(My carpal tunnel is flaring up, so I will be taking some extra time to finish writing a chap, so the upload won't be consistent for two weeks. )
[General POV]
"Which song shall we hear first? Enemy? Natural? Or Whatever it takes-"
"Just play the first one." Claire rolled her eyes at Phil's questions as she couldn't wait any longer.
"So…Which one?" Phil asked carefully, in which Claire threw her head back and gestured in frustration before calming down and said, "Whatever it takes."
"Sure." Phil replied.
While Phil and Claire were arguing , the siblings were having a conversation on their own.
"A second singles release isn't normal right? I'm not crazy?" Haley asked in a puzzled tone as she thought about the matter.
Alex replied, "No. You're not crazy. He's very brave to have launched this. But none of it is free, so I guess it doesn't matter much."
"But people can pirate it and stream it online for free." Haley added again in a concerned tone. "Won't that just make him earn less?.
"Yeah. Sure. But for some reason, none of Ed's interviews or songs are able to be pirated and posted online." Alex explained. She saw that Haley was still confused, so she clarified, "That's a good thing."
"OOo…" Haley exclaimed before turning her attention to the laptop. Before Phil could finally press play, she asked, "Hey dad. Wouldn't it be better if we hear it with speakers-"
"That's a great idea Haley! I'll be right back! Luke! To the garage!" Phil stopped his finger and stood up abruptly from the chair before running out of the kitchen to get his speakers. Claire was flabbergasted and looked at Haley with an expression as if she's asking, 'Seriously?'.
Haley could only shrug, and they both could hear Phil shout from afar, "And don't you guys dare to listen to it first without me!"
In another part of the country, a certain teenage pop star was also waiting for the new singles release.
"I'm soo excited! He didn't even give me a preview of the songs before it came out! That jerk!" Taylor complained to her makeup staff as she waited backstage of her concert venue.
But as she wore her headphones, her assistant barged into the room and complained angrily, "Taylor! What are you doing!? You need to get onstage in another 15 minutes! Do you think that you still have time to listen to the songs?!"
Taylor stared at the assistant and replied casually, "Yeah. 15 minutes. The whole three songs don't even reach 12 minutes. I have 3 minutes to spare to get ready after."
"But-"
"The more you disturb me, the longer it will take for me to finish listening to them and I'm not moving until I do." She said in a sing-songy tone.
"Urgh!" The assistant grunted and stampeded off as she couldn't deal with Taylor's shenanigans any further.
"Tsk Tsk Tsk. I really should change my agency." Taylor clicked her tongue and muttered as she pressed play on the first song.
[Whatever it Takes- Imagine Dragon]
♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪
"♫♪Falling too fast to prepare for this
Tripping in the world could be dangerous
Everybody circling, it's vulturous
Negative, nepotist ♫♪"
"Oh. I thought it's going to be a romantic song." Taylor muttered incomprehensibly, not hiding the fact that she was wishing for Ed to make another song for her. Although a bit disappointed, she continued to listen to the song.
In the Dunphy's house, as Claire heard the lyrics, she widened her eyes and smacked Phil's shoulders repeatedly to gain his attention.
"Owww! What?" Phil exclaimed in pain before glancing at Claire who was standing behind him.
"The book."
"What book- OOOOHHHH… The book. Seriously?"" He squinted his eyes in disbelief as he asked. Claire nodded repeatedly and before she could talk, Luke put his index finger on his lips and shushed them.
"I wanna hear the song, not you guys talking. Have some respect for Edward." Luke admonished them.
"Oh-Okay. Sorry." Claire was baffled, not knowing how big of a fan he was, and shut her mouth for the whole song after that.
While Claire was talking to Phil, Alex and Haley fell into a daze as they listened to the song. It was as if they could see Edward who was wearing his classical music suit stood up in front of the stage, fighting the jeering of the competitors as he played his songs.
"♫♪Everybody waiting for the fall of man
Everybody praying for the end of times
Everybody hoping they could be the one
I was born to run, I was born for this♫♪"
In a mansion somewhere in Hollywood, RDJ took off his glasses and leaned forward in his chair from a relaxed position as he heard the song. His wife Susan was beside him, having some tears in her eyes.
"This is a song for me right?" RDJ asked cockily, but he quickly controlled himself as his wife glared at him.
♫♪Whip, whip
Run me like a racehorse
Pull me like a ripcord
Break me down and build me up
I wanna be the slip, slip
Word upon your lip, lip
Letter that you rip, rip
Break me down and build me up
Whatever it takes♫♪
Ted sighed as he heard the song. He turned around to look at his son, only to find him gone.
"Where did he go?" Ted asked the surrounding crew members who were listening to the songs with him. They shrugged as they had no idea where Edward had gone. Dwayne replied, "He's in the toilet."
"Ahh..Okay."
"Hey, although the whole melody raises up your spirit, don't you think the lyrics are a bit sad?" Dylan asked suddenly.
♫♪'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins
I do whatever it takes♫♪
"It must be your imagination." Dwayne replied to Dylan.
♫♪'Cause I love how it feels when I break the chains
Whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪Yeah, take me to the top I'm ready for
Whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins
I do what it takes♫♪
"Hmm…Why do I feel so choked up?" Selena asked in a perplexed tone while wiping her tears as she heard the songs in her apartment bedroom.
♫♪Always had a fear of being typical
Looking at my body feeling miserable
Always hanging on to the visual
I wanna be invisible♫♪
Eminem showed Dr Dre the song, and Dre commented, "I know he's rhyming. But it ain't rapping, although it is quite similar and I can totally see it certainly does fuse hip hop vibes."
♫♪Looking at my years like a martyrdom
Everybody needs to be a part of 'em
Never be enough, I'm the prodigal son
I was born to run, I was born for this♫♪
"His years felt like an ordeal he had to go through. A life where he always had to meet others' expectations of him. And since he was burdened by his ability since he was young, he thought that's all he was good for. I think I have what I need now for his next therapy session." Dr Linda Martin said as she jotted down her thoughts in her notebook.
♫♪Whip, whip
Run me like a racehorse
Pull me like a ripcord
Break me down and build me up
I wanna be the slip, slip
Word upon your lip, lip
Letter that you rip, rip
Break me down and build me up
Whatever it takes♫♪
"A puppet." Alex exclaimed suddenly. Haley widened her eyes and it became red instantly as she finally understood what Edward was conveying in the chorus.
♫♪'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins
I do whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪'Cause I love how it feels when I break the chains
Whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪Yeah, take me to the top, I'm ready for
Whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins
I do what it takes♫♪
Most of the fans who were listening to the songs didn't feel what the people who were close to Ed felt.
"Oh my god. This song makes me think that it's possible for me to do anything!"
"It already climbed into the top 10 songs, and it had just been released!"
"Ahhh I really need to get tickets to Edward's concert!! RIGHT NOW!"
In a mansion in Cuba, a woman in a floral dress was listening to the songs with an incomprehensible expression on her face. The bedroom she was staying in was filled with trash and empty alcohol bottles.
"Hermana, ¿No crees que es hora de que regreses? (Sister, don't you think it's time for you to go back?)" Edward's Aunt Camila asked in a careful tone.
"Camila…I…I can't go back." Miranda– Edward's mother said in a choked up voice. "I could never go back now."
(Eve Mendes- Edward's mother look-alike)
♫♪Hypocritical, egotistical
Don't wanna be the parenthetical, hypothetical♫♪
"(Sigh) Okay." Camila sighed.
"But…you should go there…and take care of him for me." Miranda requested with a teary face as she turned to her adopted sister.
♫♪Working onto something that I'm proud of, out of the box
An epoxy to the world and the vision we've lost♫♪
"Good for him. Otherwise, we would never have met Edward the singer." Elsa said casually as she rolled around on Jenna's bed. Jenna glared at her and said, "Shut up if you don't understand anything!"
♫♪I'm an apostrophe
I'm just a symbol to remind you that there's more to see♫♪
♫♪I'm just a product of the system, a catastrophe
And yet a masterpiece, and yet I'm half-diseased♫♪
"That's…exactly what he is." Mitchell muttered.
♫♪And when I am deceased
At least I go down to the grave and die happily
Leave the body and my soul to be a part of thee♫♪
Claire squinted her eyes and asked in a concerned tone, "Did he just say when he's deceased?"
(♫♪Underwater sound♫♪)
"Oh my god. Why are there underwater sounds? " Cam asked in a dramatic manner.
Despite not playing along to Cam's freak out, Mitchell was also feeling uncomfortable when he heard it.
"Is he telling us…he's drowning?" Mitchell hypothesized.
♫♪Whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins
I do whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪'Cause I love how it feels when I break the chains
Whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪Yeah, take me to the top, I'm ready for
Whatever it takes♫♪
♫♪'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins
I do what it takes♫♪
As the song ends, other than the fans who were absolutely loving the song, people like Cam, Claire, Phil, and Ted were having mixed feelings about it. Pepper had already listened to the songs before, so he just sighed and said, "I can't believe he took such a painful past, and packaged it into a top 10 song."
Renaldo who's standing next to Pepper nodded despite not knowing anything about Ed's past, and said, "Well… Like Edward said… He doesn't care about exposing himself as long as he makes money from it."
"Hmm…Where is Ed now by the way?" Pepper asked as he felt the need to go there and give Edward a hug as he knew it would be a difficult time for him now.
"He's…at the pier with his dad." Renaldo answered.
"Well…if he's with his dad." Pepper said dismissively before going to handle a few more things for Edward's career.
In the Dunphy's house, Claire asked, "Haley. Can you still call Ed now?"
"No mom. His phone is off again." Haley replied with a worried expression.
Taylor also wanted to call Edward, but it was futile. No one could contact Edward at this moment.
"What is wrong with him!?" Taylor grunted angrily as she tried to call him again for the 4th time.
In the Edward's website forum, Edward's loyal fan was having a field day with all 3 new songs. And the reaction for 'Whatever it takes' was especially positive.
LilyFanClubPresident : " ('Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins) This is what I felt when I was listening to the song. Goosebumps all over!"
TiaDalma: This song is soo inspiring! LOVE YOU EDWARD!
Pluto: Red bull should hire this guy. This song gives me more wings than the actual drink. Although, this may contribute from the fact that I might have a severe energy drink addiction and the drink doesn't affect me any longer. But still.
By an hour after the release, the song had climbed to number 7 of the Itunes chart.
…
[Edward POV]
"Blueekk!" I threw up my entire guts as I hugged the toilet bowl and kneeling on the dirty bathroom tiles. My eyes were teary, my nose runny, and drool was overflowing from my lips.
With a sniff, I tried to calm myself down and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand before sitting on the floor of the toilet.
"Ughh. I hate panic attacks." I said casually as I held my hurting stomach. "The worst part is, I'm very confused whether the panic attack is mine or the previous guy leftovers."
I really hated the way that my mind was hiding something away from me. The Afterlife Corporation told me that the previous Edward and the current me were the same guy– I just had unlocked the memory of my past life after I got that skateboard incident.
But the fact that my mind was keeping something away from me was very disconcerting. If I was truly the same guy, I should have access to ALL the memories from before. So I did the stupid thing by revealing the song the previous me had written and wanted to keep hidden his entire life as he wanted to become a classical musician.
"Like ripping off a band aid." I muttered in a self-deprecating manner. And like I thought, I did really get access to the traumatic memory by doing this.
"But the wound beneath had already festered." I muttered with some regret.
"Still…it certainly saved me a lot of time and money when measured against years of therapy before finally recognizing and facing my trauma."
As I rested my head on the stall walls, I suddenly heard a knock coming from outside the door.
"Ed. You have been here a long time. Are you okay?" Dad asked in a concerned voice.
"Yeah. I'm okay." I answered weakly.
"Are you sure? Cause I can see you're sitting on the floor." Dad asked again.
"..." I stayed silent for a while before I unlocked the door. Dad opened it and looked around with a worried expression before saying, "Hey Bud, what happened?"
"Ugh. Don't 'Hey Bud' me. I hate that." I said with a grimace. Dad helped me to unroll some tissue and helped me wipe off some dirtiness from my shirt.
"Are you okay? Do you need me to call Dr Linda?" He asked.
I waved my hand dismissively and said, "It's fine. I just need to calm down. In fact, I'm a whole lot better now compared to before."
And it was true.
Before, I didn't even know why I had such a resounding hate for my mother. But now, the memory of our last conversation together was finally opened up, albeit not fully.
'And don't get me wrong. The trauma wasn't because of the one conversation I had with that woman. It was from all of the collective trauma that I had faced from my early morning career, all compounded together with a statement from her.'
"Okay. I won't force you to talk." Dad said before he said, "Scoot over."
"What? Don't sit on the toilet floor. It's disgusting!" I tried to stop him, but he was stubborn and he sat next to me.
"I'm not going anywhere besides being there next to you."
I smiled at his words and we sat there silently as I processed my thoughts without a peep from my dad.
Flashback -
Mid July, Year 2006, at the final of the under 14 International Violin Composition Competition.
While wearing a small tuxedo, I was practicing my facial expression while holding a black wood violin in my hand where I saw my mother talking to a woman in a floral dress. I didn't hear what she was saying before, but she was arguing deeply with the woman.
"What else should you do? Just leave him and come back!" The woman in the floral dress said with a raised tone.
"I can't leave my son!" My mom argued back.
"This is for our country!"
"Mom. What's wrong?" I went to her and asked. My mom finally snapped out of it and the woman turned sideways and pulled her large hat to cover her face.
"Well honey. I…I don't think that I can stay for your competition." Mom said.
"But-But you promised-"
"Honey. It's not that big of a deal. You'll win anyway. You have a god given talent for this." Mom said before she left with the woman.
'God given talent?' The young me gritted my teeth as I thought in frustration. "So why the hell have I been practicing like a mad man if God has already given me everything I need?" I muttered angrily.
The tiredness from practicing, the pressure from having to perform well and deal with the critical crowd, the fake smiles I had to wear, all of it was too much to handle for the young me.
So when I went to the stage that day, I had my first ever panic attack, and fainted underneath the spotlight.
'What does it matter if I win? People will just hate me more if I win.'
My eyes darted on the stares of the audience, and I couldn't hear anything except a high pitched ringing tone in my ears. My mouth became dry, and my hands were shivering.
'Why didn't mom understand? I did it all to make her smile, but she isn't even here.'
I clutched my chest as I fell to my knees in front of the whole audience. I saw Dad was running towards me.
'Does she really love me? Or does she love being a mother of a prodigy?' I thought before I lost my consciousness.
I was taken to the hospital and didn't wake up for 3 days after the whole incident. I was just…so tired from everything at that time.
When I woke up later, I found out from my dad that my mother had already left our family. I blamed myself for the whole incident. I thought by fainting on the stage, I had failed my mother's expectation, and she didn't need me anymore.
-Flashback ends-
"So...Dad… When are you going to tell me?"
"Huh?" My dad who was sitting next to me was confused as I suddenly asked him a question. "Tell you about what?"
"The real reason mom left." I confronted him. He sighed and said, "Well…your mom had something to do in her country. That's all I can say for now."
"So…who came out with the lesbian thing?" I asked jokingly.
"That'll be your Uncle Aaron." Dad replied with a small chuckle.
I laughed together with him even though he was still keeping the real reason mom left away from me and we talked a lot about my childhood before he asked, "So. What are you going to do now?"
"Well…I don't know." I said while wiping my mouth. " Although I do know I need to burn my clothes now and take a bath. I do have a burning anger in my chest, so I might need to fight someone after this to let it all out."
"Do you…want to join a fight club?" Dad asked jokingly. I turned to him with a fake surprised expression and said, "Dad. You broke the rule."
He shook his head embarrassingly and said, "So I guess I need to turn in my membership after this."
I laughed and said, "Don't worry. I won't tell anyone you slipped up."
Dad nodded his head and patted my shoulder before he stood up first. He lent me a hand to get up and said, "Come on. I think you can borrow some of Dylan's clothes. He always falls into the sea so he keeps a few extra sets here."
"Cool." I grabbed my dad's hand and stood up with his help before we walked together to his office. There wasn't anyone there, so the matter today was only known to me and my dad.
'Maybe next time, I should really avoid doing dangerous things that could mess with my psyche. Should I really open up to Linda? Hmmm…That's a thought.'
"What are you thinking about now?" Dad asked after I finished changing.
"Nothing."
Dad nodded and we didn't return to the topic anymore. After a while, he asked, "Do you want to stay inside my ship tonight? I know you hate sleeping in the ship's cabin, but-"
"No no. None at all. In fact, I missed it." I replied instantly as I didn't want to deal with anything else and just wanted to rest my mind for a while. Dad led me to his Captain's cabin where I flopped onto the bed the moment I walked into it.
Without me realizing it, I had already fallen asleep before it was even 10 pm today, and I didn't even have to activate my [Rest] skill to do it. I didn't turn on my phone, nor did I check the reviews of the songs after it was uploaded. I didn't care about how many downloads I had, nor if people love the songs or not.
All I wanted right now, was to rest a bit.