(Katrina's POV)
This last year has taken a toll on me, all the things I have to learn, and the strict rules I have to follow when I'm out in public.
I love my parents and they love me back but they have expectations and they want me to meet them, so they are making me learn more and train more.
I also lose a lot of time with Serules, ahh I wish I see him more. I also thought of a good nickname for him, I can just call him Seer if he approves.
Just thinking about him makes my mood better, I feel more refreshed. The happiness that comes from remembering what it was like doing things with him.
He didn't have high expectations for me he never scolded me because I couldn't do things. The spars we had sparked my competitive spirit it helped both us of grow, but he never got mad because he couldn't win.
Every time we did something together my heart would race and my body heat would rise. It felt like happiness. I don't know what it means but I feel comfortable around him.
The tutor goes through the proper etiquette of being a daughter of a duke.
The only thing that gets me through the day is the hour spar and games with Seer. It is so blissful it makes my heart tremble.
It feels like time goes by so fast whenever I am around him.
Luckily when he slept over a couple of days ago he forgot to take his undershirt back with him. It may seem weird, but when I sniffed it, I smelled fantastic like the ocean breeze. I got addicted to the scent.
I would sniff it at least 5 times before going to bed, it helped me relieve stress and helped me fall asleep.
I asked my mother what I was feeling when I was around him and she said it was just a childhood crush.
So I asked her if it is like the romance I always hear about. She said kind you could say it is having feelings for them that is more than a friend but not a lover yet.
I said what is the best way to maintain happiness and love, she replied "don't let it get away, If you have to you can use an extreme measure of trapping him and keeping him locked up. But just make sure you keep track of him and just continue to be yourself if he likes you that way".
I took that to heart, and the next day I asked Serules if I could call him Seer and he said yes. YAY!!!
But this moment with him or unreplaceable, I hope we can be together until we grow up and maybe even longer.
The next day is just more same old same old. The tutor comes in to teach me about economics today because I might take over my father's land unless mom has another child and he decided that child will take over the land.
Every day for the whole seven days just the different tutors taught me about the main studies; World Geography, Economics and Accounting, Etiquette, Math, Reading, and Writing, Dancing and Socializing, and Science.
But these days I work a lot harder because if I am forced to learn this I at least want My Seer to appreciate and praise me for learning these things.
The thought of his praising me gets me excited, It makes me want to learn more and push harder.
I know one day If I learn this stuff and I put it to use in front of Seer he will see me in a better light and It will make me become pure bliss.
A couple of days later I finally found out my feeling, I truly do love him and I want to be his light.
He has been my light, It may not seem a lot but If I didn't have him to play with I would be in a miserable place right now. He also gave me words of praise and was genuine with him.
He was my source of encouragement to keep on going no matter how hard.
I just was to contain him in a bottle. Just imagining him with other girls at the banquets he has to attend makes me jealous and angry. I don't want to make him mad or constrict him but I just want him to look at me.
I can't tell him it, so I am just going to bottle it up for now. whenever he sleeps over he brings an extra pair of clothes and I replace the old undershirt with the one he wore that day.
I can't help it anymore just those couple of hours we are together making me feel so happy, intoxicated, blissful.
The times we sleep over I try to get as close to him as possible and sniff him. I don't think he notices but he also does allow me to snuggle close to him, my head gets buried in his chest and he starts stroking my head. That always feels like heaven when he does that.
I can tell he is very perceptive to how I feel thought because he always does goofy stuff when I am sad or encourages me when I am lazy, and sometimes tells me I did well or other praises.
The only thing he does is always put as much effort into the spars, it may seem better to lose on certain days to cheer me up but he is doing it for my sake so I can find my faults and vice versa.
So We can both improve, and become stronger to protect what we love.
These feelings might be obsessive or possessive but I know he will become handsome in the future, I know girls will flock to him but there must be something I have to do, whether I am considered crazy for it or not.
HE WILL BE MINE ONLY, NO ONE ELSE CAN HAVE HIM, NO ONE.