It had been almost a week since my meeting with Rebecca. I sat in the bunk on the bottom, my bunk, staring at the rails above my head. Lost in thoughts. Sometimes it's memories of that day, sometimes it's memories of before everything went downhill, and sometimes I picture myself having a different life all-together. The sound of whispers coming from outside of my cell, immediately rips me away from my trance. My ears try to focus on the sounds and turn them into words for my brain to process. However, no matter how hard I try, my ears fail. Within moments, two girls are walking into my cell. One of them is quite a bit larger than me. She has a very strong jaw-line, and appears to be in her early 40's. The second girl did not worry me as much. She was barely 5 foot and very scrawny. Her collar bones popped out of her chest, and her cheekbones had begun to look sunken in.
"So you're the bitch that did it?" I had been expecting something like this for months after it happened. I was prepared. I had been spending my days doing work-outs and for months my body was in the best shape it has ever been in. After a while, I got too comfortable and stopped worrying about the other crazy women in here. That was clearly a mistake. They are criminals too. "Probably." I reply nonchalantly. Even throwing in a shoulder shrug. I had learned you had to be confident to survive this place. No one knew what you had up your sleeve, speaking boldly always gives off the impression you aren't scared. I won't let anyone see me scared here. "My sister is pregnant by him you dumb bitch." This sentence throws me off guard. A pressure begins building in my chest, and my body is starting to become hot. "What did you just s-" before I can finish something hard hits me in the head. I can't see what she is holding, but I notice she is cocking her arm back to swing again.
My hand instinctively reaches for hers and grabs it. She tries pulling away from me , but I have a good grip and begin digging my nails into her flesh. Before she can react, I pull my head back as far as I can and ram it into hers with all of my force. She stumbled backwards. "Did you just head-butt me bitch?" She says through gritted teeth. My heart leaps when I realize I don't see the scrawny girl anymore. A pair of bony hands wraps around my throat from behind, and begins squeezing. The hardness of her fingers almost hurt worse, her bones were pressing into my pipes and crushing them. My feet pushed off of the ground. My body flung backwards towards the wall, and I felt the pressure of her body slamming against it. I brought my elbow back and forth into her body several times before I heard her begin coughing, and felt her body beginning to droop.
There was not a moment to catch my breath before the larger girl brought her arm back again and slung the sock. I leaned back, and it narrowly missed my head. She went to swing again, but I charged towards her, throwing all of my weight into her. She stumbled backwards but was not falling. I tried wrapping my legs around hers to make her lose balance, but this was just not working. I felt the sock slam down on my back, and for a while it became hard to breath. My body was trying to force in oxygen, but my lungs weren't wanting to open. "Now there are 3 children with no father." She sneered out. Hearing this made my blood boil. I started seeing black dots in my vision. Everything that happened next was a blur. It was like I had passed out and someone else took control over my body.
I remembered feeling the anger building inside me, but I couldn't remember anything after that. When I came to I was on top of the larger woman. Blood was leaking out of her head and her nose. Her eyes looked vacant and I was scared I had killed her. My eyes wandered over to my hand that was being weighed down by something, and I realized I had somehow gotten the sock from her. I sat straddled over her, and opened the sock. There were multiple little rocks inside. The prison makes sure all of the larger rocks are thrown off grounds. To prevent instances like this. Whoever she is, she must have been saving up these pebbles for a while. Guards surround us, and before I know it I am being drug to solitary.
I had spent a few weeks in here when I first arrived. At first I liked it, I was alone. I caught up on sleep, and sat with my own thoughts for longer than I think I ever have. However, that soon turned into something that began driving me mad -- if I wasn't already. My feet dragged across the concrete floors, my head hung low. I did not know what my face looked like, but I did not want any of the others thinking I had lost. If I showed any weakness, they would all come for me. The guard said nothing as he threw me in the room the size of a closet. So, I said nothing back to him. There was no point in asking questions. They did not care.