding any cuts or bruises anymore.

"Where am I?" I ask.

"In the infirmary. The healer for the tournament spent the last thirty minutes healing all your wounds. There's not a scratch on you now." Father informs me.

"And my lungs?" I ask.

"The precautionary barrier magic, set by the officials, took the brunt of the impact so healing it wasn't a problem."

"I see..."

"How did Touma fare in his battle, mother?"

"He won his first battle." She responds.

"Where is he now?"

"Preparing for the next one."

"I see..."

Silence filled the room for a brief moment.

Clenching the covers, feeling the lump in the back of my throat as my eyes welled up with tears and my vision became blurry.

"Listen Isamu..." Father begins speaking.

"No, it's okay, Father... I realize it now... I'm not cut out to be an adventurer."

"Isamu..." Mother cuts in.

"No, mother, please don't... You already saw, Father. I was no match for him..."

"He just... laughed at me while beating me around like I was a ragdoll. And cut me up without any struggle..."

The pain and frustration built up inside me, as I grit my teeth and my muscles become tenser...

"I'M SO WEAK!!! why did I even bother trying to become an adventurer in the first place!?"

"I was only born with one affinity why did I think I could make it?!"

"Father is strong!"

"Mother is strong!"

"Akio is strong!"

"Even my little brother is stronger than me...!"

"...WHY COULDN'T I JUST BE LIKE YOU FATHER!!"

"Listen Isamu!" My father shouts, gripping my shoulders tightly.

"You aren't weak..."

"Yes, I am..." I reluctantly say.

"No... You're only weak if you stay down..."

"But I wasn't strong enough to beat that guy. So what's the point?"

"Strength isn't about how much you can beat the other guy. It's about how much you can face and overcome."

"When you were attacked by that beast, did you stop wanting to become an adventurer?"

"I wanted to, but..."

"You didn't, right? Seeing Touma exceed didn't make you want to quit. No, it made you want to go even further."

"Even now... That other kid might've been strong, but did you back down...?"

"No..." I answer.

"That's right... You held your head high and gripped your sword with great resolve, and kept pushing forward with bravery..."

"The strength of your spirit that burns inside of your heart never once faltered..."

"But, I can't be fearless like you. You fight monsters almost every day, and you always come back with a smile."

"You're mistaken, Isamu... I put on a smile because the last thing I want to do is make my family worry... I'm afraid of death just as much as you... But it's my job to protect those that can't protect themselves and the ones I care about."

"You don't have to try and be like me, son..."

"...Because you are already stronger than I am."

Tears flowed out of my eyes without stopping as I collapsed into his chest. A huge weight seemed to be lifted off of my shoulders as my mother and father held me. Until the tears finally stopped.

"...Are you feeling better?" Father asks.

"Yes..."

"Then let's go watch your brother."

"...Okay."