Zemira loosened her bun and brushed her hair, then she heard something falling downstairs and the sounds of shoes running then something falling again.
She went downstairs, "What is going on?" she asked and saw a wasted Cassian on the floor and all the servants were around him. "Is he drunk?" she asked and Gertrude walked to her then she bowed, "As you can see my lady, the viscount is drunk. And we never had to cater for him while he was drunk because he usually drinks in his room".
Zemira looked at Cassian then at Gertrude, "What does he normally take when he is drunk?" "We do not know. He usually drinks in his room and then he falls asleep" Gertrude said and Zemira sighed, "Get him up to his room and then fetch me a cup of coffee".
The servants dropped Cassian on his bed and then Gertrude handed her a cup of coffee then all of them exited the room.
Zemira looked at Cassian who had his arm on his eyes. "Get up!" she said as she kicked his shin. He removed his arm from his eyes and looked at her, "Drink this!" she said and he looked at the cup in her hand, "What is that?" "Something that would sober you up."
He threw his arm back on his eyes and chuckled, "If only I had been sober on that day, perhaps I would not be drunk now."
Zemira wondered what he meant by that, but she kept her questions to herself and kicked him again, "Here, drink this!" she stretched out the cup to him and he gagged, which made her move back. "Do not soil everywhere, just drink this!"
He got up and slurred, "I do not want that!" he flung the cup out of her hand, the coffee spilling on the floor and a bit on her nightgown, and the ceramic cup and saucer fell down with a crashing sound, breaking into pieces.
She snapped her head at the broken ceramic pieces on the ground, then at Cassian who was about to grab a bottle of whiskey from his bedside table.
His hand was already on the bottle, but she smacked it away and took the bottle. He glared at her, "Give that to me!" "In case you might have forgotten, it is late and I would like to get some sleep, and it is not only for me, it is for your baby as well. You drinking around and making noise would prevent that."
"I was not asking, Zemira! Hand that over to me!" he staggered to her and tried to take it, but she moved closer to the bed, the hand holding the bottle was over her head, as she kept on moving back to avoid him taking the bottle.
He lunged at her and they fell on the bed, but she still held the bottle firmly in her hands. His hand tried to pry off her slender fingers from the neck of the bottle, but she would not budge.
"Get off me! I need to go!" she yelled, "Give me that bottle first!" he growled but she kept her hand wrapped firmly around it.
All their tossing and arguing was getting him sober. He was getting a touch of reality and he did not want that. That night, he just wanted to be alone with his drunk thoughts.
If words are not going to persuade her, force would, he thought and took out his dagger then he held it up to her throat, he pressed it against her ivory skin.
The cold metal sent chills down her spine and she let go of the bottle. Finally, he sighed and his fingers moved up to the bottle, but then, he noticed that her hands were now at her belly, protecting her baby from him, and her eyes were closed, as she wished for him to disappear.
Cassian was intrigued, "I thought you did not want the baby" he said and she opened her eyes and looked down and saw her hands on her belly. She wanted to let go, but her hands had a mind of their own and remained in place.
"Please, just let me go. You can do whatever you wish with the whiskey," she begged, her voice breaking.
"You wanted to stop me from drinking. Why? Do you care about me now that you would not want to see me drink myself to stupor and then eventually die? Would you not be elated if I am dead? Afterall, you would be free from the mad viscount and then you can decide to kill the little burden in your womb" he taunted and tilted his head as he pressed the dagger more, making a little cut on her throat.
"I...I did it for myself...and this baby," tears welled up in her eyes as she felt her blood staining his dagger. She clutched her belly tighter, as she breathed heavily. She was scared, and had started believing the rumors about Cassian being mad.
She was scared of the mad man hovering over her.
Suddenly, she found herself speaking, "You are right. I will be free, free from you and free from this burden. But if you are going to die, you would die by my hands because you put this burden in me and so you must suffer my pain. The pain of getting married to a mad man, the pain of almost creating a scandal, the pain of my mad man of a husband, pressing a dagger to my throat."
Tears were streaming down her face, but he still kept the blade at her throat. Monster, she screamed in her head. What kind of man did not feel weak when a woman teared up? Only that Cassian was not just a man, he was a mad man, no, he was a monster.
Cassian pressed the dagger more, making the cut a little wider and she gasped and closed her eyes.
She was trembling. He noticed.
"Get out!" he whispered and she opened her eyes. Fear was written all over her face, and it made him feel like the mad man people called him.
"Get out!" he yelled and she pushed him off of her and ran out.
He grabbed the bottle from the bed and uncorked it and was about to take a swig from it, but he remembered Zemira's words and tears and how mad he felt.
He sighed and threw the bottle at the wall beside him, with a shout.
Gertrude ran in and saw the glass pieces on the floor and whiskey rolling down the walls. She turned to the bed and saw Cassian lying down with his arm on his eyes.
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Zemira watched Gertrude with keen interest as she taught her how to knit a flannel.
Cassian was spying on them. Why am I nervous? I am Cassian Monterey . I have battled so many villains and I had not been scared, but yet here I am, shaking over giving a woman flowers, he thought as he rested his back on the wall.
He tried to peep again, but this time, his grey eyes jammed Gertrude's light ones and she raised a brow. He shuddered and hid behind the wall again.
Zemira looked at Gertrude, then at what she was staring at, the wall. "Is everything alright?" she asked and Gertrude looked at her and nodded, "Yes, my lady" she said and continued showing her how to knit.
Cassian took a deep breath and straightened his shoulders, then he came out of his hiding place.
Gertrude saw him coming and so, she dropped her knitting tools, gave a bow to Zemira who was surprised at what was going on, and then gave a bow to Cassia and left.
Zemira turned and saw Cassian holding a bouquet of lilies. She got up and was about walking away, but he called her, "My Lady!"
She stopped and looked at him, then at the flowers in his hand, "Are the flowers for your funeral?" she asked and continued walking, he followed her.
"I deserve that" he nodded and stood at her front, "But umm...the flowers are for you" he gave a slight smile. "The flowers are pretty, but I do not think your baby likes pretty things. Perhaps it takes after its father."
"Miss Cobain..." he was about saying, but she interrupted, "You are supposed to smile when apologizing to a lady."
"Apologize? I am not apologizing. I am only being courteous for my behaviour last night" "Oh wow, you still have the mouth to argue. Well then, I suggest you use that same mouth to eat your flowers, since you are a vegetarian."
Cassian wanted to tell her that was a low blow, but he felt it was necessary to apologize, "Can you just accept the flowers?" he said through gritted teeth and she smirked, "Only if you smile."
Zemira longed to see the smile she had seen on his face when he was talking about Gerta. Cassian rolled his eyes and his lips went sideways, making an ugly grin. "I said smile, not cry" she chuckled.
Cassian's lips lifted up slightly. It was not the smile she had seen but it was better than the former. "I apologize for my behaviour last night, my lady" he said through gritted teeth.
Zemira almost laughed but she composed her self and sighed, "Fine! But only because the flowers are pretty" she said and took the flowers then she smelt them. They smelt like lilies and dew. She liked them. There was no retching or gagging, it seemed like the baby liked the smell too.
He looked at her neck and saw the small purple cut. "Is your neck okay?" he asked and she looked at him and touched her neck, "It is a bit sore but I am alright" she said and he shook his head. It was inflamed. "No you are not!" he said and gently pushed her to the chair behind her.
He loomed over her and her cheeks turned pink. He bent down to her and tilted her head up. Zemira's face heated up. Cassian was staring down at her bare neck. She had worn a dress which showed her cleavage, so he was also seeing that.
"Is anyone there?" he shouted and a servant girl came and bowed, "Get my ointment from my room" he ordered and she bowed and left. Cassian turned back to Zemira's neck. She gulped and Cassian's eyes widened at the movement of her gullet. His eyes snapped to the fluttering pulse on her neck.
Zemira decided to use conversation to push away any thoughts she was having about him, "Is it okay to send a servant to your room?" "I know and trust all my servants" "A former general trusts everyone?" she smirked. "All the servants here were once my most loyal soldiers. They would die for me."
"Women were in your army?" she was quite curious. "Of course. They are far more skilled than any man I know. Though the men in the court did not approve of it, the king had no problem," he said and the servant came back with the ointment.
Zemira felt a cold finger on her neck. Her neck was her tickle spot so she started twitching around. "Would you stay still?" Cassian said and she covered her mouth to stop herself from laughing.
He continued applying the ointment then she could not help herself, she burst out into a very unladylike laughter. He was shocked. Her laughter was wild, just like her personality...but he liked it.
She found him staring, so she stopped laughing. Gertrude walked in and saw them, she cleared her throat, "The marquis and marchioness of Damodar are here."
He stood up straight and helped her up.
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She uncovered her hood and got a knee then she bowed, "Cassian seems to be getting close to the new wife" she reported and the man on the throne laughed, "Seems like he got over Nola so quickly."
"I do not think that is the case. I have known Cassian since he was baby. He is not one to get over someone easily. He still reminisces about his parents till now" she said, "The new wife is pregnant with his baby, that was why they had gotten married."
"Interesting" the man on the throne sneered then he smirked, "Continue your good work" "What about my son, my lord?" "He is fine...continue watching Cassian and report to me what he does and your son will be in good hands."
She bowed again then she got up and walked out. "Can we trust her, my lord?" an old man in a suede green jacket and black trousers, asked. The man on the throne smiled, "We have her son, of course we can trust her" he grinned then he crossed his legs on the throne, "I can not wait to see you...my darling younger brother."
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The doctor checked Zemira's pulse then he checked her eyes. He touched her ankles and looked at Cassian who was feeling a bit nervous. "She is okay. Actually, she is in good shape" the doctor smiled and everyone breathed a sigh of relief.
Zemira rolled her eyes. Everyone seemed to be happy except her. When the servants had left the room with the doctor, Cassian looked at her, "You do not look happy" he said and she sighed, "What is there to be happy about? The pregnancy is growing and it is draining the life out of me."
"Did you ever discuss having children with the duke of Leorda's son?" "Stern? We did and we were okay with not having". "Were you both courting?" "It was just casual fraternizing. We could sleep with whoever we wanted."
"Was that why you had slept with me?" he asked smirked and Zemira's face heated up. They had not brought up that heated night since they had gotten married.
"That night was a party. A birthday party for a bar owner's daughter. Since it was our favorite bar, Stern and I had gone to celebrate with the family and their daughter. But then, Stern kissed the birthday girl, leaving me heartbroken and since I was drunk, I was aroused. I stumbled upon your room and the mistake was made and now, I have a burden in my womb and here we are, married" she gave a false smile as she looked at her belly which was slowly getting bigger.
"One day, you will call our baby something good because you would love him or her." Zemira was quite flustered when Cassian had called the baby "our". When he had said "our baby", he had said it with so much love. Or was she imagining it?
She looked away from him, "The only thing I shall ever love is alcohol and nicotine". Cassian rolled his eyes, "For now" he said and left.
For now, for now, for now, Zemira repeated in her head. What did that mean? Was he going to make her fall in love with him? Was she just overthinking things?
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Zemira sat under the parasol watching Cassian ride Gerta. She looked down at her belly and hit it gently, "It is your fault that I can not ride that silly horse," she huffed.
"Having a little chat with the baby, are we?" Gertrude asked as she came and dropped a cup of tea for Zemira.
"Oh I asked for coffee" she reminded Gertrude, "The viscount has ordered that no one gives you coffee even though you request for it" "But---" "If you have a problem, you can take it up to the viscount yourself" Gertrude said calmly then she gave a bow and left.
Zemira tsked, "How is she so calm when she is being so rude?" she looked up and saw a carriage riding into the premises.
It rolled to a halt in front of the field and the footman got down and opened the door. Stern stepped out in his pair of black trousers and a light blue jacket over a navy blue shirt. On his head was a black top hat.
"Stern?" she gasped as he walked towards her. He took her hand and pressed a kiss to it, "My lady" he said and Zemira looked at Cassian who got down from Gerta as he watched them then he stormed off inside.
She turned back to Stern and smiled, then she realized that her hand was still in his so she jerked her hand back, "Shall we go in?" she asked and he nodded.
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Gertrude bowed, "The viscount is feeling a little under the weather so he would not be able to join you" she said and Stern got up in a fit of rage, "Preposterous! He was hale and hearty when I got here!" Zemira held his hand to signal for him to sit down. "If you have a problem with it, you can go up to his room, if you dare" Gertrude said calmly.
"How dare you? You lowly---" Gertrude bowed and then left. Stern looked at Zemira, "What an insolent maid!" he said "She is actually the butler," she muttered as she bit into her scone.
"How can a noble hire a woman to do a man's job?" Stern scoffed, "And she is quite rude on top of it! As expected from a staff of a mad man."
"You do not need to insult him in his own home" Zemira said and Stern snapped his head at her, "Are you defending him now? Are you so much in love with him that you do not wish for anyone to speak ill of him? Have you gotten over me so quickly? Did you ever really love me?" he asked quite enraged.
"I should be asking you that question" she said calmly. "What?" "You kissed Peony, would you have kissed her if you were in love with me?" she asked and he ran a hand through his curly hair, "Zemy, I told you, I was drunk!"
"And now I am married. Look at where your drunkenness has led us to" she sighed and looked at him, "Well that is all in the past now," she shrugged and poured tea into his teacup, then she handed it to him, "Do have a cup of tea and stop complaining about the workers."
He flung the cup out of her hand, "I do not want to have a cup of tea. Especially if the tea was made by one of the mad people in this house! Look at you, Zemy, you are defending that old hag's insolence. Is that not madness?! Has the Mad Viscount's madness gotten to you as well?"
Zemira got angry and she stood up, "Now you are just being plain rude! You can not just come into my house and call my husband and servants mad! I will not tolerate that behavior just because we are friends!"
"Your husband? So you do love him" Stern scoffed and she put her hands at her hips, "Whether I am in love with him or not, that is none of your business! Now get out before I call the guards" she said and moved out of his way.
"Zemira, are you kicking me out of your home?" he asked but she did not say anything. She just breathed heavily.
"You are kicking me out because of him, Zemy?" "Well what should I do? You are in his home and you are causing a scene, so please leave!" she breathed and he looked at her unbelievably and snatched his hat from the chair and stormed out.
Zemira slumped on the chair and Cassian came out of from behind a wall, "Falling in love with me already?" he smirked and she looked at him, "Why did you defend me?" "I simply found his actions discourteous. It is not right to be rude to someone or his household in his own home" she said and got up then she walked past him but he held her arm.
"I do not want to see that man in my house again" he warned and glared at her. "Why are you telling me? It is your manor. Put a ban out in front to prevent him from coming in." His nails dug into her skin, "I am telling you because he is your lover. Him coming here frequently can cause a scandal and I am not ready to be the centre of attention again" he said and let go of her arm then he walked away.
Zemira turned and watched him as he walked away. He was very confusing to her. Sometimes, they are getting along and the next second, he is as hostile as ever, telling her what she should and what she should not do.