I don't really know the reason why but as I kept calm and started writing, I came to a conclusion.
[Was there ever a point in doing this?]
Like a shooting star, it burst into the starry sky... that is my mind, that is... it is.
So the story started like this,
I just had a really deep existential crisis. I woke up from my afternoon sleep and opened the popular video-sharing platform, Youtube. Just a few scrolls in, I found, you guess it, a crime documentary. It was a horrendous trip the entire time. I felt suspended like a dog and its mistress.
After going through the 40 minutes of insanity, I looked outside of the curtain-covered window (I'm a shut-in, just so you know) and realized that it has already been dusk. I felt the need to jog outside, but my body seems to be glued onto the floor itself, rendering the possibility of any movement a void. Broken hearted and shunned away from the grasses and the wind, I had to make a decision. This might sound really bad, but I decided to draw something.
Yes, I am not talented, but there's no harm in trying, don't you agree? As it so happens, I had already stored over ten thousands images (its killing my phone storage) which consisted of memes, anime illustration, art guides, word collection, prompts, mild hentai (yes, and I've yet to organize it), videos and also some manga/comic pages. From those thousands of others, I also have guidelines. Yes, and only recently did I found these neat guidelines called "YCH" where they're kind of template that you commissioned to the artist that provided it, and they draw your character in those template.
I am rather confident in my own skill (I've worked it out by tracing other people's artwork and fix it, acting like I did a better job than the original artist (I repented though)) and so I started to bulk-download it. I found a good one, and so the entire process started. For about half an hour, I managed to take out the line, and putting eyes, hair and clothes on. After that, it took around an hour and a half to color and walla sin tiero, I completed it.
I placed some filter on it, and then enhanced it with some AI technology and fier ven tiero, it looked gorgeous. I signed it and showed it off to my discord server, and nobody reacted.
That might sounded bad, but precisely because nobody would ever interact with me that I can sign it and show it off. What kind of awful fella would publicly show off a ripped works? That's nuts.
But showing it off because nobody cares? That based AF ("as fuck", children these days used it commonly).
Knowing that nobody would react to it, I went off and started to charge my phone.
This is where it started to go wild.
As soon as I got out, the world cup match had already started. Originally, I wanted to take a bath, but that can wait.
I sat down in front of the television and watched in awe as the first team completely outdone the first half match. I felt dumb, yet my silliness made me watch it more.
The second team got bullied, but then, a chad (he literally looks like The Chad (Ernest Khalimov (Aka The Chad))) scored a clean goal.
I was filled. I can feel the happiness coming inside of me. I felt happy. A genuine feeling of gratefulness swelled within me. That was no doubt one of the best thing I've experienced over this entire year. Heck, even the depressing feeling of graduation can't defeat this literal adrenaline rush.
A few minutes after that, it kind of just died.
The latest substitute for the second team has an overwhelming presence. Not because of his intimidating skills, but because he's the literal embodiment of sloth. While his entire team worked their hardest, he stood alone, tying his shoe and dancing like a woodcock.
[What the hell dude, move!] I yelled in anger.
That guy was pure laziness. He might have a decent footwork, but his motivation to play was close to nowhere. The entire match after that was too much for me to handle, that I would actually went for the bath and came out feeling refreshed.
I checked my discord again, and nobody replied, just like I predicted. However, instead of continuing the story, I decided to come here.
I almost died of heart attack.
Actually no, I almost died of cringe. The silly me took over my mind, and I wrote this.
The silly me was calmer than the real me.
I am embarrassed.
for real