London, April 2019
Maybe if she had not been so tired, the reaction would have been different. It felt nice to be desired off the camera, she thought lazily, replaying the evening. She was still in bed.
It had been a while that Monty and she had broken off as a couple. So, yesterday, when he had tried to kiss her, she had been surprised. Actually she had moved away sharply.
She had first met Monty when he came for lunch at Ashok da's house. After leaving the Banerjee's, she had moved in with Monty. They had drifted into a relationship, almost like an Indian arranged marriage. That was hilarious. An adult-movie star and her producer in an arranged marriage situation!
Then came Sonia, dew-fresh with her glowing mountain looks. Monty was drawn by the Nepalese beauty. In their profession that was something common. The new girls were sought after, till they were new no more. But why had that affected her?
She was still one of their best, if not the best. Her movies were hot in the Middle East. Her rates matched the best in the industry. Then why had she been angry and hurt when Monty went off with Sonia to an unknown destination. They had hired a new face to be the farm hand, the male role play. The series of videos, an outcome of the trip, were very mediocre. Everyone had said so. But Monty seemed to be fascinated with Sonia, showering her with praises, and good opportunities. And he started to ignore Pari.
Once back from the trip, Monty, looking happily self-conscious, had said, "It will be nice if you can get a place of your own."
Pari rolled over, still unwilling to leave the warmth of the covers; she picked up the mobile from the bed side table and checked her messages. There was a devil face from Chris. She started laughing. Poor Chris. She had given him serious trouble yesterday.
There were some texts in their family group. Photos ....who went where, with whom. Usual cousin stuff. Her contribution to this group was limited to the snaps she took of Wembley, nature shots, the stadium. She of course was the pride of the extended clan. The 'cousin' in London.
If only they knew. She shuddered to think what ammi, abbu, would go through, if they knew that she was not doing a diploma course in Journalism, as she had told them. What would Kajol and Shona say, if they knew that she was not charting the dream life that she had promised them. College in England.
No, she could not afford friends, she could not afford a social life that every young person, in every corner of the world had a right too.
She remembered that she had to call her mother.
"Han ammi, bolo," Pari spoke softly, thinking that Mita had picked up the call. "Ami Shona bolchi apu," she heard her sister's excited voice.
"What's up Shona? Your exams are over?" asked Pari. Shona would be in the sixth standard this year.
"Yes apu. And I have a surprise for you. Bolo tow ki?" Shona said, hardly able to contain her excitement.
"Shona, what is it? I cannot guess!" Pari said, catching Shona's excitement.
"I got the scholarship. The Barin Ghosh Scholarship!! Apu bhabte parcho? Can you imagine?" Shona seemed to be twirling in joy.
"Shona, I am so proud of you, so so proud of you," Pari answered, tears running down her cheeks.
Mita had come on the line and updated her with family gossip. When Pari asked about Ratan, Mita said that Ratan was suffering badly. Death had brought relief.
"I have to do it," Pari thought, brewing a cup of green tea, the first of the innumerable cups, that sustained her through the morning. After the call, she got out of bed, with a spring in her step. Shona's success seemed to have given her a shot in the arm. "I have to save and see their dreams come true," she told herself. Maybe more shifts, weekend assignments? Out of town house parties. Those paid more. Had their risks, but paid more. Whatever, whatever it takes to save up.
She had two to three years, before she was too old for this industry.
Ardapunia, April 2014
Pari loved her new dress. It was a pink salwar kameez with a lovely flower-printed duppata. The plan had been to buy two sets. But it was Kajol who said that they should get something thicker and ideally not in cotton, to suit her requirement for London. They decided to buy it in Dhaka, en route to London.
Pari's khalu (abbu's elder sister) lived in Dhaka. She would be staying with her for a few days, khalu had insisted on that. She was partial to Pari, her only brother's first child. Though she had not liked the idea of Pari going so far, she had relented as she knew how much the family needed the money, to give the children a decent start. She herself had been very lucky to have got married in an educated and liberal family, coming from her modest back ground in Ardapunia.
It would take some time for her visa; Ratan cha cha suggested that in the meantime, she should take help from Parvin mam, at school, to get conversant in English.
Ashok da send the tickets; Dhaka to London. They were to leave home, a week before, so that Pari could spend some time with khalu. Ammi did not come to Dhaka, as Kajol and Shona's school-term had started.
As the bus, headed for Dhaka, rounded the corner by the post office, Pari's eyes filled with tears.