ENYEOK
I stared at the doorknob for an inappropriate moment before I curled my fingers around it. With a deep breath, I dared to open the door and step into the apartment that I'd run out of hours ago. When I stared ahead, I saw Zelan's head peeking up from the living room couch where he lay on his stomach.
"Hey," Zelan says, a soft smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he sits up from the couch, eyes on me.
As my legs carried me farther toward him, I could see the tiny water droplets spattering from his wet locks while he pushed them back from his eyes as he made some space on the couch for me to sit down.
"Dad called me, " He says, his eyes finding mine as I sat beside him.
Of course, David would call him. I had expected that. I don't want to come back to stay here but when I think about what David said, I cannot refuse. I'm here for a reason. Zelan And I are gonna work together for a movie, and we really need to get along if we are really gonna do that.
"Yeah, I know he would." I say, my eyes training on the book that he left on the coffee table before us. It is a novel by Garam, which is gonna be a movie, the movie that we're gonna star in—One of my all-time favorite romances.
"And I can't accept that."
My eyes flickered back to him, a frown crawling on my face, "Can't accept what?"
He sighed, "Look, Enyeok. I don't really know why you would ever suggest something like that, really. You are staying here for a purpose. A part of work if you like to think that way. And I would not ever let you pay for staying here. I would not." His voice was stern and determined and every single word had a weight on them, leaving no room for me to object. So instead, I just stare into his eyes, from this close, it's prettier than they used to be. His thick lashes fluttered every time he blinked and his blue orbs always had a gleam in them. It draws me in and refuses to let go.
However, I managed to look away.
"Did you read that one?" Zelan asked after some moment of silence, he pointed at the book as if he noticed my eyes lingering on it for more than a few moments. It has a very pretty cover which will earn a second glance from pretty much everyone.
"I did. And I love it." I felt my lips curling in a smile as I held his gaze. He looks so handsome, it hurts. It hurts that I can only relish but never have a taste.
"I do too." He said, his hands reaching out to take the book in it, fingers absentmindedly caressing the cover as he smiles down at it.
I just stare at him, at the way his eyes shine in fascination as he stares at the book in his hands, "He is so creative, isn't he? I had always loved all of his books. But this one has a piece of my heart." A soft chuckle left his lips, "Maybe it's because of the way he wrote about my Dad in it. So romantic."
"He is. And their love always intrigued me." I said. His eyes flashed back to me and I wondered if it turned out dreamier than I intended it to be. I held my breath at the way he grinned down at me, soft and precious. No one has ever made my skin tingle with just a smile, but Zelan is an exception.
I avert my gaze from him to my feet because I don't want him to see that stupid smile on me and think I'm weird.
We sat there in silence for some moment, yet it wasn't suffocating as it was before. But it didn't last long, the ring of my phone broke the little bubble we were in. I pulled out my phone from my pocket and peeked at the screen. I felt my blood turning cold in my veins as I stared at the caller id. It was my Mom.
I wanted to take the call or maybe I wanted to cut it, but my fingers remained frozen to do either of them. I gulp, my eyes riding up to Zelan's.
"Take it," He persuaded.
I felt his hands on my shoulder, a gentle squeeze. The warmth of it fades away just as the ringing of my phone. But the cry of my phone came back soon enough but his touch didn't.
I excuse myself and practically run back to my room—the guest room. I locked the door and walked toward the window wall. As I stared at the city of Seoul sprawled across, it blinked its twinkling eyes back at me. The ringing of my phone fades away again only to chime louder.
Trying to restrain my fastening heartbeat, I drag my weary fingers down the screen, accepting the call.
"Where the heck was you? Didn't you hear your phone ringing? Or were you ignoring me intentionally?" My mother's irritated voice hit my ears unpleasantly, my nose scrunching in distaste. I heard the creak of the chair on the floor before she spoke again, "Can't you hear me?"
"I can, Just surprised that you bothered to even make a call." I said, eyes vaguely set on the glistening city.
"Just making sure you're still alive. Since I haven't heard from you for days." The way she says it made my heart clench just as it made my jaw. I don't know where that old sweet self of hers had gone, I haven't met that version of her since my teenage years.
"Now that you know that I am, can I hang up?" She chuckles, the sound of it made me grimace. And I remember a time I went all the way to make her laugh.
"Where are you?"
"Do you really care?" I ask. Really wishing to know the answer. Wanting her to care, even if it was a slight bit.
"Honestly? I don't." She says, her voice giving nothing to believe the other way. Even though she just said she doesn't care— even though they always make me feel like they don't care, I always bring myself to believe that it wasn't true. If they won't care about their own son, then who would they care about? I don't really know.
"Nothing new," I managed, feeling the back of my eyes burning. I'm tired of this shit.
"Where are you, though?" She asked again.
As much as I want to cut the call and sleep my headache off, I didn't do that. Because I care about her more than I let it show, "I'm at Zelan's."
I know she knows Zelan because he is all on Tv. She is a fan too, even though she tries hard to hide it, I can say that.
"What are you doing there?" She scoffs and I roll my eyes hard even though she can't see me.
"What do you expect me to do here?"
"I don't know, maybe, wasting your life by being a burden to someone else."
I clench my jaw, "For your information, I'm staying here because we need to get to know each other more before the shoot starts, not because I have nowhere else to go."
"Staying together to get to know each other? In what way though?" She scoffed. I felt my eyebrows crease at her words. What does she mean?
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I don't know if the actors will stay together to get closer before the shoot. New information."
"You should thank me"
She scoffs again, "So you are not changing your mind, huh?"
"Nothing's gonna change my mind"
The line went off.
The silence devours me.
And fresh tears clouded my vision.